Random, out of nowhere flashbacks...how to deal?

[4givrnt4gtr]

So, its been 5 months since my break up with a guy i truly cared for.

 

The first few months were quite painful. Actually the first month or two there was not a day I did not cry.

 

I kept the hope and then lost it, and then gain it again over and over. I tried NC, LC, whatever.

 

So, anyhow. Finally I stayed NC for maybe two months, between november and january. Still i hoped he would contact me, at least for my birthday. Ofcourse he didnt.

 

Still, with each month and each "let down" i kept moving forward, slowly letting go. I think of it as if I have been dragged kicking and screaming down the "get over it" road.

 

Anyhow, the last straw was when, after readding him as my friend on FB and sending him a message he added me but ignored my message. A few week i was in his area for school purposes and ofcourse I made sure he "knew" thru FB just in case he wanted to meet up....ofcourse he didnt.

When i was there, in his area, I realized the futility of it all, to hold onto someone who truly could care less, even if just as friends. It felt like the last tie had been broken and the wrap over my eyes finally fell. It was over and I had to accept it.

 

So after that I can truly say I am pretty much over it. The more i look back over our relationship and over what has happened, there is no way we can salvage it, even if he wanted to. That has made me feel so free and happy.

Ofcourse I realize that I still have a lot of feelings for him, but I know we cant ever be together again, its not healthy and would result in a lot of the same problems we've had anyway so I dont want to get back with him, regardless of how I feel about him.

The only thing is...the random flashbacks I get out of nowhere.

 

For instance, the flashback I just got that inspired this thread. I'm enjoying my upbeat, new music, getting my midterm study guide ready, jammin' typing, having a good time...then BOOM....a memory of us at a lake we went to over the summer, skipping rocks, having a great time flashes thru my mind.

It totally stops me on my tracks.

What the heck! Im doing NOTHING remotely related to that memory, the music is definitely not connected in any way to him, the time or anything.

 

This happens often. Im driving, singing my little heart out, FLASH, memory of eating sushi after work.

I'm watching my little novela FLASH a memory of us in the beach.

 

Its soooo weird. Does this happen to you guys?? if so how do you deal with it? or better yet, what can I do to avoid them? More often than not I shake it off, but sometimes, the memory bring on a lot of emotions and drags me down.

 

Anyone knows why this happens? I need it to stop

[Speed Demon]

Honestly, I don't think it ever stops. Going back to the relationships that failed before my most recent one, I still get flash backs.

 

As more time goes by the less painful it gets. Sure, you may always have that soft spot and it may bring a brief, yet fleeting feeling of nostalgia, but they do go away.

 

Eventually, they are fleeting and don't affect you that bad and go as quickly as they came.