crederer Posted July 8, 2013 Share Posted July 8, 2013 My grandma passed away last week. My ex heard about it and asked if she could come. I said yes. I was basically expecting her to just pay her respects but she ended up being quite comforting, hugging me, holding my hand, etc. Of course she shows up looking as beautiful as ever and me looking like I was hit by a train. We've been broken up for about 4 months. LC, spoke on the phone a couple of times, met in person a couple of times. I felt like I was starting to move on then after this I feel set back. I haven't been able to sleep much since and she's on my mind again a lot. It seems strange because the other times I met up with her I didn't feel set back. She's made statements saying that she truly wants to still be in eachothers lives, hasn't said or indicated anything more, or really point blank said she wants anything less. She's made it clear a couple times that she hasn't dated or slept with anyone since (I didn't probe for this information either, she just offered it). I'm not expecting a recon either. I appreciate her being comforting for me, but I now wish I asked her not to come. I just don't understand why this time is more difficult for me than the other times. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted July 8, 2013 Share Posted July 8, 2013 (edited) Because (a) you're emotionally vulnerable and (b) she acted like nothing had ever happened. Confusion reigns. You're right - you should have said No. To a certain extent you invited this (but I can see why), so sadly, you just have to look at yourself as being all the way back to square one again. I can never understand LC (apart from having kids/working together)...It just serves to prolong the agony. You only THOUGHT you were 'moving on.' In fact, nothing could have been further from the truth... THIS time - go full-on complete NC. You know it makes sense. Edited July 8, 2013 by TaraMaiden Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted July 8, 2013 Share Posted July 8, 2013 I'm sorry about your grandmom. I think it's nice that she paid respect and comforted you through this difficult time. She sounds like a good person. Link to post Share on other sites
mtnbiker3000 Posted July 8, 2013 Share Posted July 8, 2013 I can never understand LC (apart from having kids/working together)...It just serves to prolong the agony. You forgot living together That's why I had to stay LC for a while. AND IT SUCKED!!! NC all the way. Almost 4 months for me!! Sorry OP. This does indeed suck. Well, as TM mentioned now is the time for NC... Link to post Share on other sites
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