green.tweety Posted March 4, 2012 Share Posted March 4, 2012 I'm getting divorced. I have no one to talk to, I am all alone with my child. I'm from Europe. one day my housband left to find work in germany (I am from Croatia). his family separated us from day one ane he always listen to them. they told him that I am not good for him, and they found him woman that in their opinion is the right one. he war abroad visiting his brother in switzerland and brother filled his had. when I asked him does he want divorce he said no and that I'm crazy,why do I Think sn and that I'm ok and that he is going to earn some money. and so he left again two months ago and never called us (me and the son). he told his step mum that everything is ok that he would call and that he is trying to get papers but he didn't call. he just left us. I'm all alone. can't understand how I over the night was no lmger good, how he just stoped loveing us. and now I'm a reck,crying non stop and he is ok. nothing botheres him. how to move on and forget him? how to put it out of my mind cause I'm going crazy? please help me. talk to me or anything... Link to post Share on other sites
coopster Posted March 4, 2012 Share Posted March 4, 2012 (edited) where you living now?, where did you meet? did you know this guy for a long time before you got married? cos from what you have said its a marriage of convenience Edited March 4, 2012 by coopster Link to post Share on other sites
Author green.tweety Posted March 4, 2012 Author Share Posted March 4, 2012 I am with my parents. It isn't the best solution but it is the only one that I have. Weknow each other for almost six years and been meeried for almost 4. My friend introduced us. It was at first friendship that grew into big love and now is ****. For him. For me, I know he had done us lot of pain but he is the love of my life and I am so affraid that I won't ever get better. Link to post Share on other sites
Yasuandio Posted March 4, 2012 Share Posted March 4, 2012 For now, you must "center" yourself, wipe your tears, so you may take care of your child. You are strong, and this is possible. First, wash your tears away, get dressed, your going to the market. You need to get some special things for yourself right now. Here is a list: nice quality bath oils and soap, special cream if you need some, soft little socks for your feet, delicious strawberries or fruit that you love, maybe a small box of chocolates, some nice soups for dinner, and candles. That is a good list for now. Turn the phone off, do not take calls from this man right now. We call that NC - No Contact. Get your child comfortable, fix thar bath with your new oil, candles, strawberries, and chocolates. Relax like a queen. Do this every night for your spirit. Now, for the 180's. I hope you can research them, or someone can copy them here for you. They are also on the Divorce-Busting website. You must do the 180's, no matter what. You will begin to feel much better. The first thing is to get control over yourself - and pay no attention to this DRAMA - because there is nothing you can do about it. You can only control yourself, and how you respond to curcumstances. The 180 shows you to respond by paying close attention to YOURSELF. So, next. A new hairsyle, some new color, a manicure. Whatever you can afford - this is the time to treat yourself. Make the salon appointment tomorrow. Start reading all the free material that is out there. Especially divorce busters. My husband is from Greece, so I fully comprehend this drama garbage. You must just ignore it. The story of the selection of a more suitable wife sounds like some weird fairytale from the middle ages. Be a modern woman, hold your head high, and refuse to discuss any such nonsense, period. The whole dang story is outrageous even by any modern standards in most civilized countries I can think of. But that doesn't stop the elderly or unsophisticated from trying to dredge up the old ways. Just ignore it. If any topic related to this nonsense comes up, distance yourself from the conversation, or say something to the effect of, "I refuse apply ancient customs to my lifestyle, therefore, you will have to change the subject, or this conversation is over". OR, simply, "I'm not interested in arranged marriages, especially mine." you get the idea? Short and sweet - with a dagger. Look for 180's and tell us what you have done to care about yourself and your child. I hope you are feeling better when I see your next post. Yas Link to post Share on other sites
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