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Turn of events... now I'm letting go

Coping Learning to deal with one's emotions and loss.

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Old 29th August 2009, 9:54 PM   #16
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Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 976
Things are better - possibly stable. It's funny, my counselor asked how I felt about him and I said I wasn't sure. That part of me loved him as much as I always have and another part of me was sick of the drama. We spent last weekend apart to give us both space and he called me/texted me all weekend. Today, we had a barbecue at a friend's house and they are all happy we're "back together." But for me, it doesn't feel like that. It still feels tenuous. Again, he's trying so I have nothing to base this on. I guess I just always live in fear that the moment our relationship changes to a greater commitment, he'll bolt again.

I got the books two days ago and read Why Men Can't Commit already. I have to say, I thought it made a lot of excuses for his behavior and I wasn't impressed. I'm now reading "He's Scared, She's Scared." Still both books look at relationships from their very beginning. I think I need a book about after it goes wrong. Of course, the insight is helpful in understanding that it wasn't me. Cognitively, I knew that. But, I couldn't believe that until it was validated.

So, life is okay. We're somewhere in-between and trying to navigate uncomfortable waters. He hasn't let me down since the too tired to come over incident, so I genuinely believe he's trying.
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