I saw my ex.. it's like we never broke up

[EuTuBrute]

Hey guys, my head is spinning and i need some advice.

 

I dated my ex gf for 2.5 years. Knew each other for 5 years. She asked for a break, we broke up. It devastated me.

 

Fast forward a year later, i run into at a bar and we hit it off like we never broke up. She ended up coming back to my apartment, where we talked all night and ended up cuddling (nothing more happened). We talked about how we missed each other and our families.

 

The next morning when taking her back to her apartment, she said, "why do i have the feeling like we are going to date again."

 

A few more texts later in week, i asked her to dinner sometime and she said "Yes. id like that!"

 

My question however is, am i making a mistake?. The girl broke my heart, and like a sucker, i still love her. Do second chances really work? Am I a fool?

[Nimbus4dt]

I believe they do, although not had or needed a second chance before although curiously I'd love a second chance with my ex.

I think it has everything to do with how and why you broke up, the reasons.

I reacted badly to a situation that was presented to me because I panicked. I would expect never to repeat that happening again so I believe that if she'd have me, we'd work well, much better than before.

Just be positive, things will slot into place I'm sure, as with all things in life there is risk, just got to weigh it up, pros and cons.

Hope it goes well for you!

[TaraMaiden]

.....

My question however is, am i making a mistake?. The girl broke my heart, and like a sucker, i still love her. Do second chances really work? Am I a fool?

 

Have either or both of you consciously worked on the things that broke you up in the first place, last time?

Are there still unresolved issues, unanswered questions?

 

Think about those, before you rush headlong into this. Remember what they say:

"Those who cannot remember the past are destined to repeat it."

 

Remind yourself of what exactly messed up your relationship last time - and work on making sure you don't repeat it.

[Simon Phoenix]

It's been a year, so who knows. I agree with Tara -- make sure whatever killed the first go-round is fixed on your part and look for signs of evolution on her part. But if you went a year without speaking (or at least most of that year), you might have reset your feelings.

 

I had something like this happen to me several years ago, I didn't see an ex for a year, ran into her and it was like we had first met -- all the butterflies, all the attraction, all the intrigue. I stepped back, realized that I didn't want to go down that rabbit hole again (the breakup was an especially bad one) and I decided not to pursue. But I know of others who have reconciled and it took after an extended period of NC.

 

I would take it as it comes. Just be aware of what's going on.

[EuTuBrute]

I got my second chance. We saw each other for 5 months.

 

Guess what... it ended up like the first time

 

We went through the "honeymoon" period and boom same problems.

 

If you get a second chance with your ex, please discuss the problems head on.

 

Don't think that just because they miss you and say they love you it will work again.