the_alchemyst Posted June 9, 2006 Share Posted June 9, 2006 Ok. I keep picturing my exbf hanging out with other girls at parties, dancing with them, drinking with them, dancing with them while drunk . . . and then I see him thinking this one girl (briefly: there is this girl that is a year younger than us who is one of his more recent friends. Unlike his other bastard friends, this one he did not make during HS, but rather through association of other friends. She is pretty and is a complete party girl, which lately I have been thinking is the kind of girl that he wants. She is very lively and drinks and smokes an awful lot. IMO, and not out of spite, she is a total wench--I've seen her and her behavior is really skanky. Oh, and I recently heard some other girl call her my exbf's "mistress;" yes--I almost had a heart-attack) is pretty or any other girl . . . and BAM! I see him sleeping with someone else. I simply do not know how to cope with this thought! Unfortunately, I know tonight he is going to hang out with a bunch of people, and many of them will be girls, and I just feel like he is going to be swooned by one of them or is just going to be too hormonal and--omygod! I do know, though, that if he were to hook up with someone else, under whatever circumstance, I would not be able to forgive him. By forgive I mean, were another chance out there for us, if I knew this had happened, I wouldn't be able to be with him again. Nonono. Lately I feel like I'm waiting for this to happen, not because I (subconsciously) want it to, but like I feel like it's bound to and rather soon. It makes me so furious to think that now that skanky wench is going to be hanging all over him! He'll throw me away but ohhhh, now he found a buddy buddy!! That mistress comment really got to me; I wonder if he has any feelings for her . . . . I don't know if I'm just crazy, but to think he would hook up with her now that they're going to be spending so much time together or with any other girl is just unbearable. And the thought manifested would be unforgivable. Link to post Share on other sites
fabulousgal Posted June 9, 2006 Share Posted June 9, 2006 girl i feel your pain. i have these thoughts all the time like whose he with whats he doing who is he doing .......but i guess its just natural. i just remember all the nice things i did for him that came from my heart, and tell myself that if he were smart he'd know thats worth way more than drunken hookups, fwb, etc etc Link to post Share on other sites
KittenMoon Posted June 9, 2006 Share Posted June 9, 2006 girl i feel your pain. i have these thoughts all the time like whose he with whats he doing who is he doing .......but i guess its just natural. i just remember all the nice things i did for him that came from my heart, and tell myself that if he were smart he'd know thats worth way more than drunken hookups, fwb, etc etc I second this. And I'm there with you A. I try to tell myself that what I imagine is probably worse than what is actually happening, but it doesn't help much. Link to post Share on other sites
Pink Amulet Posted June 12, 2006 Share Posted June 12, 2006 I can honestly say although my ex was unfaithful to me over 5 years. I have never had these thoughts. I try not to worry about other women. Why don't you join him at these parties? Meet these people, let them see what a lovely girl you are. Then perhaps they would back off and realise that by tempting your man they are inevitably hurting another female. Plus, you should be more involved in your boyfriends life anyway. Just ask him, "next time you go to a party, do you mind if I come along?". If he says no, and his reasons are weak (I can't actually think of any good reasons) then end it. He obviously doesn't want to you to hang out with these people for a reason... Link to post Share on other sites
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