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Facing the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life


Lilyana76

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My 12 year old son is high functioning autistic.

 

They have put him on some new medications the last couple of weeks, and he is having explosive rage, self harm, and not wanting to go to school.

 

Today I had to physically drag him, (and hes bigger than me) into his school, where he went to the principals office and proceeded to throw furniture at his door.

 

I have decided to put him in a mental health facility this afternoon, to let the doctors try to figure out his medication. I can not do it alone anymore.

 

I got fired from my job last week for this, constantly getting called to the school to come and try to control him. He is physically hitting me and throwing things at me daily, he is battering himself with anything he can get his hands on. I am terrified.

 

I also feel like the worst mom in the world to have to hospitalize him because I can not handle him at the moment. And as usual his father is no help whatsoever.

 

Am I horrible? What other option do I have?

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My 12 year old son is high functioning autistic.

 

They have put him on some new medications the last couple of weeks, and he is having explosive rage, self harm, and not wanting to go to school.

 

Today I had to physically drag him, (and hes bigger than me) into his school, where he went to the principals office and proceeded to throw furniture at his door.

 

I have decided to put him in a mental health facility this afternoon, to let the doctors try to figure out his medication. I can not do it alone anymore.

 

I got fired from my job last week for this, constantly getting called to the school to come and try to control him. He is physically hitting me and throwing things at me daily, he is battering himself with anything he can get his hands on. I am terrified.

 

I also feel like the worst mom in the world to have to hospitalize him because I can not handle him at the moment. And as usual his father is no help whatsoever.

 

Am I horrible? What other option do I have?

 

You have no other option he's now a danger to himself and others. You did the right thing.

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curiouslysearching

You are certainly not horrible. This is simply more than you

can manage and getting the right professional help is your

best option. Really unreal that the Dad does not want to help

with his own child.

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vanhalenfan

You absolutely did the right thing. I can relate. I have a 10 year old high-functioning Autistic son. We've been through the ringer regarding medications/adjustments over the years due to anger issues. Right now, it is manageable at home but I am terrified of the "puberty years" coming up. I can see myself getting to the point you are at. It's a very hard decision but sometimes it's best for the safety of others...I have 2 other children, a toddler being one of them and I can't leave him alone with her for a second. Do you have other children or is he your only?

 

Many hugs to you mamma...!

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hippychick3

You are absolutely not horrible!

 

You are doing what you need to do to protect not only yourself but your son from endangering himself. You are unequipped to handle him in this state. He is a danger to himself and others right now. Getting him the help he needs in order to correctly adjust his meds is your job as his parent.

 

Hang in there.

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GunslingerRoland

I'm sorry you are having to go through this.

 

I can partially relate, having a special needs child with behavioral difficulties.

 

I'll say this from experience with both my son, and other loved ones in my life, is that medication affects everyone differently, and you know best about medication and him. If you put him on one and there are extreme negative side effects, stop the medication right away. Then try again with something else.

 

I know at least in Canada, hospitalized care is much better than out patient when it comes to figuring out medication, so I think you've made the right choice to get things figured out.

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You are being a good parent and doing the best thing under the circumstances. I'm sure this doesn't make it any easier, but don't chastise yourself for doing what you need to do to take care of him AND YOURSELF.

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Thank you for the responses everyone.

 

He is not my only child, I have two others, a girl age 14, and a boy age 4.

 

So I just got back from the hospital, they told me they were unable to get ahold of his psychiatrist to ask if he should be admitted or not. They are waiting a response from him to see if he should be admitted. So here I sit, waiting.

 

The doctor on duty there suggested it might be best for my son to just change his meds again and try them at home and see how it goes from there.

 

I have been through this for the last 3 weeks, nothing is improving, its getting worse and I NEED HELP. They aren't listening to me, I feel like my son is being pushed to the side. I'm so frustrated right now. Can't they change his meds in there where he will be safe? At home I feel he may put himself or his siblings in danger.

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He is not my only child, I have two others, a girl age 14, and a boy age 4.

 

You have to think big picture and long term. You would be a less than vigilant parent if you exposed your 4-yr old to danger, even from a sibling. Stand your ground, you're on the right track.

 

I have a son (now adult) with similar issues, fortunately he was rarely violent. I used to feel very guilty about the numb state some of his meds put him in until I considered the alternative. Sometimes we're stuck with the best of two bad choices. Unless you've been through this, hard to understand.

 

Stay strong, pulling for you and your family...

 

Mr. Lucky

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