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Missing a girl that left me for her ex ( Long text)


Jeppepp

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Hello everyone here on loveshack. Before you read I would like to mention that English isn’t my main language, so the grammar and spelling might not be perfect. I feel that I just need to write “some”. Sorry for the long text.

 

This text is about this girl that I met during a job trip in July. Worth to mention that she is 4 years older than me, she is 26 and I’m 22. We got a long great during these days and had a lot of fun. She was the one starting making moves. But I didn’t really respond that much to them because I wasn’t “that” interested at the time being.

 

Anyways nothing happened during these days even tho it was clearly she wanted something. I almost got a bit freaked out that she was so into me. But days after this I actually contacted her because i realized she actually was a real nice girl and i enjoyed hanging out with her. And we started snapchatting everyday.

 

2 weeks went until we meet next time. She, me and 2 others which I also got to know during the trip had a lunch together. It was nice. We continued chatting. I said that I was going out with a mate on Saturday night and it would be nice to meet up. She said she was going out with her friends as well so we met up. She introduced me to her friends and we had a good time. It ended with a kiss when we said goodbye. We continued talking and met up the weekend after where she introduced me to more of her close friends. We had a really nice time and we ended up in bed together at her place.

 

I stayed at her place the whole day after, we talked and had sex all day. We both said that we weren’t just looking for some sex. From then we started hanging out a lot, like 3-4 days a week. Doing different things, for example going down to the sea and watching the sunset, going out with her and her friends to the club. Things that you do when you date seriously. She really treated me as her boyfriend in public. Kisses, holding hands and so on. She also told her colleagues and parents about me. She mentioned things that she would like to do with me in the future, places to visit and so on. It really felt as if she was becoming my first real girlfriend. Worth to mention that the interest to do stuff was 50/50, I was definitely not being needy.

 

This lasted for a month aprox. One evening when we hanged out she felt a bit off, first night that we didn’t have sex. She barely even cuddled with me in bed that we always used to do. I was confused, i didn't really understand what had happened. It went from 100 to 10. After that night I thought that I should go a bit NC, and see how much she contacts me, she contacted me on Snapchat, using kisses etc. But something did still not feel right. One day went without contact. I sent a casual snap in the evening. It had gone two hours, and she had not opened it yet. Which was very unusual. I gave her a call without an answer. And sent a text to her and asked if everything was ok. She called me one hour later, 11pm. I asked her if everything was okay, she said it was, “it’s just been much things going on for me lately”. We talked for a while and as if everything was normal. She asked me questions about how my afterwork was, my cold and so on. I was the one ending the call and she said “we’ll talk tomorrow”.

 

I decided to give her space, because I knew something wasn’t right, she snapped me in the evening, nothing special, But i asked her if we should do something on Thursday, like the theaters. (This was monday) We has talked briefly about it on phone the day before, but not decided anything. She said she was going to hang out with her cousin (Whom i have met which is a good friend of hers) I was like okay you suggest date then, she replied “Sunday then”. At this point i was really sure something wasn't right. I went NC, we didn't talk more that day. But she snapped me a couple of times the day after. I replied but not with anything special. Later that day I messaged her to check on her about sunday. She didn't reply that evening but replied the morning after.

Then a not so unexpected answer came. She said she was sorry for answering so slow and so on, it would be really fun to watch a movie with you. But I need to pause things now, some stuff has come in the way and I just need to be alone and think through everything. I answered okay I understand take care, we’ll keep in touch. Went NC. 5 days later it was my bday. She wrote to me late in the evening, nothing superpersonal but it was a gratz and asked about my day. During this time I was so confused and felt like **** because I actually had developed feelings for this girl. I was suffering. I texted her and asked her what’s going on and if everything is okay and if she still wants to continue seeing me. She replied and said everything is okay I’ll call you later. She didn’t reply to my question right off.

But anyways. She texted me later that night and here came the explanation. She said she has started seeing a guy again that she had been seeing during the winter/spring for a couple of months and has decided to give another go with him. I said that I would of appreciated if you told me earlier. She answered back “I know but things wasn’t all clear first”. I didn’t answer and that was that.

 

I felt kinda used in one way and sad. I deleted her off my Snapchat, because I didn't want to see what she was up to. I posted story’s while I was having fun with friends (girl friends) and so on. I have my snap on open so everyone can see my snaps, tho i appear on her “subscriptions” since I have deleted her. She actually snapchatted me 2 weeks later. But nothing really personal. So I didn’t reply. We then almost a month later ran into each other in the parking garage, we started to talk. Nothing special at all really, we talked for 15 minutes. She talked a lot, asked me questions and so on. She didn't mention anything about our “breakup” really, until i asked her how its going with the guy she gave another chance with. She immediately said “stop…”. I was like what? She replied well it's going on good. And asked how its going on for me. I was honest and told her that i'm seeing someone too. She carried on talking. Conversation started to die out and she was just standing there leaning on my car and looking at me, I more or less said good luck with life, and then drove away ( I was sitting in the car, so no hug or anything) This was the last time we had contact, 6 weeks ago. But I see her almost every week at work, in the beginning she always looked away or down in her phone as if she didn't see me. But now the last 3 weeks its changed, I have noticed her looking/staring at me. It has happened a couple of times.

 

A couple of days ago when I was in my car on a one way road right outside our work, I see a car closing up from the other way. I decide to reverse and drive to the side just to be nice, even tho I had priority and it would of been easier if the other car waited instead. When it comes closer I see its her, she is totally staring at me so I stare back, its like if it was a staring game or something. She obviously noticed me before I noticed her since she know what car I have. She didn't move her eyes off me and she even turned her head towards me as she drove by. And not a single thanks (as almost everyone does in my country) even tho I had priority and waited for a half minute. While we both were staring no one of us showed a single face expression.

Similar situations has occurred a couple of times now.

 

This was the first girl I really started to feel for, its been hurting me a lot. And these situations does not make it better. Tho infront of her I never try to show i’m sad or upset, i'm pretty sure she thinks that I have moved on and don't care anymore which makes her not knowing where she has me. Because in her eyes she has always seen me as a very confident person, even tho im not really so confident, because then I would of let her go probably. While she isn't. She is insecure. Not to sound cocky. But I know this matters sadly and you guys might wonder. Looks-wise I look pretty good and come from a rich family, while she is more of the normal-type. Worth to mention that we are in different times in life, im going to study at university which starts this spring for 3 years. While she has just finished hers and is now looking for a solid job. She is also willing to have kids pretty soon from what I have understood. The guy she went back to is the same age as her also.

 

I felt like I probably could of showed her more love during our dating, I didn't realize how much i liked her until she left me. I don't know what to do now, just move on or ask her how she's doing? But why would I want a girl back that left me for another guy…. Because I have deep feelings for her obviously. I'm so confused….

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I was in a similar situation, except I was older and she was 26 and I'm 30. I met a girl on a trip. Everyone has most likely read my story before. If you search under my name you can see my thread.

 

It's easy to sit there and blame yourself, as I did for not making things exclusive right away. I made that same mistake if you will call it that with a girl who was 100% into me. I screwed up and gave her a rain check or told her " You're a nice girl, I really like you but I need time". To this day, I don't know why I said that other than I scared.( I was engaged a few months prior) Just like you, I developed more feelings after she decided to end things. So I found myself really emotionally invested in this girl.

 

She decided to get back with her ex, I was the odd man out and she figured why not " give him another chance". The best thing you can do honestly is not pursue her,

or contact. Seeing her in the car is kinda awkward. But might actually work in your favor, since its a subtle reminder of you. Just make it clear you're not stalking lol.

 

So in summary.

 

Do not contact, let her come back to you.

 

Don't be emotional. Let her remember the good times you guys had. If you create bad memories from a breakup, its much harder.

 

Go out and date new women. Do not put your life on hold for her.

 

Another thing to understand, she most likely had this guy in the background the whole time. At that time when you were together she might have been " testing the waters" but Women like her and the one I were dating like to keep " orbiters" or guys around. They may even block or not talk to guys for a period of time and just jump around when things go bad. I think in my opinion any respectful person would understand some people need time before diving into a relationship 100%. Maybe you and I said we didn't want one at the time, but our actions showed different because we were scared.

 

 

My lesson learned from my experience is to make sure that you explain that if you want to be exclusive there is no ex-boyfriend or guy drama in the future. That you want a partner who is stable, doesn't have a bunch of guys " orbiting around" in the background. Girls like her and the one I dated, just use guys up till they get what they want and bounce around. Maybe you did something she like, the other guy displayed traits she liked better. But eventually, she'll get tired of him too and he'll be discarded like trash also.

 

In closing, if someone wants something to workout they'll open all the doors for you. If they don't doors close.

 

Good luck friend and stay strong!

Edited by BMWN52
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For many reasons, I think you need to just let her go for good.

 

You are about to begin school, while she has already been there and done that. She has stronger feelings for her on-again boyfriend than she does for you, and she has trouble being direct and honest.

 

It was a fling, and you developed feelings for her. But it hasn't got a solid foundation for a serious relationship. Stop with the staring contests as it's just giving you false hope while she probably enjoys you lusting after her.

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Oh wow, are you me??

 

This sounds extremely similar to what I want through in the last 18 months, but that was my mistake: letting it go on for as long as it did. I blamed myself at first and thought if I'd just shown her more love when we were dating, everything would've been different. Believe me, there's nothing I could've done to change the outcome, and I spent pretty much a solid 9 months trying against better judgement and advice given to me.

 

I know it sucks, but honestly just move on and stop talking to her.

 

If she wanted to be with you, she would. End of. Nothing you do will likely change that and the fact of the matter is that she's already chosen to be with someone else. You don't need to be someone's plan b, or the bridge to their next relationship.

 

You'll save yourself a lot of pain by cutting ties and moving past this sooner rather than later.

 

Stay strong friend, I know you can't control your feelings but ride it out and you should feel a lot better for it in time.

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@ BMWN52

Im sorry that you've experienced a similar situation. It really sucks, doesnt it?

 

Anyways thanks for the input, she did indeed have this guy in the background all the time. She did actually mention that they had some contact but that she never thought anything would happen between them again (when we met in the garage). Which surprises me since she did actually let me use her phone when she was away showering for example. That made me feel like if she didnt have anything to hide and trusted me.

 

Stay strong

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@ExpatInItaly

I probably should. Very true, it hasnt got a solid foundation for a serious relationship. She has proven that I cant trust her. But at the other side, I dont want to look away when she stares since then it would be as if i have "lost". It would make me look insecure.

Edited by Jeppepp
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Oh wow, are you me??

 

This sounds extremely similar to what I want through in the last 18 months, but that was my mistake: letting it go on for as long as it did. I blamed myself at first and thought if I'd just shown her more love when we were dating, everything would've been different. Believe me, there's nothing I could've done to change the outcome, and I spent pretty much a solid 9 months trying against better judgement and advice given to me.

 

I know it sucks, but honestly just move on and stop talking to her.

 

If she wanted to be with you, she would. End of. Nothing you do will likely change that and the fact of the matter is that she's already chosen to be with someone else. You don't need to be someone's plan b, or the bridge to their next relationship.

 

You'll save yourself a lot of pain by cutting ties and moving past this sooner rather than later.

 

Stay strong friend, I know you can't control your feelings but ride it out and you should feel a lot better for it in time.

 

 

Well the fact that it sounds extremely similar to your situation is a bit creepy, jokes.

 

Might just be my brain thats playing games. But when she keeps on looking at me, it just feels like if she misses me. And doesnt have the guts to contact me, because she is afraid of that i would ditch her. Like if the relation with that guy has ended. But on the other hand, we had something, so you just dont forget that person as you never knew them.

 

So some looking and staring might just be completely normal, I dont know. But its frustrating. It was better when she looked away and pretended as if she didnt see me.

 

Cheers

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Well the fact that it sounds extremely similar to your situation is a bit creepy, jokes.

 

Might just be my brain thats playing games. But when she keeps on looking at me, it just feels like if she misses me. And doesnt have the guts to contact me, because she is afraid of that i would ditch her. Like if the relation with that guy has ended. But on the other hand, we had something, so you just dont forget that person as you never knew them.

 

So some looking and staring might just be completely normal, I dont know. But its frustrating. It was better when she looked away and pretended as if she didnt see me.

 

Cheers

 

I felt the same way, I drove 1,000 miles to another state like an idiot on a mission to " fix things". At that point, I wasn't blocked but I casually told her I was in town. She actually responded with a happy emoji at first and seemed happy to talk to me after 3 weeks of no contact. At the advice of a dating coach, I suggested we meet up for drinks. She and I talked on Whatsapp, she gave me the whole " You're a nice guy, you really are and I hate saying this. But You're not the one for me". I was crushed.. Very lonely and sobering experience not being able to see her after driving that far. No drinks, or meetup or last goodbyes. Eventually, she did block me and I haven't talked to her for a month.

 

So, don't even reach to her unless she comes to you. Your brain is doing everything it can to fix things. But if she wants you back, she knows where and how to find you.

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I felt the same way, I drove 1,000 miles to another state like an idiot on a mission to " fix things". At that point, I wasn't blocked but I casually told her I was in town. She actually responded with a happy emoji at first and seemed happy to talk to me after 3 weeks of no contact. At the advice of a dating coach, I suggested we meet up for drinks. She and I talked on Whatsapp, she gave me the whole " You're a nice guy, you really are and I hate saying this. But You're not the one for me". I was crushed.. Very lonely and sobering experience not being able to see her after driving that far. No drinks, or meetup or last goodbyes. Eventually, she did block me and I haven't talked to her for a month.

 

So, don't even reach to her unless she comes to you. Your brain is doing everything it can to fix things. But if she wants you back, she knows where and how to find you.

 

I wish she said something like that to me as well, would make me let go of her easilier. Instead she acted as if she didnt want me to know that she started seeing that guy again and just put things on paus. Until I really asked her whats going on. Felt so 2nd choice at that point. Like if it wouldnt workout between them, she would be back with me, without me knowing she tested him again.

 

Not gonna contact her whatsoever. She still sees me at work once a week or so, so she will be reminded by me.

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@ExpatInItaly

I probably should. Very true, it hasnt got a solid foundation for a serious relationship. She has proven that I cant trust her. But at the other side, I dont want to look away when she stares since then it would be as if i have "lost". It would make me look insecure.

 

Huh?

 

We ladies don't think like that, OP. It would simply look like you're not going to play silly games and I would be embarrassed for even trying to get you to do so.

 

This is about attention for her, not because she misses you. She likes having her ego fluffed by imagining that you lust for her. You're applying a lot more emotional meaning to the staring contest than she is, trust me.

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Huh?

 

We ladies don't think like that, OP. It would simply look like you're not going to play silly games and I would be embarrassed for even trying to get you to do so.

 

This is about attention for her, not because she misses you. She likes having her ego fluffed by imagining that you lust for her. You're applying a lot more emotional meaning to the staring contest than she is, trust me.

 

I wasnt really clear of what I ment. Like if we get eyecontact and I quickly look away it would make me look insecure. Am I wrong? But if I look away slowley it would probably be different.

 

Sometimes when I know shes looking I act like if i dont see her, so its pretty mixed to be honest. When she looks at me and I look back I dont stare to give her attention, its more of "what you looking at face" I give her. If you understand what I mean.

Edited by Jeppepp
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I wasnt really clear of what I ment. Like if we get eyecontact and I quickly look away it would make me look insecure. Am I wrong? But if I look away slowley it would probably be different.

 

Sometimes when I know shes looking I act like if i dont see her, so its pretty mixed to be honest. When she looks at me and I look back I dont stare to give her attention, its more of "what you looking at face" I give her. If you understand what I mean.

 

Yes, because you are completely overestimating the significance of the staring.

 

How long you look at each other isn't relevant, in the end. It sucks, but the biggest problem is that she likes this other guy more than she likes you. Looking away slowly or quickly isn't going to change that.

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Yes, because you are completely overestimating the significance of the staring.

 

How long you look at each other isn't relevant, in the end. It sucks, but the biggest problem is that she likes this other guy more than she likes you. Looking away slowly or quickly isn't going to change that.

 

True I might be, but I never said that i would win her back depending on how i handle the staring game. Tho my point was if I should contact her. And i have made the conclusion to not to. She has made her choice.

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True I might be, but I never said that i would win her back depending on how i handle the staring game. Tho my point was if I should contact her. And i have made the conclusion to not to. She has made her choice.

 

Yes, and my point was that whether the staring (or lack thereof) makes you look insecure is irrelevant now. She isn't giving that as much thought as you believe she is; I promise you she's not driving away and giggling to herself about how insecure you are for looking away quickly. She is probably shrugging it off and calling her boyfriend on her way home.

 

But, you've made the right choice in terms of not reaching out. There is not point contacting her. She chose another guy so it's best that you accept it's over between you two so you can move on.

Edited by ExpatInItaly
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As Expat said,

 

 

Don't make a fool of yourself or like I did. Chasing or pursuing a girl who has dumped you like a 2nd class citizen, only drives her away further into the other guys arms.

 

 

It really does suck, especially if you had a meaningful connection with that girl as I did with the Russian gal. Just remember, you'll start to realize more faults of that person as time goes on. You don't want to be someone who's playing the field and keeping guys in her web.

 

Women really do hate needy or insecure behaviors, I mean even sending flowers at this point to make it up is a big risk. She'd have more respect for you if you just did nothing, start dating new women. You said you guys work together?

 

Women to make up their minds about a break up, prepare themselves and move on quicker. Guys get left behind wondering what the hell happened? It goes both ways too.

Edited by BMWN52
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As Expat said,

 

 

Don't make a fool of yourself or like I did. Chasing or pursuing a girl who has dumped you like a 2nd class citizen, only drives her away further into the other guys arms.

 

 

It really does suck, especially if you had a meaningful connection with that girl as I did with the Russian gal. Just remember, you'll start to realize more faults of that person as time goes on. You don't want to be someone who's playing the field and keeping guys in her web.

 

Women really do hate needy or insecure behaviors, I mean even sending flowers at this point to make it up is a big risk. She'd have more respect for you if you just did nothing, start dating new women. You said you guys work together?

 

Women to make up their minds about a break up, prepare themselves and move on quicker. Guys get left behind wondering what the hell happened? It goes both ways too.

 

 

Havnt seen her in over a week now, I think.... Probably saw her the other day when she walked right outside where I sit. But tried to not care. So I just carried on looking into my monitor. It was kinda dark outside. She probably saw me but w/e.

 

Our companies have the same owner, and lay right next to each other. Its two car dealerships. So we drive around alot and move cars etc, so thats why we see each other sometimes.

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Havnt seen her in over a week now, I think.... Probably saw her the other day when she walked right outside where I sit. But tried to not care. So I just carried on looking into my monitor. It was kinda dark outside. She probably saw me but w/e.

 

Our companies have the same owner, and lay right next to each other. Its two car dealerships. So we drive around alot and move cars etc, so thats why we see each other sometimes.

 

I got a plan for you my man. Since you guys work together. If you want to tease her or make her jealous like she did to you. Go on Rentafriend.com, look for a very attractive female in your area, like 8-9. Hotter than that girl. Have her pick you up at work in front of her and drive off. I'm willing to bet she'll start to blow up your phone again lmao �� :) Even better if you guys have a employee Christmas party take a girl.

 

I don't live in the same area as that Russian girl yet, or even work with her. But I woulda done this a long time ago. She'll be wondering how you got such a hot girl and moved on quickly lol. That hurts their egos.

 

Link:

https://rentafriend.com

Edited by BMWN52
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I got a plan for you my man. Since you guys work together. If you want to tease her or make her jealous like she did to you. Go on Rentafriend.com, look for a very attractive female in your area, like 8-9. Hotter than that girl. Have her pick you up at work in front of her and drive off. I'm willing to bet she'll start to blow up your phone again lmao �� :) Even better if you guys have a employee Christmas party take a girl.

 

I don't live in the same area as that Russian girl yet, or even work with her. But I woulda done this a long time ago. She'll be wondering how you got such a hot girl and moved on quickly lol. That hurts their egos.

 

Link:

https://rentafriend.com

 

OP, please don't do this. With respect to this poster, it's a terribly juvenile idea and won't work the way you want it to. It is also very transparent and will paint you in a desperate light.

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I got a plan for you my man. Since you guys work together. If you want to tease her or make her jealous like she did to you. Go on Rentafriend.com, look for a very attractive female in your area, like 8-9. Hotter than that girl. Have her pick you up at work in front of her and drive off. I'm willing to bet she'll start to blow up your phone again lmao �� :) Even better if you guys have a employee Christmas party take a girl.

 

I don't live in the same area as that Russian girl yet, or even work with her. But I woulda done this a long time ago. She'll be wondering how you got such a hot girl and moved on quickly lol. That hurts their egos.

 

Link:

https://rentafriend.com

 

Hah, that would of been funny. But id rather skip that option..

 

We are having a Christmas party this weekend with the work, and I think she isnt invited. Since she is only part-time employee. But we'll see.

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So we had this christmasparty last night. And she was there too.

 

Pretty awkward when we saw each other at first, I said oh hi familiar face and walked by, and she said heeeey and didn’t even look at me.

 

Later in the evening she actually came up to me and asked me how I was. We both were pretty drunk. We started talking. She dragged me to the bar where we were alone and we had a kinda deeptalk. She mentioned that she’s still seeing this guy and that they are sort of together.

 

But. She and I went to another place alone where we spoke even more. (Her idea) she told me that letting me go was really tough for her, because she really liked me she said. But that it wouldn’t work in the long run. She mentioned that they are in the same age and that they are in the same time in life with things too. And we aren’t. She mentioned that about me moving to another town to study, she also mentioned her willingness to have kids in soon future. Which I wasn’t into. Stuff like that.

 

She asked me how it’s going with my new girlfriend, I was like what girlfriend? Yeah the one you said you were seeing she said. I told her that I’m not seeing her anymore because I didn’t feel anything special with her. She asked questions like if we had gone to bed with eachother, I was like no I don’t go to bed with people I’m not totally into. She was like but you did so with me? And I answered yes because I really liked you obviously? She almost started crying and just stared into the wall without saying a word after I said that.

 

She mentioned that about me not saying hi or waving at her at work, she thought I was giving zero ****s about her.

 

She said that she thought I didn’t like her that much and didn’t care about her really. But that she really cared about me because she really really liked me she mentioned again. And that the time with me was really nice because we got along so well. I said didn’t realize how much I liked you until you left me. She almost started to cry again, and just looked at me without saying a word.

 

We shared a taxi me her and her colleague. She hooked her arm around mine for some reason. I jumped off first, she went out of the taxi with me to say goodbye. Can’t completely remember what happened, it was some talk about us again and a hug.

 

Feels like a good end of this I must say, age doesn’t matter but your situation in life does.

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<snip>

But. She and I went to another place alone where we spoke even more. (Her idea) she told me that letting me go was really tough for her, because she really liked me she said. But that it wouldn’t work in the long run. She mentioned that they are in the same age and that they are in the same time in life with things too. And we aren’t. She mentioned that about me moving to another town to study, she also mentioned her willingness to have kids in soon future. Which I wasn’t into. Stuff like that.

 

She asked me how it’s going with my new girlfriend, I was like what girlfriend? Yeah the one you said you were seeing she said. I told her that I’m not seeing her anymore because I didn’t feel anything special with her. She asked questions like if we had gone to bed with eachother, I was like no I don’t go to bed with people I’m not totally into. She was like but you did so with me? And I answered yes because I really liked you obviously? She almost started crying and just stared into the wall without saying a word after I said that. <snip>

 

At least you had some sort of closure. Just be careful if she ever does come back into your life. It's obvious she still has feelings and attractions for you. I think it's hailrious she couldn't take it, that you paid no attention to her. What did she expect for you to shower her with affection??

 

She's just as confused as you are. Basically she had to make a choice between two guys. That's the thing I dislike with certain people, they involve more people into the picture than there needs to be. She sucked two guys into her web and drama, does what she pleases.

 

My situation is a bit crazy too. That girl I've been talking about is in a relationship with a guy down the street from my friends house ha. I'm still trying to figure that out, she's been flying into my state and city for this dude. She knows I'm from here too. I haven't heard anything from her at all. I'm in better shape than he is. I don't get it.

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At least you had some sort of closure. Just be careful if she ever does come back into your life. It's obvious she still has feelings and attractions for you. I think it's hailrious she couldn't take it, that you paid no attention to her ��. What did she expect for you to shower her with affection??

 

She's just as confused as you are. Basically she had to make a choice between two guys. That's the thing I dislike with certain people, they involve more people into the picture than there needs to be. She sucked two guys into her web and drama, does what she pleases.

 

My situation is a bit crazy too. That girl I've been talking about is in a relationship with a guy down the street from my friends house ha. I'm still trying to figure that out, she's been flying into my state and city for this dude. She knows I'm from here too. I haven't heard anything from her at all. I'm in better shape than he is. I don't get it.

 

 

 

Yeah it kinda hurts to know that she really liked me, feels like lost love in one way. She probably is so confused right now after I told her I really liked her too and wanted to build something with her. But I told her that she has made her choice and I cant change that. She was like but I thought you didnt...

 

I dont know what to say about your situation really. From what I have learned is that you shouldnt think too much. Things can be so differently from what you think. I thought this girl used me as a rebound or somebody to just be with. But I was wrong. She truly liked me, from what she said and showed yesterday. Ofcourse she can lie, but then she is a hell of a good actor...

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I think that's interesting considering she didn't allow you, or me in the case of the other girl to confess our feelings right away. Sounds like both of these women we dated are inpatient and playing games with us. I mean she must have knowm you liked her?

 

 

In my situation she did talk to me gave the whole " you're a really nice guy, great personality a lot of fun. I hate saying this. But I know it will not work. I just know". She kept pushing me away, even told me she hopes I find someone. Somehow she's had 3 different guys involved in her life since Sept. Me and you were just a form of entertainment for them who started to feel for these women. I know they felt emotions for us, but women can move on quickly.I still feel like trying fix things, despite her new relationship. We had something special aside from casual sex. I went to the beach, zoo, iconic spots in the city. All boyfriend stuff. That's why I'm hung up on it.

Edited by BMWN52
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I think that's interesting considering she didn't allow you, or me in the case of the other girl to confess our feelings right away. Sounds like both of these women we dated are inpatient and playing games with us. I mean she must have knowm you liked her?<snip>

 

 

As mentioned, I didn't feel anything super special until I lost her, that's when I realized i really liked her. So in one way i have myself to blame. I didn't give her enough. We had fun and so but I could of done so much more.. But i think her insecurities has a major role in this.

 

When she started acting off I told her I liked her, she said she liked me too. She brought that up the other day. I know you said you liked me but i didn’t think you liked me THAT much.

 

“You moved on so quickly from me, you started seeing this other girl so I thought you never really cared about me” she basically said you didn’t fight for me. No duh? She choose someone else over me. I can’t affect that... She said she ain’t worth me and that I would probably leave her if we carried on our dating, since I would easily find someone better than her.

 

It’s not much we can do, I told her the other day what I really felt. She got the message. I clearly said to her that I can’t affect her decision. It’s all up to her.

 

We shouldn’t go around thinking or hoping. Even tho it’s very hard to not to.

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So I saw her at work the other day. I was in the car and she was walking, so i honked and waved and drove by. Since she said on the party that she didn’t think I cared about her anymore since I was ditching and not saying hi. I wanted to prove her wrong.

 

But later she came driving meanwhile I was walking, but she drove up to me and took down the window and started talking with me. She said jump in so i did and we talked. It was the same kind of talk we had just before we started our dating. I was just trying to have a normal chat with her but for some reason it like felt a bit flirty.

 

We ran into eachother again in the garage, talked a lil bit, same here a bit flirty talk, she ended with well I guess ill se you around then, I was like yeah c ya and drove away. But i actually snapchatted her 30 mins later (About a funny thing that just happend me and that we just talked about) She was flirty once again now in the snap. In the last Snapchat she sent a photo of her shoppingbasket full with taco ingredients. We had taco Friday’s back when we dated. That’s the first that came up in my mind. Why else would she send photo of that. I didn’t reply and now we haven’t had contact since then. Probably like, look I am going to have taco Friday with my bf.

 

She has a boyfriend from what she said last weekend on the party. She did mention it’s going on well with them and she’s gonna meet his family on new years. But she still wants me in her life. The time together me and her has spent with eachother is basically only when we dated. So it’s not as I’m a long time friend she can’t just let go. Her boyfriend doesn’tknow about me. She is probably just playing games. Or there is some other reason.

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