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How to tell my controlling dad and step-mom I’m leaving?


KapriSun

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I’m 21 and I originally lived in Washington for all of my life practically. Last month I wanted to move to Texas to be with my dad, who remarried a woman who has kids, and try to go to school. It’s only been a month but I want to go back home, but I’m scared to tell them. My dad tends to get really angry really easily, and my step-mom likes to degrade my actions or who I am in general. I don’t have a car but i have money for a plane ticket and such....I don’t want to go behind their backs but I don’t know how to tell them I’m going back to Washington.

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Work out your plans of how to get there, where you'll live, your education plans and how you'll support yourself. When you've got it all lined up, present it as a done deal.

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Why did you move with them in the first place? It must have come across as a good idea at the beginning? Instead of running away from what is going on about you have a discussion on what's the real problem?

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My dad tends to get really angry really easily, and my step-mom likes to degrade my actions or who I am in general.

 

Agree with Gaeta, some reexamination in order.

 

Were you my child, I'd be upset and question your decision to leave after only 4 weeks. I'll assume your parents put some effort and expense into having you move in and abruptly bailing without a real effort to make it work makes you seem flaky and uncommitted.

 

As was advised, perhaps some honest discussion would be more valuable...

 

Mr. Lucky

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If you have the money for your plane ticket and a place to live just tell them you are moving out. So what if he gets angry you are a grown woman now.

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  • 2 weeks later...

While running away from the situation may be the easiest thing to do, staying and confronting your issues is the most mature thing to do. Why do you think your step-mom is critical? It sounds like you moved in right when school started, which is always a hectic time in a household. Maybe you could work on trying to establish a relationship with her and your step-siblings and making a place for yourself in this family. Contribute to the household in anyway possible. Become a helpful resource to your dad and step-mom to show your appreciation for them opening their home to you. Your cooperation and contribution will go a long way toward making the situation more bearable for everyone.

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