BrotherAaron Posted March 29, 2005 Share Posted March 29, 2005 Long story short: I got dumped, for another guy no less. I had to figure it out on my own, but since him and my ex are both practically my next door neighbors, it was not hard to figure out, once I got past the good ol' fashioned denial. Anyway, I was lost, heartbroken, and wanted her back... all the friends I've made in college are his friends too, as I thought he was at one time. Having nobody to turn to, I found Loveshack... and that's where things started getting better. I started NC, because I wanted her back. Well... it worked. She came crawling back. And... ...and I told her to get lost. What, do I look stupid? Anyway, thanks Loveshack, you may have tricked me into moving on. Maybe I woulda figured it out on my own, who knows. Either way I got what I wanted and what I needed. I wanted her to want me back - well, she does. I also needed not to want her back. Well, I don't. I still have a long road ahead of me. Ending a relationship hurts, even after you decide that's what you want. I see her often. I see her with him even. And by see, I mean I could slap them both as I walk by (and it's tempting) - but I'll deal with it. Hopefully I can resist the urge to crack his skull with a baseball bat, but that's only for my own sake... the laws a bitch when it comes to assault and battery. There are times when I have my doubts... when I start thinking I might want her back... but I don't try to call her. It blows over. Fugghetaboutit Link to post Share on other sites
RoxStar Posted April 1, 2005 Share Posted April 1, 2005 Great post. Way to be strong too! Break ups are never fun no matter which side you are on. Link to post Share on other sites
simon_uk Posted April 1, 2005 Share Posted April 1, 2005 Nice One Aaron! That really is great! i laughed at your comment about slapping them! haha theres nothing more embarrassing than a man getting 'slapped' by another man! haha Biatch! Keep Strong you're doing great! Brotherly Love Man Simon Link to post Share on other sites
EC Posted April 1, 2005 Share Posted April 1, 2005 Right on! She left you for another man and then you payed no attention to her so she wanted you back. Basically to have her cake and eat it to! I'm glad you stuck to your guns!! But yeah don't go b*tch slapping people lol (unless your dressed in all black with a face mask on and your hand slips) cough cough JK! lol Link to post Share on other sites
greenhorn Posted April 1, 2005 Share Posted April 1, 2005 Originally posted by BrotherAaron I got dumped, for another guy no less. I had to figure it out on my own, but since him and my ex are both practically my next door neighbors, it was not hard to figure out, once I got past the good ol' fashioned denial. Was just wondering how many guys in LS have been dumped by their GF for OTHER GUY@#$%^&. I think almost all. Link to post Share on other sites
simon_uk Posted April 1, 2005 Share Posted April 1, 2005 Well I don't think I have but recently it has been crossing my mind a lot. having said that the last itme I spoke to her (Monday) she said she has bought herself some flowers and some underwear to cheer herself up. She said she doesn't need a mna to make herself feel better! os maybe not. Cant help thinking she has though. :-( Simon Link to post Share on other sites
greenhorn Posted April 1, 2005 Share Posted April 1, 2005 Originally posted by simon_uk Well I don't think I have but recently it has been crossing my mind a lot. having said that the last itme I spoke to her (Monday) she said she has bought herself some flowers and some underwear to cheer herself up. She said she doesn't need a mna to make herself feel better! os maybe not. Cant help thinking she has though. :-( Simon It would be less painful if it is not due to other guy but honestly speaking I won't ask you to trust her, who knows she didnt tell you the truth.Most girls don't like to say that leaving for it to be found. Link to post Share on other sites
sanne Posted April 1, 2005 Share Posted April 1, 2005 well as far as I know my ex didn't dump me for another guy. In fact, I was the one who inadvertently ended the relationship. We were having another fight, and I mentioned that I was running out of reasons to stay in the relationship, to which she replied then maybe we should break up. The funny thing is I'm sure she'll end up back with her ex boyfriend. She found me after they had broken up, and that loser stuck around the whole time begging her to come back. She rejected him twice to be with me, and now she'll probably be going back to him. I would never be that pathetic though, to hang around like that waiting the whole time while my ex goes around fscking other guys (the dude waited for 6 months). What a bitch she is though, she must have been stringing him along this whole time we were going out to keep as a backup. I just can't trust her, man this feels good to vent. The more I think about it, the less I do want her back. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BrotherAaron Posted April 1, 2005 Author Share Posted April 1, 2005 Part of me is even starting to find comfort in the fact that I was left for someone... because it means that she has been weak, and having trouble dealing with the loss of our relationship, or else she'd be just fine spending time by herself for a while. I don't think she could have fallen in love overnight. Nobody falls in love overnight... even those of us who tend to throw ourselves at people. Eventually it becomes copiously clear that there was nothing there to begin with but lust and despearation. I think jumping to a new relationship is an unhealthy way to deal with the loss of an old one. Eventually you have to let yourself be open to the idea of finding someone new, but the more important first step is to give yourself time to be ok with being alone. How can you be confortable in a relationship with somebody else if you can't be confortable by yourself? She's making a mistake by not giving herself some time to think and some room to breathe. It's a sign of weakness, really, when a person leaves for someone new. If they were confortable in their own skin, they would focus on themselves for a while. It's not like those relationships ever work out in the long run anyway, so why waste your time? Meanwhile, she's gotta know that, by cheating, she destroyed our relationship. Even if there were problems (I guess there must have been), there are ways to either try and work things out, or end them in a graceful way. Just ripping somebody's heart out, and betraying them in the very way they trusted you not to... that can't feel good. I know she loved me (maybe still does), there's no way that she can be proud that she hurt me. Meanwhile, she's still seeing this guy... this guy who betrayed her former true love... and she can't be stupid enough to not see that he pretended to be friends with me the whole time he was trying to get with her. He has already used me, and he will use her too. Who respects that kind of person? She's surrounded by people that we met together, and half of them won't give her the time of day anymore. The other half, well, I pretty much don't give them the time of day. I might not like everything they tell her, but one thing I know she's heard a lot is "What you did, and what you are doing, isn't fair to him." I'd be overcome with guilt at this point, if I were in her shoes. So she's with him, sort of, but she wont say she is... and I think I'm beginning to understand why. She's finding herself stuck in a relationship based on lust, lies, betrayal, guilt, and desperation... and I don't see how she can't hate it Well, ex, good luck with that... because my ship has sailed, and I wont be there to help you when that sh*t hits the fan Link to post Share on other sites
Author BrotherAaron Posted April 2, 2005 Author Share Posted April 2, 2005 I went to mexico tonight... I'm still somewhat drunk. I saw my ex with her new BF when I got back, because he lives 5 doors down from me (at most). I got pissed, and wrote her the following email Hey... good news! I don't give a f*ck about you parading David in front of me anymore... because you're just a waste of my time. And, no, I haven't had sex with anyone else.. but then I'm not a slut, unlike some people who might not waste any time in sleeping around. Anyway, how's waiting for marriage working out for you? Nevermind, I don't want to know. Good luck with that waste of your time. Hope that you're sticking to your values (even though I know you aren't). Isn't Christina such a good (and by good, I mean slutty) influence on you? Yeah, have fun. I regret giving you the best three years of my life... because you really could have spent them better ****ing somebody else. Just ask Christina, or John Tipton. I'm sure they'd agree... slut. I don't even know why I care enough to write this email... maybe just because I'm drunk, and I'm writing everyone emails. Thank god for the spell check, or else this wouldn't even be readable. Actually, don't bother thanking god. I know you believe he exists, but you don't exactly act like a christian anymore... so I'm sure he's disappointed. Anyway, I'm gonna do something better than waste my time on you. I've already wasted three years on you, and you suck for not telling me sooner that you were such a ****ing waste of my time. bye. Oh man I know this is bad, but I can't undo it. I'm still drunk, for that matter. I got a few phone numbers tonight though. I don't want my ex back, but why does she have to let me see her with this guy? She's such a ****ing bitch... damn it. I'm sorry, I'm venting... but seriously. I wish she would drop off the face of the Earth. Oh well, at least I know there a lot of girls interested in me... I'm just sick of seeing her with him. She seems to take pride in that. BTW I really attacked her weaknesses in this email. Please tell me I wont regret this tomorrow morning, because I know she's a bitch and she deserves any heartache I can dish out. Forget her. Link to post Share on other sites
greenhorn Posted April 2, 2005 Share Posted April 2, 2005 This is a fitting email to a dumper who dumps for someone else....I @#$%^ these dumpers. Link to post Share on other sites
Donut Posted April 2, 2005 Share Posted April 2, 2005 Did you actually send this e-mail? Link to post Share on other sites
AndrewJ Posted April 2, 2005 Share Posted April 2, 2005 WOOO man u really gave her both barrels. Many kleenex needed for her. She prob now realises that she did u harm. You gotta love how they parade their new object around to bring u down Link to post Share on other sites
Author BrotherAaron Posted April 2, 2005 Author Share Posted April 2, 2005 I know her email password, and I signed on and deleted the email. I didn't read her other email... and I haven't signed on to her email before. I know it's a little bit across the line to be using her password, but I didn't really want her to read that email. I'm not sparing her feelings, either. I'm sparing my own. She doesn't need to know that I'm hurt/angry/upset sometimes. There's no point showing her how I feel about anytthing, unless the way I feel at the moment is happy to be rid of her. Even anger is more than I'm willing to show her. It's not until I see her that I start having a hard time - and alocohol makes it so much worse. Not that I normally would be very happy after she made it a point for me to see her go into his room with him at 4:00 in the morning. She really has turned into a heartless bitch. I don't deserve to see that. How does someone that you gave nothing but love to for so long hurt you so much even when they know what they're doing - and can completely avoid it? And, don't worry guys, I've had to deal with this before, and I'll deal with it again. She's running out of ways to hurt me. Link to post Share on other sites
greenhorn Posted April 2, 2005 Share Posted April 2, 2005 Hmm anyway in the hindsight it was a good decision not to let her read that mail. She should get nothing but indifference from you and it might be hurting but you can do that. I appreciate the way you are going through this, must be very hard for anyone else to be in this position to see her daily with somene else. Can't you try relocating to some other place where you don't need to see her daily. Really she does seems to be heartless. Best wishes Link to post Share on other sites
Author BrotherAaron Posted April 2, 2005 Author Share Posted April 2, 2005 I'm moving out when the semester ends, which is only a month away, so I haven't made any special arrangements to move. I shouldn't have to move, anyway. Maybe I'll recommend that she relocate. Ugh... I just got an IM from her, as I type this... "what were u doin up late last night" I'm not going to bother responding Link to post Share on other sites
greenhorn Posted April 2, 2005 Share Posted April 2, 2005 Originally posted by BrotherAaron I'm moving out when the semester ends, which is only a month away, so I haven't made any special arrangements to move. I shouldn't have to move, anyway. Maybe I'll recommend that she relocate. Ugh... I just got an IM from her, as I type this... "what were u doin up late last night" I'm not going to bother responding screw it man..you are correct dont reply to the IM. So damn heartless.... Link to post Share on other sites
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