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If you still love someone should you tell them?


MusicLova

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If she broke up with you, telling her you still love her won't change anything. She broke up because she no longer loves you.

 

If you broke up with her you can tell her if you want to reconcile. She might not trust you since you broke her heart but if you don't tell her you definitely won't be able to fix things.

 

When Ceresi suggested you would look silly s/he meant that chasing somebody who doesn't want you is counterproductive. The more you express interest, the farther & faster they run away.

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When Ceresi suggested you would look silly s/he meant that chasing somebody who doesn't want you is counterproductive. The more you express interest, the farther & faster they run away.

 

Exactly. It will do no good.

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No. Take my word it will change nothing and when it doesn't you'll feel even worse about the situation. Keep it to yourself and let her come to you if she misses you instead.

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Generally speaking, I think there are two points where a guy who a woman has dated is at his least appealing:

 

1) Right after she breaks up with him, assuming it's been a while coming and wasn't because he cheated or something like that.

2) Right after she meets someone else who intrigues here.

 

Not saying you don't stand a chance some day, though I'd probably move on anyway, but you pretty much have no chance during the above two times. And that's when declarations are most likely to hold little meaning, which is ironic, since I think that's when a lot of guys make them.

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  • 3 weeks later...
I am a man she is a woman.

 

We broke up 2 weeks ago but I cant stop thinking about her.

 

Who broke up with who? What was the reasons behind the break up?

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Who broke up with who? What was the reasons behind the break up?

 

Yes OP, can you give a little more background on this? What was the cause of the break up? Were you at fault? Was she at fault? To me it doesn't matter who was the dumper or the dumpee.....dumpers can regret choices and wants reconciliation, and dumpees can remain resilient and choose to walk away for good. It all depends on how big your responsibility is for for the downfall. if you're at fault and you can admit and own up to it, then you can start there.

 

I'm going to go against the grain here and say something different, because I think lots of people here are quick to say leave, forget, and move on. We have all been there: been hurt, got up and left, found happy endings, yadi-yada. I get it all....I've been there too...and I don't doubt the power of moving on at all. But I bet you that all of us would have loved to hear our exes own up to their mistakes, get the courage to at least try to acknowledge our heartaches, and gave us the choice to forgive them even if it doesn't lead to reconciliation. I'm not saying it's gonna get you the ending you want....it may not, she may not even be open to it.....but I'm saying there's no regret in trying if that's what you really want. You're already broken up. You could not have made this any worse than you have. If it's meant to be, she'll forgive you and you'll reconcile. If not, then you're right where you are without her. Are you afraid of setbacks? Why? You not being able to stop thinking about her is a constant setback all on it's own anyway, so why not go big and see where it leads you?

 

Just my opinion. You know your relationship better than anyone, and if you think reaching out to her will at least.....if nothing else.....give you closure, then maybe it's worth a shot.

Edited by PolyPocket
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I agree with PolyPocket.

Before marrying my wife we first broke up.

Someone told me that she is meeting with a nice guy, a womanizer, from our neighborhood. I was shocked, asked her to meet and wrote her several letters.

She gave me a second chance and later we got married.

Our marriage continued 10 years and we have a daughter.

 

There are always exceptions which prove the rule.

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If she broke up with you, it's done. She doesn't really care if you have feelings or not if she doesn't reciprocate them. So all it does is make you look desperate and even less appealing to go begging after them.

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If you’re loved by someone you know it. There’s no need for words because it’s felt through the heart.

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  • 2 weeks later...
If you’re loved by someone you know it. There’s no need for words because it’s felt through the heart.

 

Would you say it's possible to love someone and still break up with them?

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