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What's She Doing??


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I've been broken up with my ex for about 7 weeks (She broke up with me)and have been in NC for about 5 weeks. I think I've been getting better with dealing with the break-up (keeping busy, excercising etc...). I'm starting to feel as if I wouldn't want any contact from her and have resigned myself to the fact that things are over (I think). Of course, I have days when I take a step back and feel a little upset about the whole break-up and still don't understand it. Lately, I noticed I've been "glamorizing" my ex. Thinking she's doing absolutely fabulous, having the time of her life and things couldn't be better for her. I know in my mind that, it's probably not true. She's a single Mom and has been having trouble with her children right after we broke up. Her son (15 years old) broke into his high school with 2 other kids about 1 1/2 weeks after we broke up. He got caught by the Police and was facing expulsion from school (he ended up getting away with it and stayed in school). Her 13 year old daughter has been lashing out as well. I hate to say it but, her children and pretty disrespectful and spoiled. I got along with them fairly well though.

My question is: Is it common for people to look at their exes as if they are having the time of their life and we feel kinda stuck? I'm not too hung up on it but didn't know why, all of a sudden, I started thinking this way. Anybody else ever feel this?

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Yeah I would say that's a fair assumption that most people feel that way after a break-up. Almost like they couldn't possibly be missing you, and feeling lonely themselves, they are out living it up now that they are FREE! I guess thats human nature to assume the worse?

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Hi GW7417,

 

Your story is very close to my own. I also, really don't know why she left as I thougth I was providing the best for her and the kids. Sometimes it takes a person time to realize the issues that made her leave are small and not worth throwing away the relationship. NC works, if nothing else it allows you time to get strong and focused on yourself and prevents you from being a door mat!! Hang in and post a follow up!

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I believe this is very normal. Especially if you don't live close enough to her to see her and see how her life is going. Chances are, shes having just as much of a rough time as you. ESPECIALLY if shes a single mother. I am so I know for a fact her life isn't just peachy!! Just try to distract your mind, which it seems you've been doing, and eventually if you go on with NC, it will be a non issue

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I try not to think about what my ex is doing cause at the end of the day, I dont really care. As far as I can tell, she has a new boyfriend and he can have her. The more time I spend away from her, the more I realize the baggage I almost ended up with....

 

I know loves about dealing with family, and their problems.. thats not the baggage im referring too.. its the paterns of their behavior and why they do the things they do you have to analyze...

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