TrustInYourself Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Faceplant, did you faceplant again? I'm curious if you are still out there being a hero. I don't know but I've been handling this separation for a month now. You've been doing this for 6 months. I'm not sure I could live through 6 months of this up and down ****. LOL. Link to post Share on other sites
Billy Bob Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Meh, I don't know... It's painful to watch Faceplant. I hate to be rude, trying to wake the guy up. Maybe some have to get dragged through the mud longer than others.. Really, when you have gone through it, and are able to comprehend that losing a woman who decides she wants to leave, ends up being best for you - you become enlightened. It's really hard to comprehend that life ends up being better without them.. I guess so many couples are co-dependant, so many of these guys can't comprehend that they can't control anothers feelings no matter how much they try. It's like a describing sight to a blind man. I know Woogle and Gunny and a few others know what I'm talking about. You get to the point where you know if your GF or spouse left you, her loss, NEXT! OK, I'm just babbling now! Link to post Share on other sites
Gunny376 Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Meh, I don't know... It's painful to watch Faceplant. I hate to be rude, trying to wake the guy up. Maybe some have to get dragged through the mud longer than others.. Really, when you have gone through it, and are able to comprehend that losing a woman who decides she wants to leave, ends up being best for you - you become enlightened. It's really hard to comprehend that life ends up being better without them.. I guess so many couples are co-dependant, so many of these guys can't comprehend that they can't control anothers feelings no matter how much they try. It's like a describing sight to a blind man. I know Woogle and Gunny and a few others know what I'm talking about. You get to the point where you know if your GF or spouse left you, her loss, NEXT! OK, I'm just babbling now! Once you've been through it? You build up an inmuminity to it. Woman leaves ya? See Ya! Link to post Share on other sites
faceplant Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Faceplant, did you faceplant again? I'm curious if you are still out there being a hero. I don't know but I've been handling this separation for a month now. You've been doing this for 6 months. I'm not sure I could live through 6 months of this up and down ****. LOL. Still here, TIY, still doing my thing - and succeeding, and still having a blast with it. Hang in there, my friend - if you still believe in your goal. Link to post Share on other sites
youngbuckkk Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Still here, TIY, still doing my thing - and succeeding, and still having a blast with it. Hang in there, my friend - if you still believe in your goal. What's the measure of success today? Perhaps she gave you a hug? Maybe spent an extra couple minutes talking to you after getting offline with her man? I'm curious. Link to post Share on other sites
Author TrustInYourself Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 How nice. What's it like be completely cynical about love? Real love is loving someone even if they don't want to be with you. Real love is wanting their happiness above your own. Ponder that and get back to me. Maybe FP love his wife and needs to understand that maybe his pain and struggles are worth something other than heartache. This is a support site. Start supporting people, rather than trying to tear down their efforts at happiness. Maybe you don't agree with everything they say or feel or do, but that doesn't mean you should criticize them. Link to post Share on other sites
0hpenelope Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 How nice. What's it like be completely cynical about love? Real love is loving someone even if they don't want to be with you. Real love is wanting their happiness above your own. Ponder that and get back to me. Maybe FP love his wife and needs to understand that maybe his pain and struggles are worth something other than heartache. This is a support site. Start supporting people, rather than trying to tear down their efforts at happiness. Maybe you don't agree with everything they say or feel or do, but that doesn't mean you should criticize them. There we go. Self-sacrifice. Not everyone on this world is strong enough to do such a thing. Faceplant, I've been following your thread. Keep doing your thing. I'm quite disappointed to see some of the posters whose perspectives I've come to respect come and attack. You're going to realize what you're supposed to realize in the long run. I don't come bearing advice. Just support. Good luck to you. Link to post Share on other sites
allthingsarepossible Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 [sIZE=2]Faceplant, Let me first commend you on the fight you are taking on your story is an inspiration to all of us in a similar situation. While I have not read the sources that you are using, I am using a more faith-based approach, which is surprisingly very similar to what you are reading. I don’t want to go quoting scripture, as this is not the forum for that but be assured that most of what you are saying (except for dating other people of course) and can be traced back to the bible. My situation, while different to yours is in many ways similar. "About a month ago, I expressed regret to my wife that she and I did not have more time together - and her response was to tell me that she was doing what made her happy, and that if she wasn't giving me enough, I should stop asking." Sounds like your wife and mine have been talking… While I have no solid evidence that there is an OM I do have my suspicions. But when you come right down to it you are right, the more you show displeasure with the situation the more she will move away from you and to him. Keep at it and fight the good fight. I look forward to your posts. And don’t listen to those who criticize your efforts, as they are where you were six months ago and I’m sure you do not want to back there. God bless [/sIZE] Link to post Share on other sites
m3szyman Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 I think that all the guys beating on faceplant are missing the point. It is not about his wife. He is changing who he is. This is a very deep transformation that may (or may not) give him back his love but will for sure make him a mature, confident and happy man that many other women will desire and admire. At the end he will be the winner (and not the sad whiner). Link to post Share on other sites
badbrit Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 I am sorry but it is the cheerleaders who are missing the point. He is not changing who he is and transforming, he is trying to change for someone else and that never works. He feels that he has found a path and method to get his ex back with him and is doing things for that result. He is no different to how he has always been because he is dependant on her for his happiness. He does things and says things and she gives him a crumb and he is happy. What happens if she does rejects him again? What happens when or if she says, "I can see you have changed and are making an effort but it does not change things for me, I am not in love with you?" The whole house of cards of his "transformation" comes crashing down. Real love is loving someone even if they don't want to be with you. Real love is wanting their happiness above your own. Yes it is and this is not real love. If it was any of what you just wrote then someone spoke of not everyone is capable of such self-sacrifice then he would not be posting that he did A and she said or responded with B and that was good. It would be I did A and it made me feel good. Look, all of this is totally for someone else, dependant on someone else. Of course everyone here will be keeping fingers crossed for faceplant, maybe he will be the one to make this work, just saying got to be wary as some of it is not healthy and is creating problems for the future even if they do get back together. Link to post Share on other sites
allthingsarepossible Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking. It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. Link to post Share on other sites
Billy Bob Posted June 4, 2008 Share Posted June 4, 2008 Still here, TIY, still doing my thing - and succeeding, and still having a blast with it. Hang in there, my friend - if you still believe in your goal. How is the succeeding going? Haven't heard much since the wife went off on the busness trip with the OM.. right? Still trying to coddle the biotch? Link to post Share on other sites
Author TrustInYourself Posted June 4, 2008 Author Share Posted June 4, 2008 Update please. Link to post Share on other sites
Lookingforward Posted June 6, 2008 Share Posted June 6, 2008 How is the succeeding going? Haven't heard much since the wife went off on the busness trip with the OM.. right? Still trying to coddle the biotch? you have your threads confused - it wasn't FP's W that was going off on a business trip with the OM - she's never met him Link to post Share on other sites
Billy Bob Posted June 9, 2008 Share Posted June 9, 2008 Ooops, yeah maybe I have my threads confused.. but.. this thread has been pretty much wiped out by the data loss Link to post Share on other sites
Lookingforward Posted June 9, 2008 Share Posted June 9, 2008 Ooops, yeah maybe I have my threads confused.. but.. this thread has been pretty much wiped out by the data loss yeah... there's more than a few that don't really make a whole lot of sense anymore Link to post Share on other sites
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