Lost soul mate - forever

[daredoj]

Firstly a brief introduction about me..

 

Male, Single, 32 (almost 33), great career in an industry i love, financially secure, own my own property / car etc and have very little debt. I’d like to think i’m not a bad looking guy try and keep in shape with the gym etc. I have never been in what I would regard as a long term relationship, however, there are plenty of one night stands and brief flings behind me. Got a good close knit group of friends, however, they all seem to have got themselves wives and girlfriends and I sometimes feel like a gooseberry.

 

 

Now…My problem.

 

I first met her when she was 17 and i was 19, from the minute I laid eyes on her she was perfect, I met her from being mates with her brother. We never dated exclusively and it’s mainly been unrequited love except for the odd kiss and cuddle on nights out. Always in contact throughout the years and for many years i’ve fantasised about being in a relationship with her, how i’d act, how i’d make her laugh, places we’d go, things we’d do.

 

 

Well I found out last week that she is getting married next year. She moved to London about 5 years ago and then Canada 2 years ago and i always held hope that she’d come back home and we’d eventually go out for that drink she once said yes to. It’s so difficult to accept she is going to be with another man for the rest of her life and that she never got to fully understand the real me, only the lovesick type (which i know the ladies don’t exactly find *attractive* qualities in a man)

 

 

So I decided to write her a letter, posted it to where she works out in Canada and it mainly was a congratulations on getting married etc but also I told her exactly how i’ve felt over the years, told her I love her and always will, as even though through the years when i’ve had infatuations with other women, she’s always been on my mind. Brought up all little intricate moments of our past that we’ve shared together and told her if i could give anything to turn the clock back and share all those moments again I would.

 

I my heart of hearts i know that letter will mean nothing to her, but i’d give anything in this world for her to leave everything, come back home and be with me, however selfish that may sound.

 

I honestly don’t know how i’m going to cope, It feels like i’m waiting for the gallows waiting for her to get married, i came off all social media about a year ago to forget her (couldn’t bear seeing her in pics with someone else) even don’t speak to her bro that much anymore cos he reminds me of her and also tried getting out there and dating but well, haven’t met anyone that compares.

[bathtub-row]

I'm sorry you're hurting over this. But I'd have to say that I don't think this is a mutual soul mate kind of thing. If it was, those intimate moments the two of you shared would've evolved into something more. For soul mates, that can't help but happen.

 

As far as her getting married and it lasting the rest of her life, that's actually not likely. Most marriages don't last. How long ago did you send the letter? Again, if she feels the soul mate feelings toward you, your letter actually might cause her to stop and think. I'm curious to see if she responds.

 

I'll tell you a little secret about soul mate relationships. They will more often rip you up than take you to new heights. I've experienced two relationships like that in my lifetime and I'm not with either one of those guys. You might be better off finding someone you feel comfortable with, someone you like talking to, and find attractive. Those people will take a lot less out of you and your soul.

[daredoj]

Hi,

 

I only posted yesterday so she won't get it for another week i guess.

 

She had a habit of never replying (use to blow hot and cold) I should really have taken the hint as her n/c was obvs a sign of no interest or a subtle way of saying it can't happen cos we live far apart. So i don't expect a response back, although it would be nice