Lying eyes Posted October 31, 2009 Share Posted October 31, 2009 After recently (2 months) of re-breaking up I found another lie she and her mother have conspired. Basically she told her mother to call me (she didn't have a cell phone) and tell me that she had to go to the hospital because her back was hurting. This happened the day after we broke up, when she was supposed to see the kids. I have checked the medical insurance and nothing has gone through. Medical companies never wait this long to get their money. I'm troubled by this mostly because the lie involved her not seeing our kids. My question is, how do I confront her about the possible lie? If she did lie, I don't think I can coparent with her on the same level we are currently doing, but this might hurt the kids. We're trying to do family activities once a week, I'm watching the kids next weekend so she can have an activity, I'm unemployed so I'm watching them during the week while she works. I can be a real dick if I want and insist on a 50% split, which would mean she needs to get childcare during half of the week she works (she cannot afford), I can refuse to babysit for her, and stop seeing each other as a family. How can I continue do go out of my way for her, not knowing if half the things she says are lies? I feel like she needs to see consequences to her lying. Oh by the way, lying is a big deal to me. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted October 31, 2009 Share Posted October 31, 2009 Why not go for 100% custody and hit her for CS and alimony too? If she's a liar she can do it on her own nickel, not yours and the kids. She can see how much a judge likes her lies You mediated a generous settlement. There's a time an a place to draw a line in the sand. That time and place have arrived. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lying eyes Posted November 3, 2009 Author Share Posted November 3, 2009 I confronted her about it a couple of days ago. She said she doesn't know why it never went through the insurance, but she'll call and find out what's going on. Then she calls me and says she just remembered, she paid cash for the appointment, and that she didn't run it through insurance, she just paid cash for everything. I know that's bogus because she doesn't have that kind of money to be paying cash, when she could just pay the $20 copay, rather than whatever their typical services would cost. I told her I don't believe that story and told her she was lying to me. She insisted that it doesn't matter and I am just trying to control her. I tried explaining that I don't care what she does with her time, but I expect honesty from her when our children are involved. When she says she has to go to the hospital and can't be on the kids, when she is really not sick and doing something else, it affects my trust in her as a coparent. She just doesn't get it. I feel like I want to go after her now for all the money I loaned her, and make her pay for 50% of everything with the kids. Even if she asks for child support, it would be less than what I am already paying for medical insurance and child care. I am pissed, but also hurt that she would destroy our thus far amicable separation with more lies and deceit. Link to post Share on other sites
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