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Is it becoming more common for Grandparents to spoil their Grandchildren with gifts?


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Old 12th December 2017, 3:46 PM   #1
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Is it becoming more common for Grandparents to spoil their Grandchildren with gifts?

My parents does this with my brother's children. The oldest is 2. She is constantly showering them with gifts. Even on the holidays like Christmas, Easter, Valentine's Day etc. and their birthdays. Then I overhear my mom complain about money. My sister-in-law has complained to me about my parents' too many gifts giving. I think my brother may of complained to my mom about it then she got upset so they just allow my parents do what they want when it comes to giving gifts.

Nowadays, most Grandparents have less Grandchildren than years past. So, I can see it happening and becoming a common occurrence that they are overindulging them with gifts. If they can afford it, then more power to them.

My worry is I don't want my niece and nephew growing up to be ungrateful, spoiled brats with a sense of entitlement. This is especially true if one of my parents die and less money will be available to spend on them. My dad is a bit older than my mom so I can see that happening.

My parents, especially my mom completely revolves her life around the grandchildren and my brother along with the wife. They don't really have outside hobbies or friends separate from them. It doesn't seem a big deal right now because the kids are still very young and both parents are still alive.
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Old 12th December 2017, 4:39 PM   #2
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You know what...

Quote:
Originally Posted by ChattyKat View Post
My parents does this with my brother's children. The oldest is 2. She is constantly showering them with gifts. Even on the holidays like Christmas, Easter, Valentine's Day etc. and their birthdays. Then I overhear my mom complain about money. My sister-in-law has complained to me about my parents' too many gifts giving. I think my brother may of complained to my mom about it then she got upset so they just allow my parents do what they want when it comes to giving gifts.

Nowadays, most Grandparents have less Grandchildren than years past. So, I can see it happening and becoming a common occurrence that they are overindulging them with gifts. If they can afford it, then more power to them.

My worry is I don't want my niece and nephew growing up to be ungrateful, spoiled brats with a sense of entitlement. This is especially true if one of my parents die and less money will be available to spend on them. My dad is a bit older than my mom so I can see that happening.

My parents, especially my mom completely revolves her life around the grandchildren and my brother along with the wife. They don't really have outside hobbies or friends separate from them. It doesn't seem a big deal right now because the kids are still very young and both parents are still alive.
You know what... I am a grand parent.

And also, I know that you are thinking more for what might happen when you have kids. But you really should not worry what is going on with your sisters/brothers kids.

But I can tell you this, you need to understand that your/their parents worked hard and sacrificed to raise you kids into adults.

And guess what, grandkids are the payoff for all that hard work.

And no offense, but grandkids are way better that your actual kids, sorry.

So let them have fun spoiling them. It is what we do, and it is just the way that it is.
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Old 12th December 2017, 4:47 PM   #3
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I can't wait to have grandchildren to read to and go bike riding with and take to the beach! I plan to let them know how very special they are to me every chance I get
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Old 12th December 2017, 5:09 PM   #4
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YUP! No control on that one. Already tried. My parents live some distance away from the kids, and they are the only grandkids so....Big money, lots of gifts (ie...irritating)

My wife parents are local to us here on the border. Not much money but flood with attention and validation for all the grandkids. They can do no wrong. lol
My MIL is a awesome cook, so food is everywhere. They never go hungry, in fact, my son has some weight to be watching out for...
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Old 12th December 2017, 5:21 PM   #5
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It takes far more than overly generous grandparents to create entitled children.
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Old 12th December 2017, 6:07 PM   #6
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another grandparent here...my heart aches for my grandkids ...literally......they are my joy and my sorrow.....if i have a chance to spoil them a little i do......i have partial custody of one grand daughter and i am a guardian to three......my adult kids have never complained about me spoiling them....i don't believe in giving presents willie nillie...my gift to them is my devotion and unconditional love in how i care for them....i am their advocate, their unfailing supporter....as long as i breathe...even when they get taken away from me....they are in my heart


there is something special about the bond between grand children and grand parents.....and its meant to be there......its a bridge between generations filled with love....soppy huh....im missing two little faces this year hopefully ill see those faces at christmas....

some grandparents just love buying gifts.....its what they wish to do .....i think its their perogative to do so.....but...i do feel that kids need to know value and for grandparents to not make gifts ...unspecial...and i try to make all gift giving equal and fair........i do spoil the grandkids on birthdays and at christmas if i can.....i just am addicted to their christmas morning smiles......and that is what i would lose if i did the gift thing all the time...that specialness..those moments i hold close......those christmas and birthday smiles...which are completely different to an every day smile....

i feel honestly you should let your mum and dad treat their grandkids how they want to treat and spoil them and be happy for those kidlets and your mum and dad......best wishes.......deb
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Old 12th December 2017, 6:13 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by basil67 View Post
It takes far more than overly generous grandparents to create entitled children.
amen to this...deb
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Old 13th December 2017, 5:12 PM   #8
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My parents have jobs, friends, hobbies and everything, but they would still do absolutely anything for my daughter. She's their only grandchild and they love spoiling her whenever they see her.

They always tell me how much more they enjoy being grandparents than parents.

I love that she has grandparents who adore her and spoil her. As long as I, her mother, set boundaries and teach her responsibility, having people who love her certainly won't do her any harm.
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Old 13th December 2017, 5:32 PM   #9
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When I was little, my grandmother spoiled us rotten with gifts. I mean, we probably each got at least 30. It was absolutely insane. Neither my sister or I grew up to be entitled or even materialistic at all.

My parents used to buy a ton for my kids, too, and after saying for many years that she was "going to cut back" my mom finally did a couple of years ago. My kids, now teenagers, are totally fine and not at all entitled.

You should relax about this. Spoiling kids is in the grandparent job description.
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