Feeling distant from my sister

[Funkymonkey]

Title saids it all. I'm feeling pretty distant from my sister. She's 11 years older than me. I'm 19 and she's 30. She's not married yet but has a boyfriend and they've been dating since high school so chances are there going to get married. It hasn't bothered me so much in a while until recently. While it's just me and my mom here in Canada, my dad is over in England working, and my sister is in Hong Kong working and living there with her boyfriend. I grew up spending most of my time with my Mom, my familly moved to Singapore for 2 years when I was 5, because my dad got a job there, my sister was in Grade 10-11 on her own in Canada. When I got back to Canada, she headed off for College out of town. Ever since Graduating till now She's be in working in Hong Kong.

 

I never see my sister, maybe once a year if I'm lucky, same thing goes for my dad except I see him a bit more. We never call each other, and it has gotten to a point where I feel like I don't have a sister anymore, I find talking to her like talking to a stranger. My friends have even ask me whether I'm an only child.

 

I don't know whether this is my fault or not.

[delicaterose]

My bf has the same issue with his sister, all you can do is try to strengthen that relationship make her realize that you want to get to know her you want to feel like you have a sister.

suggest a holiday or a short vacation you could both take?! is she responsive with you or is she distant? are there any internships or studies you can have in hong kong, and apply there

Try to bridge the gap you have between the two of you, in the end, you just have to make her realize that u need her:bunny:

[georgejungle]

I have the same relationship with my sister. She's 5 years older.

She lives in NYC. I forget I have a sister sometimes and that's sad.

We used to be real close, but ever since she moved out there, she

never calls me back, never answers my texts, etc. Granted she is

Married now and has a kid, but she is ALWAYS too busy to call me

back. Even emails, she won't answer till a week later.

 

I ALWAYS send her Birthday wishes, Send her little daughter (my neice)

presents for her birthday, etc....She never does the same for me.

 

You can't feel responsible or like it's Your Fault, you can't. I went

thru those feelings and realized, hey, i'm the one making an effort

to stay in touch and she doesn't seem to care. Whatever, i'll just

stop trying. And I have. It's not Neice's fault though, so I still will

wish my Neice a Happy B-day and send her a gift and at xmas.

 

if she really cared, she'd respond. Her excuse is she's always so so

busy. I'm obviously not a priority so...I won't lose sleep over it. I have

friends who care more than my own blood. that's fine with me.

 

at this point, it doesn't matter enough to me to try and "bridge that gap"

or get stern with her and tell her that it bothers me.