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Noooooooo I broke NC today!


TheVSilent

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I failed, I don't know why, I just missed her and wanted things to be different....it has been since May13th since we broke up and June 26th since I started NC. Well she never responded back then, so I gave it a shot today and called, but for some reason was way to nervous once I heard the phone ring and I hung up.

 

I don't feel like I am back at square one though, I feel bad, not that she won't call back or anything but that I broke down and called myself. Lesson learned, it is just so hard!

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No problem. It is a setback but you will be fine!

 

A lot of us broke NC and experienced how it feels afterwards. Sometimes it feels like defeat when the ex responds negatively. Sometimes it is filled with uncertain hope when we do have a decent conversation with our ex. Sometimes it is filled with even greater hurt when the ex doesn't respond at all.

 

Start fresh today. Go back to NC and seek comfort from people who care( family, friends, and LS!). I know it is odd that you are unable to just talk with your ex as easily as you could when you were together. The dynamic has changed and you need to take care of you for a change. And please do that. Protect your heart from anymore hurt.

 

Before you make a decision to do anything like contact your ex, jump into a new relationship too soon, etc. Give yourself some real time to think about the consequences, not what you hope the end result will be.

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Sorry to hear this man. Try not to beat yourself up too badly about it though. You've maintained NC since June 26th! Thats a good run and you should be proud that you lasted that long. NC is a seriously hard thing to maintain!!

 

Try to look at it this way, you went just shy of 2 months this time round and now this is your target to beat. Set yourself that goal and work on achieving it. Hopefully as you approach the 2 month mark again, you won't feel the need to contact her and then just keep going.

 

You might break NC again and have a new target. Just keep going until you reach the run where you maintain NC indefinitely.

 

Good luck mate! :)

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no big deal. it happens. i semi-stalked my ex these past few days. i logged into the IM acct i used to chat with him on to see if he was online (he wasn't). i actually tried checking up on him a few times that way. nothing ever panned out.

 

which is a good thing. the less i know the better. but i know how frustrating it can be to give into that temptation to reach out. i tried not to beat myself up over it; but the whole pace of the thing reminded me of how crazed and desperate i was back then. and i for a few days, i was that person - - wondering why he's not online. did he delete me? is he taking time off and spending it with someone else? he never takes off in august - - always in july for his birthday.

 

but eventually, i came back down to reality. it doesn't matter if he deleted me or not or if he's spending time with some other girl. all that matters what is i'm doing. which is concentrating on moving forward with my healing.

 

i felt silly and even guilty for letting myself backslide into those paranoid thought patterns.but then i guess i needed to re-visit the person i was back then in order to appreciate the person i'm working on becoming now :)

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It happens to the best of us OP. We all have our weak moments. the best thing you can do is seriously delete all her information from your life. This way you really have to go out of your way to make contact the next time you are terribly missing her.

 

Go out and have fun with your life OP. Forget about the ex, she is not thinking about you (it helps to tell yourself this!). Move on one day at a time and before you know it you will stop thinking about her! Stay NC!:)

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Thanks everybody, I feel slightly down, for some reason I thought maybe we could be civil, things ended on such a bad note, I was mean to her for the better part of a year, she got sick of me and dumped me. She held up her end of NC ever since, I started going to counseling, and really have been working on myself but just can't seem to ger her out my brain. I still find it hard to accept that she has deleted me for good, 5 years and it is all over, but here's to another new start.

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