Janice Posted March 11, 2002 Share Posted March 11, 2002 My future mother-in-law is somewhat mean to her son. She told him he was a mistake, and she has lived recklacly and treated him poorly. He has forgiven her for all the stuff she has done. He has told me about these things and I cannot condone her behavior. I have met her once and she was stand offish. He has dinner w/ her several evenings during the week and they are close. We are engaged and are getting married. He has told me that she probally will not come to the wedding because her schedule is to busy. She has 1 year notice and she is retired. What should I make of this. I keep my distance from her because I don't like conflict. Should I make more of an effort to be close or not? I don't think I can like someone who would treat her child so cruelly. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted March 11, 2002 Share Posted March 11, 2002 Write her off. If she was nice, she'd be a great addition to your family. But she's a demon-possessed wench and you don't need her in your life. You better make real sure that she's not going to make problems for you after you're married. You also ought to pay loads of attention to your guy to see exactly what kind of lasting damage she did to him. An abused child can grow up to have many unhealthy emotional and behavioral characteristics. You may not even see any of these until you are married because the dynamics of dysfunctional families are such that a lot of the results of childhood abuse, repressed anger, and unresolved feelings a person has are worked out with his marriage partner. Good luck on this. Hopefully, you can have a good relationship with some of your guy's other relatives. I don't think it's any big loss if you never, ever have in-laws to speak of. They're a pain a lot of the time. I pray you will not have a lot of surprises in your marriage. Link to post Share on other sites
ok Posted March 11, 2002 Share Posted March 11, 2002 Wait a minute. Did he tell you she probably won't come because of her busy schedule or did she tell him that and he trasnmitted that message to you? Did you give her a formal written invitation? Has she said anything directly to you that would make you think she would not welcome you into the family or not attend your wedding? If he has forgiven her for her past behavior, behavior that occurred before you got in the picture, why are you creating conflict? Link to post Share on other sites
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