Some anxiety after my first breakup

[Runscream]

So I had been with my ex girlfriend for one year and a half and she broke up with me a month and a half ago. At first I was devastated, but I started NC since the beggining, so I started getting better kind of fast and was trying to take it as well as I could, trying to learn from the experience instead of getting depressed... until I found out she had replaced me only three weeks after our breakup. THEN I got really really depressed for what has probably been the worst week of my life. I had anxiety attacks, nausea, and cried in class even though I tried not to.

 

After that, I decided to get over her.

 

I stopped checking her facebook wall (lots of willpower)

Started checking out other girls

Counteracted thoughts such as "she was the one" with "UNTIL she left me".

And told myself "well, if she thinks there's someone else better for her than me, I have the right to think the same, so I'll keep my possibilities open".

 

Since then I have started to get so much better, although I still miss her really bad from time to time. And that's what worries me the most, that I won't be able to find another girl with the traits I miss from my ex:

-Her voice. It's probably what I miss the most.

-Her teases. I just can't imagine any of the girls I know right now teasing, they all look so innocent.

-Loving me as I am. You see, I'm not exactly the manly type of guy (except in bed and when I have to confront someone), I'm more of cute, somewhat shy and a little childish. BUT I don't think I'm too physically attractive. But she liked me exactly like that, while every other girl I could be interested in probably wants more the manly type of guy.

-We were both clingy to each other, like we liked to hug a lot and everywhere and give lots of little kisses on the cheeks, nose and forehead. While I see other girls I could be interested in would probably want more physical space.

 

I know these thoughts come to me probably because she was my first girlfriend, so I don't have anyone to compare her to, but I would like some insight from guys with more experience and from girls themselves.

[SimonSerenade]

You've got the right mind set, now that she's gone and ain't coming back, it doesn't matter what she does, as much as it might hurt, keep thinking that, there's plenty of girls out there, there's somebody for everyone, look forward to meeting these girls and getting to know them don't look back on the ex, she don't matter now, you matter now and only you, you sound like a good guy, I'm sure there's plenty of women out there who would love nothing more than to bust nuts with you and talk to you for hours after, keep your chin up feller and treat yourself well.