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I've been out of Touch and I feel bad about it....


InBloom

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I've been out of touch with some family, just been busy and haven't made the effort to see them and participate in family gatherings on my Dad's side of the family. They are still tight with each other and I sort of drifted away and have been doing my own thing. They are an 1 to 2 hours away from where my Wife and I live..

 

Recently we had a death in our family and my Uncle passed, so I went last month to the funeral. I felt so bad when a lot of my cousins, Aunts and family told me "It's so good to see you", "Haven't seen you in so long", "Where have you been", etc...and I saw a lot of recent photos of my Uncle and family and I was hardly in any of them.

 

I feel so much regret and remorse over it, like Why didn't I spend more time with them, Why haven't I made the effort to drive to see them? I loved my Uncle, I wish I had seen him more. He was sick for the last year and I wish I had gone to see him more. Granted, the last couple years i've been super busy with work sometimes working on the weekends as well but I could have tried...

 

MY QUESTION IS: I feel so guilty over it, I want to make it right and I want everyone to know that i'm here for them, How should I make this right? Part of me wants to personally ask for forgiveness from every one of them because my heart is sooo heavy with pain...but I also feel I should just jump right back in and make an effort to see them more and feel better about it and just make a new start

 

 

I dont want to be detached from them anymore

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Well, first of all, please shed some of that guilt. It isn't that bad. I think most adults realize that once you have your own spouse and family (or even if you don't but are young and busy), it's a given you will have less time for extended family. Don't worry over it. Just why not throw a backyard barbecue or family get-together soon and invite any who want to come and are close enough to do so without hardship. That will say it all.

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I feel the need to apologize to my Aunts and apologize to my Grandparents but I think it's just the guilt inside... It's true we're older now, I live farther, I have my own little family, Wife, Child, etc. Reading your post, I don't think I need to apologize so much as I just need to invite them as you said, make the effort to connect again.

 

Thanks Preraph

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