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Why do exes bring us down in order to bring themselves up?


Username37

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I don't get it. I just don't.

 

Do they enjoy getting a reaction out of us? This question has been bothering me.

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hurt and devastated

That's a good question. From what I've seen and read here, some are just truly mean-spirited and feed off of knowing they are making us miserable and putting us through hell. It's not a good feeling, but if you can put up a brave front and show them it's not affecting you the way they want it to, it can help.

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That's a good question. From what I've seen and read here, some are just truly mean-spirited and feed off of knowing they are making us miserable and putting us through hell. It's not a good feeling, but if you can put up a brave front and show them it's not affecting you the way they want it to, it can help.

 

Why though? They hurt us already. Why do it some more?. Especially to a person that you once said "I love you" too.

 

I'm trying to fight it. I don't see her or talk to her and she still figures out how to hurt me.

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Because....

 

....they can because you let them.

 

It's a question of determining who your Mind belongs to.

 

If you take sole possession of your thought processes, and how you view and evaluate stuff, you can protect yourself from the assault of the words and actions of fools.

 

If however, you abdicate all or part of that responsibility, and give them carte blanche to access when they choose, then we will feel the consequences of their idiocy, and take it to heart. We basically give them permission to continue hurting us.

 

So, you have to choose:

Are you going to control your perceptions, thoughts, views and actions - or are you prepared to let them continue getting away with it?

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I think it's because even if they have dumped you/are moving on, it hurts them to see you moving on. So probably just to keep you down to make themselves feel superior. Get yourself out there don't let them do it.

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Do they enjoy getting a reaction out of us?

 

It's not that at all, it's not about you.

 

Think of it this way, you're both standing in the same pile of shyt. She's climbing on you to get out. If she could see a better way out she'd take it. It's nothing personal, really, she just doesn't care about you anymore.

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the only way the can is IF YOU ALLOW IT.

 

stop participating. stop allowing it. stop reacting or over reacting to anything that has to do with this person.

 

it goes away if you ignore it... long enough...

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messymichelle

its a good question -

i have no idea why they do it, but what i think is that its a ego thing.

my ex done it to me for a while, because he thought that i met someone else, and even though he was already wwith someone, i think that he contacted me out of fear, that i was moving on and that the door would possible be closed for him to return.

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