tikay00 Posted October 15, 2014 Share Posted October 15, 2014 Girl dumps boy. Boy dumps girl. Second chance with ex GF. Second chance with ex BF. Tell me if I'm generally right. Girl dumps boy, she's been planning for weeks and months on end. It's pretty much over for good. Boy dumps girl, he might have been planning, or he might have been scared of commitment, and he'll most likely come back. Ex GF is more hesitant of the second chance, and most likely doesn't happen, while only wanting friend zone. Ex BF will call in 2 weeks, and beg his way back to girl he dumped. OBVIOUSLY this is generalizing to the highest degree, but I'm just asking if this is GENERALLY the case. Ex. Guys like sports, and cars, girls like shoes, and romantic movies. Obviously a generalization, but in a general sense, mostly true. I ask all this because I think certain people give the wrong advice to people, because of their own particular situation, and the gender they are. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tikay00 Posted October 15, 2014 Author Share Posted October 15, 2014 Girl dumps boy. Boy dumps girl. Second chance with ex GF. Second chance with ex BF. Tell me if I'm generally right. Girl dumps boy, she's been planning for weeks and months on end. It's pretty much over for good. Boy dumps girl, he might have been planning, or he might have been scared of commitment, and he'll most likely come back. Ex GF is more hesitant of the second chance, and most likely doesn't happen, while only wanting friend zone. Ex BF will call in 2 weeks, and beg his way back to girl he dumped. OBVIOUSLY this is generalizing to the highest degree, but I'm just asking if this is GENERALLY the case. Ex. Guys like sports, and cars, girls like shoes, and romantic movies. Obviously a generalization, but in a general sense, mostly true. I ask all this because I think certain people give the wrong advice to people, because of their own particular situation, and the gender they are. Link to post Share on other sites
ThorntonMelon Posted October 15, 2014 Share Posted October 15, 2014 I think generic generalizations aren't worth much. There are men and women who behave in different ways. What is consistent here is advice to 1)value your needs 2)respect your needs 3)refuse to accept being less than a priority to the people you make a priority. That advice is gender-neutral. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
rawrrxlaurr Posted October 15, 2014 Share Posted October 15, 2014 It definitely has everything to do with the specific situation, and not the gender. Link to post Share on other sites
hedyo Posted October 15, 2014 Share Posted October 15, 2014 I think there is some truth to it, even though it is obviously a generalization. Personally, I've only dumped guys when it's been WAY overdue, and then I'm 100% done. Meanwhile, the guys who've dumped me have often done so on impulse, and then regretted it later. There will always be exceptions, though. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted October 15, 2014 Share Posted October 15, 2014 Yeah the original post seems pretty much spot on. If the woman is the dumper, the relationship is over forever. The guy dumper may or may not come back. Also in cases where people are having sex with their "ex" it's almost always a situation where the guy was the dumper. I can't imagine a woman dumping her boyfriend, and continuing to have sex with him. Link to post Share on other sites
HeartbrokenNewbie Posted October 15, 2014 Share Posted October 15, 2014 I do think there is something in this x I think women tend to take their time to ensure ending the RS is the right thing, whereas I think men can knew jerk react& later regret.. This does not mean everyone is the same but I do think there is something in it x Link to post Share on other sites
lauri Posted October 15, 2014 Share Posted October 15, 2014 I hold this thought as well. However, it doesn't mean that a guy is going to regain interest in a girl he ended it with. This is why I think when the interest level is lost in a girl it is lost forever. But, maybe I just tell myself that so I never go back into anything with someone who would hurt me so badly and play with my emotions. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tikay00 Posted October 15, 2014 Author Share Posted October 15, 2014 I hold this thought as well. However, it doesn't mean that a guy is going to regain interest in a girl he ended it with. This is why I think when the interest level is lost in a girl it is lost forever. But, maybe I just tell myself that so I never go back into anything with someone who would hurt me so badly and play with my emotions. But then it's weird. My ex said she hasn't fallen out of love with me, and is still in love with me (see my thread about her Tumblr post). She's just scared of getting broken hearted again. She dumped me. Bread crumbs??? Link to post Share on other sites
Author tikay00 Posted October 15, 2014 Author Share Posted October 15, 2014 I do think there is something in this x I think women tend to take their time to ensure ending the RS is the right thing, whereas I think men can knew jerk react& later regret.. This does not mean everyone is the same but I do think there is something in it x Mine was a knee jerk reaction, and I didn't beg back, but I had to come at her completely humble, and profess my love. I didn't have to, because she most likely would've taken me back, but I felt it was the only way to do it. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 15, 2014 Share Posted October 15, 2014 I think heat of the moment break ups as a way of ending a fight between immature people with poor conflict resolution skills can result in reconciliation but that certainly doesn't make them healthy relationships. If the breakup was thought through & for valid reasons, there is no sense in getting back together because the relationship was fundamentally flawed. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tikay00 Posted October 15, 2014 Author Share Posted October 15, 2014 I think heat of the moment break ups as a way of ending a fight between immature people with poor conflict resolution skills can result in reconciliation but that certainly doesn't make them healthy relationships. The first few "breaks" with my ex. And I'm not just saying this, but she HONESTLY could not admit her mistakes, and was allergic to talking about problems when she didn't want to. Huge reason why I convince myself, she's not a good long term partner. If the breakup was thought through & for valid reasons, there is no sense in getting back together because the relationship was fundamentally flawed. The final breakup with my ex. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tikay00 Posted October 15, 2014 Author Share Posted October 15, 2014 (edited) It definitely has everything to do with the specific situation, and not the gender. You see, now you're generalizing on epic levels. I think gender has a whole ton of a lot to do with the situation. That's kind of why I read certain female posts on certain threads, and I can immediately spot if that's not going to help me at all, just because of the mental mindset of the post, and the fact they're not in my "man shoes". lol Edited October 15, 2014 by tikay00 Link to post Share on other sites
hedyo Posted October 15, 2014 Share Posted October 15, 2014 I can't imagine a woman dumping her boyfriend, and continuing to have sex with him. I'm a woman, and I've done this... But just once in a while, and I wasn't that into it. Our break-up was fairly easy and we remained friends, so it wasn't a big deal. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tikay00 Posted October 15, 2014 Author Share Posted October 15, 2014 I'm a woman, and I've done this... But just once in a while, and I wasn't that into it. Our break-up was fairly easy and we remained friends, so it wasn't a big deal. It's because he was a Stallion, and you couldn't tame him, but you still wanted some of that good ol Stallion lovin......amirite? Link to post Share on other sites
hedyo Posted October 15, 2014 Share Posted October 15, 2014 It's because he was a Stallion, and you couldn't tame him, but you still wanted some of that good ol Stallion lovin......amirite? Nope, I was just drunk and bored. Oh well! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author tikay00 Posted October 15, 2014 Author Share Posted October 15, 2014 Nope, I was just drunk and bored. Oh well! :laugh: Link to post Share on other sites
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