Yasuandio Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 OK. I took the forums NC advice. I even went so far as to pay to have my numbers blocked on his phone (that was the area I was having issues with). He would call, or we would speak about a business matter. Then. We might be in touch by phone a few more times. I'd push for reconcilation, he'd back off. Then I'd make an idiot out of myself with numeriou voice mails (which has stopped). Last night his SUV was parked across the street from the house, in the wrong direction, with all the front lights on. I have noticed this several times before. This is the beginning of our third year of separation. We have a court date on Friday to take up some financial issues. I used to think that my husbands anger and resentment was a sign that he still cared for me. But a wise LS member convinced me that H is angry over divorce process and doesn't give a flip about me or our 25 yr marriage, that I've come to the point that I would like to save. However - H has demonstrated absolutly no positive movement or resposibilty. Therefore, I am asking the forum to tell me WHY he is taking the risk to observe my home? Please, can someone explain this to me? He knows that I have phoned the police about this before. I think it is harmless - and he is not staying very long. I am so confused. Thank you in advance for reading this. Link to post Share on other sites
Goldenspoon Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 Was infidelity ever involved in the marriage? Has he cheated? If so, he might think you're doing the samething with another man. Link to post Share on other sites
YellowShark Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 ...Last night his SUV was parked across the street from the house, in the wrong direction, with all the front lights on. I have noticed this several times before. This is the beginning of our third year of separation. ... He knows that I have phoned the police about this before. I think it is harmless... It is NOT harmless, it is intimidation. It is called stalking and can escalate and become very very dangerous. If he is out there again, call the cops, and keep calling the cops until he stops. Also document every time he does it and take pictures of him in his SUV outside your home for your lawyer. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stalking Stalking is a term commonly used to refer to unwanted, obsessive attention by individuals (and sometimes groups of people) to others. Stalking behaviors are related to harassment and intimidation. Link to post Share on other sites
iheartboobs Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 It means he's creepy as hell. File a restraining order and get back to not thinking about him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Yasuandio Posted January 24, 2011 Author Share Posted January 24, 2011 Thank you, here are a few more details. He ignored me as a woman for many years. I have seen him with the same woman on more than one occasion. I didn't get wise to the cheating until after the separation. I always just made an excuse for his lack of interest. If he has a girl, and HE wants the divorce to "move" then what's up with stalling the D process, and the watching the house? I am getting scared about the "stalking" responses I received. There was a time I was scared, when he had detectives following. But now, I'm curious. But to be completely honest, I am afraid for my 25 yr marriage to end. Isuffer from newly dianosed bi-polar, and I am scared of the uncertainty. Of course, I still love him after this long. But know nothing to do but NC until I see him decide totake responsibilty for his part, as I have for mine. I have never been in such a paralysing state. Link to post Share on other sites
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