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please help i don't know what to do and it's driving me crazy


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Well, me and my boyfriend have not been dating for very long and well he always tells me he loves me and want to be with me forever and that I am the best thing that has ever happen to him he is just very nice u could say every girls dream. Well i always wanted a guy like that a guy who would tell me he loves me a guy who would listen to me and when i am hurting he is always there for me. Now that i got that i am acting very strange it's like i hurt him i say things to him that i shouldn't i am just mean to him like i play with his feelings like today i told him i cheated on him but i didn't i was just playing i just wanted to see what he would do and well he got kinda mad and then when i told him i was playing then he told me to stop playing with his feelings. I feel so bad he is so perfect and i just cant stop playing with his feelings and start arguments with him i like him a lot you know and don't wanna be with out him. He is the first guy that has ever treated me so good and told me he loves me none in my whole life no guy has ever done the things he is doing for me. And i am being such a bitch to him i don't know why i do it why am i trying to hurt the guy i think i am falling in love with. I always say mean things to him and last time he even said Kim if u don't stop all this that you are doing the love i have for you is going to slowly go away. I don't want that to happen. Like he tells me he loves me and i say whatever and sometimes i say i love u too to him but then sometimes i tell him that i don't trust him and i don't like the way he is and he needs to change i don't know why i am doing that. I love him and he loves me i have never done that to any other guy i have been nice to all my ex boyfriends. And i tell him i will stop but always keep doing and saying things that i should not. I am so sad i have been crying cuz i don't know what is wrong with me i love him so much n i am like that please someone help me i don't know what to do anymore

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Your inability to cease saying things you don't want to say is a rather curious phsychological anomaly. It could be that subconsciously you are actually afraid of a good relationship and are trying to destroy it. In that case a good psychological counsellor may be able to help.

 

But if you really want this relationship and have no control of your mouth and what you say, you need to see a psychiatrist at your earliest opportunity. This is a rare pathology that requires a combination of intense counselling and medication.

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hi shugar,

 

i can't help but wonder if you are, in a sense, 'testing' your boyfriend. what i mean is, when you tell him you cheated on him, are you doing this to see what kind of reaction you will get from him? do you think if he walked away, it would mean he didn't love you, or if he stays, he is in love with you? because let me tell you, spinning yarns to your boyfriend to get a reaction, will not be a test of his love for you.

 

i also get the sense that you are feeling fairly insecure in this relationship. you say that no other guy has ever treated you like this before, which is another reason why i wonder if you are 'testing' his feelings for you.

 

i would suggest that if you are so keen to hang on to your boyfriend, stop playing head games with him. this will be your downfall if you don't stop, because he will get fed up and leave you. there's no doubt about it. he is so right in telling you that if you don't stop this, the love he has for you will slowly fade away......listen to what he says and listen carefully: "THE LOVE I HAVE FOR YOU...".....he is telling you he loves you. don't be so afraid to accept that as the truth, and don't let how other guys have treated you in the past affect the present. the past is no longer, and every guy is different.

 

please, stop these games with him before you push mr perfect out the door. there is no doubt in my mind that he will fall out of love with you if you don't get it together and there is NO need to act this way towards him.

 

good luck to you :)

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Dragonflys

Never hurt the nice guy unless you have a reason to

 

That's what I say, coz I'm a nice guy, and I have been taken advantage of in the past.

 

If you need to keep teasing him to feel satisfied, then maybe you are not right for him. You know it hurts him and the fact you do it may reveal that you have issues with receiving love, and you want to get your kicks out of having power over his emotions.

 

Maybe you need some cold hearted poster boy to give you a nice roller coaster love affair.

 

If you have these issues, please see someone and deal with them or leave him so he can find a nice girl, don't hurt him any more.

 

Oliver

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For heaven's sake, stop torturing the poor guy! He deserves a girl who will treat him as well as he's treating you. You certainly aren't giving him what he deserves.

 

No use crying about it. Being sad isn't going to help either. Be very happy and grateful that this guy acts so wonderful towards you. You will not find too many guys that will put up with what you're putting him through. If you think about it, HE's the one that should be sad and crying, he's trying to work this out, and you keep shooting him down.

 

Like the advice above, either get some help and shape up your act, or do him a huge favor and let him go.

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