Would she regret?

[jusified]

Hi Guys,

 

I know that it doesn't matter if my ex-girlfriend regrets breaking up with me but I still like to get a view from other people.

 

I treated my ex great but she went on a trip and fell for another guy who was hitting on her and she came back and said she feels like we don't have things in common and just left me. I am 21 and she is 20 and we were together for nearly 2 years.

 

From what i see I knwo she will not work out with this new guy if they do get together in the future becauseit was a very rash and spontaneous thing. I know girls her age do this confused and ran off with a new guy just to see what its like (I'm her first real boyfriend) but its just so hard for me atm specilly wih the holidayscoming up.

 

Please give me some responses and just talk to me about it.

[anto0o]

Dont talk to her for a while...what shes going through right now is most likely a fling...girls are so easly perswayed its not even funny...my ex left me because someone filled her gas tank and opened her door....=/...1 month later he dropped her like a bad habit and is on my strap...but i push her away...i know its madddddddddddddddddddddd hard for u right now...but just make believe she didn't exist...and as for the holidays ucould buy me something =p

[ultimon]

justified,

 

I've read your other post and I just wanna say that I'm in the same situation as you. I've been nothing but nice to my ex of 2 years, and 2 months ago, she decided to break up with me because she needed her space. I'm 22 and she's 20.

 

I later found out that she's been traveling out of town, partying and going on boat cruises. Something also tells me that she's seeing another guy too.

 

Devastating isn't it? We are heart broken while they go out and have fun. But I guess they are just trying really hard to get over us.

 

For me, I just stick with NC and try to move on...

IMO, it's not likely that she'll regret her decision,

unless she hooks up with some ahole, gets hurt and realize how nice we were to them... but that's highly unlikely

[jusified]

I guess its hard to take tht she can just all of a sudden be interested in someone else.

 

But I suppose if you are feeling down on the relationship and some Joe Blows comes over and start to show interest there is an intial Attraction.

 

Pffft, I'm getting over it and I know shes over it already and not thinkingabout it at all.

 

I still would like some female views on this please.

[westernxer]

I guess its hard to take tht she can just all of a sudden be interested in someone else.

 

It's easy to accept, once you understand she's 20.

[Guest]

my 2 cents

 

i don't think saying she will regret leaving you is something she is thinking about right now and maybe this new guy is someone that will treat her better than you did. besides, its none of yer business now, just be happy that she has healed and found someone that makes her happy and if fate brings you both back together that's great but don't expect it. just live yer life and keep things simple - and maybe angels will make contact with u.

[jusified]

LOL, good point

[Guest]

Well, I'm a girl and was once 20. Gosh I was stupid.

 

I am sure, actually I would put money on it. That you have not heard the last of her.

 

However, again, she is young, free and stupid. I am 36 and still think and yes regret not being a better person with my ex from college. I call him the greatest love of my life, unfortunately for me I didn't get it until 8 years later and a final goodbye. He did in his parting make me a better person so I do thank him for that. We had developed a pattern you see though and it had to be broken for us both to grow up.

 

You have to really think about what you want, and how you will respond when you do hear from her. Don't worry you will. They always come back.

 

You don't want to be that great guy she calls every time she gets her heart broken. You don't want to be her safety net. Hey, you just may have to be her life lesson.

 

Let her fall, it might be the absolute best thing you could do for her. But again she won't know this until years later. Maybe then you two might have a shot. Tell her to call you when she is 30, that is if your still available.

 

In the meantime, go find yourself ....you, and you will attract another cutie. Stop trying to prove how awesome you are, you know you treated her well. This means that you have the capacity to love someone and treat them well (not everyone has this, especially when young), this may be your gift, your acknowlegment of that.

 

I would just like to say....as a woman...don't let her damage you. Stay sweet, stay that good boyfriend (there are not enough of your kind), don't let her define all women and become an excuse to cross over. Stay yourself and keep your integrity.

 

Besides, your what 21. You have a whole lifetime of drama waiting to unfold. Enjoy the journey.

 

Peace.

[jusified]

yea a whole life of drama LOL.

 

I know exactly what you are saying, and sometimes it just sucks that people don't see things untill they experience it.

 

I know this girl inside out, She even told me that I've always supported her, been there for her when she gets into a little trouble, and I was a fun to be with and flirty person (only with her) which made her feel special.

 

I have not contacted her since and will let her experience things for herself. Maybe we won't be together again (which is how I a feeling atm) but I know withthis experience and the relationship we had, when she looks back now or even in a few years she will realise she has learnt a lesson and become a better person .

 

Thanks guest, some times I just need to vent the frustration, I do agree with everything you said and I do hope things go well for you and myself .

 

Of cause, if shes happy who am I to say she would or should regret anything.... moving on is just a little hard, still thinks about all this stuff all the time

[jusified]

Just an update, this girl writes a group "merry x-mas" email to all her buddies and includes me on the list. Then writes "2007 has past, but a fresh one with heaps of opportunities and fun awaits".

 

She's been sending group mails to me saying how much of a good time shes having and I think shes either doing this to hurt me more or someone needs to put sense into her.

 

Urggghhhhhh.......

[Rooster_DAR]

Hi Guys,

 

I know that it doesn't matter if my ex-girlfriend regrets breaking up with me but I still like to get a view from other people.

 

I treated my ex great but she went on a trip and fell for another guy who was hitting on her and she came back and said she feels like we don't have things in common and just left me. I am 21 and she is 20 and we were together for nearly 2 years.

 

From what i see I knwo she will not work out with this new guy if they do get together in the future becauseit was a very rash and spontaneous thing. I know girls her age do this confused and ran off with a new guy just to see what its like (I'm her first real boyfriend) but its just so hard for me atm specilly wih the holidayscoming up.

 

Please give me some responses and just talk to me about it.

 

Age may be a factor here, but it's not always the factor. My recent EX is 34 years old and she did the same thing. She went out state to work for several months, when she returned I was handed my hat and replaced with one of her co-workers. Talking about a stab in the back, after 5 years of treating her well.

[daphne]

justified,

 

Age is a factor, but it's also her character. You're getting a little preview of what her character is like. She'll regret it, but it could be a long time before that happens. My ex husband of 14 years is still writing. Another ex figured out he made a mistake about 3 years later. By then, it was far too late and I had completely fallen out of love with him. I figured if he could move on without me 3 years prior, he wasn't meant for me. He still hasn't let it go and that's been about 8 years.

 

Yes, they usually come back. But by that time, you will have so moved on and for a reason. You know that the person who was meant for you wouldn't let you go for a second.

[D-Lish]

Another 30+ woman's perspective...

I too was a dumbass when I was 20.

 

It's such an exciting and confusing time. One thing's for sure- there's that constant nag to experience life to the fullest, figure out who you are, where you fit in. I didn't get my act together until I was 30.

 

I left some nice guys in the dust that I went on to regret years later. But I'm going to echo what guest said. Don't let this experience jade you. I now look for "nice" guys. I have no time whatsoever for boys, or men with ego's and the jack-ass syndrome. Any woman worth her weight in gold will seek a nice guy.

[Rooster_DAR]

Another 30+ woman's perspective...

I too was a dumbass when I was 20.

 

It's such an exciting and confusing time. One thing's for sure- there's that constant nag to experience life to the fullest, figure out who you are, where you fit in. I didn't get my act together until I was 30.

 

I left some nice guys in the dust that I went on to regret years later. But I'm going to echo what guest said. Don't let this experience jade you. I now look for "nice" guys. I have no time whatsoever for boys, or men with ego's and the jack-ass syndrome. Any woman worth her weight in gold will seek a nice guy.

 

That is good to know.

[D-Lish]

It's the truth:p

 

I can smell a player a mile away and I have no time for it.

Nor would I ever cheat on someone I professed to love.

 

Rooster, I can tell from your posts that you're a little jaded from your experience (who wouldn't be). But there are nice girls out there looking for an honest, nice guy. Don't let your experience with your ex destroy that part of you.

 

D

[Rooster_DAR]

It's the truth:p

 

I can smell a player a mile away and I have no time for it.

Nor would I ever cheat on someone I professed to love.

 

Rooster, I can tell from your posts that you're a little jaded from your experience (who wouldn't be). But there are nice girls out there looking for an honest, nice guy. Don't let your experience with your ex destroy that part of you.

 

D

 

Perhaps, but I am an intelligent man and I know when I should let go of resentment. I'm still at an early stage of coping with my ordeal, once I get past the memories I will be good to go. Besides, if I close up too much I won't get to enjoy the next babe in my life, and that's not fair to her or me.

 

[D-Lish]

True to d'at.

(slang) lol.

 

I'm not bitter, I'm just plain sad. I wish I could move to bitter.

In your situation I'd be resentful too. She did a number on you, then came back and tried to do it again. I guess I'm lucky my ex won't acknowledge me. If he did contact me, I know he'd be able to pull my strings like a puppet. So I guess I'm better off having him hate me.

 

Cheers RD,

Merry x-mas to ya.

Dee

[stanchain]

Hey... dar... D-lish is right bro... dont be bitter.. I mean you have commented on a lot of my threads... and you see I am not bitter... I mean I think i knew from the begining it wouldnt work. I mean we were just different. I was older, she was younger... I am black, she is mexican/white... I am an aries... and she is a lying woman that is dating some 17 year old bus boy after i treated her like a queen for 3 years... But I am not bitter. In fact if you see her let her know that I said.. .hello... hope your busboy falls off a rollercoaster and breaks every bone in his body (and lives). hahahahahahaha... wait did I meantion I used to do stand up comedy. that joke is so much funnier on stage. but really we have to try and not be bitter. because like D-lish said.... I am sure that there is some really good women out there looking for good men. And although I can say I am not perfect... I would like to think I am a good man. and not to sound gay or anything of that nature dar... but from what i have read about you... you are too...

[jusified]

Everyone is still looking for the right one LOL,

 

Alot of gals say that they can smell a player... thats not true and you all know it.

 

Well this forum has helped me heaps as it seems this is the place I can vent and get support so thanks guys/gals.

 

I suppose regrets are just regrets, whats done is done and there is no going back but moving forward.

 

RD we are all jaded from these experieces, but we know better then just moaning over it, pick ourselves up and keep our integrity.

[stanchain]

Hey Just,

Sorry that i got on your thread and just vented... I am kinda go through it too bro. I ask myself the same question every day. And well i just started NC a few days back and such. But the one thing that I always wonder is does she miss me... does she regret leaving? Well last time I talked to her she said a big part of her regrets leaving. I mean she said it too me.. .but does she regret enough to come back.. not exactly. and that is the thing. Me and you and the rest of the guys/gals on here.... we miss and a lot of us wish we could make things better. We regret the mistakes we have made... we regret them enough to try and learn what we did wrong so we can fix it and try to make things work... but what I am seeing is the only way to answer your question... they will regret it.. but not regret it enough to come back... or enough to make us feel better

[jusified]

well I wanted my name to be Justified, but some how I missed out on the "t" and it seems no body has ever noticed which is good.

 

Yea man Hi Jack my thread...nah its cool, I'm happy to hear other ppl vent since I know how it feels when I want to vent and no one is around. We are all here for you in the "Love shAck baby" (such a hip song)

 

If you only have been in no contact for a few days then it must still be hard. Dont worry too much and just post here, there is no need to have emotion or small talk with the Ex.

 

It don;t really matter if my ex regrets or not anymore, why should it? what's done is done and what she does with herself is up to her. I do hope she becomes a better person and grow up but other then that I need to improve my self and find my self a Cutie that treats me good

[jusified]

For some reason, I know this girl won't regret.

She's done lot of things that hurt me, but she has always rationalised and put a twisted logic to it in her own mind to give her self reasons to do i.

 

GRRRR

[simon sez]

You are missing one important ingredient in getting her back..

 

START DATING other women. Women don't come back until they feel

you have moved on. Throw a little "jealousy" into the mix. Let her find out that you have been seen around town with someone else hanging on your arm. Men who are successful with women are confident. When she calls you tell her thanks for calling but you are just running out the door and will call her back. (Then don't call back) Make her come pounding on your door.

Stand up and get a backbone. Women are attracted to men with strength

and act like they are going somewhere in life. Get busy and start dating. You may even find someone you like even better.....

[jusified]

LOL I am a confident, funny and charming (in a bizzar way though) guy. However, I don't just want to date other women to get her back. I don't want to get her back, I want to set my bar high so I can be with a girl that I deserve and deserves me.

 

Anyways, shes in the northern hemisphere for 6 month and I'm in the southern Hemisphere so I doubt she will know what I'm doing anyways. I'm just saying alot of stuff to get my feelings out. I am really hurting and a bit cut at times about how she treated me when I've been really good to her. I know I had my faults but they were little and far in between that could hav been fixed if she just communicated, instead she was always selfish and inconsiderate untill the very end. Errrrrrrrr, it's orite, I'm trying to stop thinking about her and the badthings about her and trying to speak of her and the bad things less.

[CaliGuy]

LOL I am a confident, funny and charming (in a bizzar way though) guy. However, I don't just want to date other women to get her back. I don't want to get her back, I want to set my bar high so I can be with a girl that I deserve and deserves me.

 

Anyways, shes in the northern hemisphere for 6 month and I'm in the southern Hemisphere so I doubt she will know what I'm doing anyways. I'm just saying alot of stuff to get my feelings out. I am really hurting and a bit cut at times about how she treated me when I've been really good to her. I know I had my faults but they were little and far in between that could hav been fixed if she just communicated, instead she was always selfish and inconsiderate untill the very end. Errrrrrrrr, it's orite, I'm trying to stop thinking about her and the badthings about her and trying to speak of her and the bad things less.

 

You just need to remember what I have bolded and tell yourself that every time you think of her. My ex treated me like crap because she didn't love me. And I know I will never, ever put up with that behavior towards me again. You treat me like crap, you're out of my life. No ifs, ands or buts.

 

As long as you remind yourself of that and realize that people come and go in our lives but very few "significant others" are meant to stay for a lifetime.

 

Your ex wasn't meant to stay in your life forever. Learn what you can from this, let it make you a better/stronger person and let it benefit the next woman that comes into your life.

 

Cheers.