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How to cope while living in same house.


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I filed for divorce at the end of 2006. It amazes me that we our divorce is still not final. Its more than ridiculous! My stbx fired his attorney early on so things got slow. We are near the end though. I've been to two final hearings with the judge asking for something unexpected each time. The last time it was an affidavit from a doctor to justify child support beyond the age of majority for one of our children. Our house will either be ordered sold (a terrible time to sell) or my stbx will have to pay the mortgage and let us live here while he moves out. Knowing him this will cause his blood to boil. He's cheap. At the same time I don't see moving out because our child needs a place that is wheelchair accessible. The places I've seen were really tight or not accessible. Up till now he has kept his emotional abuse to a minimum for fear he'll have to leave. All that keeps me sane is knowing that this will be final any minute.

Once its final how will I get him out and will he continue to pay the mortgage? I suggested we get the payments to as low as we can get them so he can manage. The alternative is for him to continue to live upstairs like a roommate. I still cook etc. since I'm not working outside the home. When our child was younger childcare was great and I worked full time. Now its a nightmare. Whenever I've tried to work the caregivers and agencies are were not reliable and I had to scramble back home. Its too exhausting. Juggling is not good. I have no boyfriend or plans to get one so it would work with us living here unless he gets abusive. He was never physical but building up to it (shoving) when I filed. I'm wary.

There seem to be a lot of couples doing the roommate arrangement after divorcing. Are there any professionals (counselors, attorneys etc.) out there who can give some insight into this. This is all so strange.

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