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I put off filing and lost everything


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A little post about keeping track of your finances during separation.

 

I want to tell you about my divorce and how, by me ignoring the situation and not taking charge, I will have to file bankruptcy.

 

My husband and I separated almost 3 years ago. He was very controlling and has an anger management problem as well. I moved to another country to start a business. During those 3 years, he made two trips to see me. The first one 2 years ago he physically assaulted me(leaving me with a huge 12 in scar), destroyed my personal and business belongings and then he spent a night in a Mexican Jail. Due to the fact that we still owned a business in the US, I didn't want to start divorce proceedings as I thought he would destroy the business there.

 

I filed for a divorce when I realized that he had maxed out all of our joint credit cards and all of the credit cards that were in my name and I found that all of them had been turned over to collection agencies.

 

His second trip down here, he moved all of my personal belongings out of our house here and tried to sell it to take all of the equity. He didn't get away with it. But, when he returned to the states and was served with the papers, he did destroy the business and sold or took all fixtures and furnishings in the business and disappeared with his girlfriend.

 

He came into this 10 year marriage without a dime. I had over $350,000.00 between the equity in my house and my 401K some of which I invested in the business in the states and the house. I now have $5,000.00 in the bank and close to $60,000.00 in credit card debt. All of this happened because I put my divorce off.

 

Several good things did happen though. Since he disappeared and didn't contest the divorce, the judge was quite fair trying to get some of my cash back. I was awarded my car, his truck (yes!! his truck too), a lien on the house here, my business......and spousal support of $1,000.00 per month for 10 years. May not ever see it. I now have to track him down and get the truck and since spousal support is now enforced like child support, I will just have the District Attorney start attaching his tax refunds and wages (when he works again).

 

He doesn't even have a clue yet on what the judgment is either.

 

He got the business in the states (which he had already destroyed). He also has to answer to the IRS about fraudulent tax returns he filed with my forged signature (I am working with the IRS on this).

 

Don't be foolish like I was.. Keep track of things. Cancel credit cards. Hang on to as much as you can, because if you don't, it could all be gone.

 

The best thing that came out of all of this is that I am in love with a wonderful man who loves me for me. Not what I have or will have.

 

Best wishes to all!!

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Good luck to you! I feel bad for what you have been through but it looks like you are moving in the right direction. It is good you have someone who loves you........hooray!

 

Maybe you might want to take out a restraining order considering his history of abuse.

 

I wish you all the best. There is life after BK. I know. I did it 10 years ago. :D

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Originally posted by Maria46

 

...he physically assaulted me(leaving me with a huge 12 in scar), destroyed my personal and business belongings...The best thing that came out of all of this is that I am in love with a wonderful man who loves me for me. Not what I have or will have.

 

Best wishes to all!!

 

I HATE VIOLENCE! Good luck to you! You have been through so much.

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Nocturnalkitee

Every day is the first day of the rest of your life!! I wish you well. I would like to know since your husband was penniless when the two of you got married, how were you able to get a judgment for 1000.00 dollars a month for the next 10 years? I understand that the two of you had a business together, but didn't you have more money then him?

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Nocturnalkitee

The reason why I ask is, if my husband and I were get divorce the most I would get would be 500.00 dollars per month for only six months. We have been married for 15 years, and I have only worked four years of the marriage.

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Reason I got that award was because of the value of the business and what he did to it. Instead of selling it, he just closed it. I had alot of money tied up in that business.

 

I also proved to the judge about the money he embezzled from the business, fraudulent taxes (forging my signature), taking all the tax returns and so many other "wonderful" things.

 

It is listed as spousal support to compensate wife for damages she has suffered as a result of Husband's acts of bad faith in dissipating marital assets. Transitional and compensatory spousal support.

 

 

My life is good now. Am poor, but very very happy.

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