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Just some quick questions for y'all in LoveShack Land:

 

What is the "average" age a child begins talking? In your experience, especially if you've got little ones of your own, have your kids developed at about the same pace (i.e. did all three of your children begin speaking by the time they were 15 months, etc)?

 

I asked because my sister is giving my niece (her daughter) grief because the two year old grandson isn't talking yet. Compared to his chatterbox sister who is a year his senior, the child says a few words, but listens and takes direction very well, and understands everything you tell him. Apparently Granny refuses to take into consideration that maybe Big Sis doesn't give her little brother a chance to get a word in edgewise .... Anyhow, I'd like to hear from some of you who have observed little ones and their talking/speech habits.

 

thanks,

quank

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It's funny you should bring this subject up. I'm a nanny for a 19-month-old boy who has a brother who is a little over 3. I've kept the younger child since he was a newborn. These are my best friend's kids and I love them dearly. She worries about the same exact situation with her sons. The younger one doesn't talk much at all yet, although just recently he's started to say more words. But at 15 months he was basically not talking except the occasional mama and dada; whereas, his brother started talking very clearly much earlier and now you can sit and have conversations with him at 3. I definitely think he overshadows the younger one a lot of the time, but I keep the 19-month-old (Noah) full-time and he's the only child I keep so I always thought maybe that was part of it. After talking to people and reading a lot about it, I don't think that's the case. It's just that every child is different. My own son is grown and I know he talked quite a bit and very clearly by the time he was 18 months to 2 years.

 

I say grandma needs to back off and let the kid be. They will talk when they are good and ready. As long as they hear and understand what's being said to them and respond accordingly, there's nothing to worry about. I'm thinking I will just enjoy this time while he's not talking much because once he does it's going to be a lot less quiet around here. :)

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Hi Quankanne,

 

When considering a child's language skills as a marker of intelligence (this is at the heart of most grown up's anxiety over a when a kid talks), it is very important to distinguish between the child's EXPRESSIVE language skills (i.e., their ability to talk) and their RECEPTIVE language skills (understanding what is said).

 

It is the child's RECEPTIVE language skills that indicates intelligence -- not their EXPRESSIVE language skills. That is why I.Q. tests rely on the ability to understand what is being said (or written), and not what the child can say.

 

There are many, many factors that influence a child's ability to talk, including shyness, neurological impairments, developmental lags, pervasive develomental disorders, etc. None of these are necessarily related to I.Q. (On shyness, remember that "still waters can run deep".)

 

And give a child 10 hours a day of speech pathology to improve the kid's talking skills if you wish, but you will never raise their innate intellligence.

 

Having said all that, I.Q. is made up of different abilities. Some individuals will never have highly developed receptive OR expressive language skills, yet they can be genius in math. ("savants") But these are the exception. Usually receptive language and I.Q. go hand in hand.

 

Bottom line: Look at what the young child can understand, and not what he or she says, before deciding to worry about the child's intelligence.

 

Bottom, bottom line: There are many more important things to worry about in the development of a child than their I.Q. As Martin Luther King said, people should only be judged by the quality of their character.

 

Hope this helps.

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thanks, guys ... I asked some of the parents here in my office, and they basically said "don't compare Baby A to Baby B!" Which is common sense, but my sister tends to make mountains out of molehills. I'll pass this thread along to my niece and tell her to just sit back and enjoy the boy as he is ...

 

quank

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  • 1 month later...

I have four kids. My girl began talking much earlier than my boys. I worried that something was wrong and asked the doc about it. Girls in general begin speaking earlier than boys. If it is a real concern at the next doc appt have mom ask. Another thing I noticed is my daughter talked for her baby brothers. That was one reason, I believe, that they talked later than my daughter.

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thanks, double-Jen, I've noticed that my grandniece does ALL the talking for her little brother (and anyone else who will let her!), while he is content to just "be." However, my sister harps on the dumbest things, which usually upsets her daughter (the mother of these kids). I'm sure that the little one will start chattering up a storm when he's good and ready ...

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