BW007 Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 I know, I know, it is done, over, caput, trashed, ruined, history, toxic, the past.....but sometimes it gets bad with all the negative space where they used to be, and the loneliness and missing them can overwhelm you. That is where I am tonight, and you better believe I would see her in a second if she said the word. What are your suggestions for getting past those low point, weak moments?Crap:mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad:/Crap Link to post Share on other sites
hopesndreams Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 Just know that those feelings of misery will pass and in it's place there will be peace, and then it happens all over again with less duration (hopefully) and each time you suffer through it, the pain will lessen. That's what I tell myself anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
EmperorR Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 It get's better, trust me I was in your shoes, ex fiance cheated and left me felt like crap every day, only thing works is time, read a book, watch a movie (swingers helps me), know your not the only one in this situation. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BW007 Posted April 26, 2009 Author Share Posted April 26, 2009 Man, I don't know why tonight is so difficult. I am really missing her bad tonight, and it has been better lately.WTF???? It is mental overload. Link to post Share on other sites
playlislay Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 Hahaha!! I can REALLY relate to this one BW700. Just when life is all fine and dandy, you think to yourself 'wow, I really am over them' (although you know deep down in your heart that there will alsways be love for them) and then *****BAM!***** Youre crying! You miss them! You start to think about fond memories! You start to think that youre still in love with them and ponder why you arent together, if theyve found someone else and if you should contact them. (DONT!) WTF is this all about hmmmm? Well, I think we put alot of time and energy into focussing on everything other than them. Its when we lose that focus that we slip. Bearing in mind that we did love this person very much and somewhere inside we still do. We just choose to forget as it is our only way of dealing with heartache-unless you want to let it rui your life and become a comlete psycho!?? Its our protective barriers that we have built flaking, swaying in the breeze, unsturdy from lack of mental stimulation and focus. Saying that, he pops into my head at the most random of times but I have to push it out of my head in order to carry on normally-that is my barrier. Push, push, push. I vow to myself everyday that even if he wanted to give me another chance then I wouldnt. I dont need him. He is no good for me. It wouldnt have lasted. etc etc. Mental recognition is my only remedy. Link to post Share on other sites
PinkRibbon Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 I have no idea how to get over the rough days. Seems I am having more rough days than good day. I am trying also like everyone else to stay busy, hang out with friemds, spend more time with my child but all I am doing is making my self exhausted and drained. Link to post Share on other sites
Chinook Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 I had a rough day today. I spent most of it in the garden. It took me 4 hours to mow all my lawns and to prune back my trees and perennials. Tomorrow I still have some border weeding to do and pots to prepare. So I have stuff to do - doesn't make it any easier though. Link to post Share on other sites
monkeymaid Posted April 27, 2009 Share Posted April 27, 2009 i dont know the solution. ...im with you today. ...i work out, and still feel it, i go to work and still hurt. ...i hope and i feel better, then snap back to reality and the pain is still there. ...i think i am going to embrace all of this sadness, and hurt and just hold it and carry it around like its my life till one day i get tired of it, and realize i dont actually NEED this, then just let it go. ...i hope it works. ...let me know if you figure this out. my wishes lately have been for everybody feeling like me to pull out of it and be ok Link to post Share on other sites
CM2009 Posted April 27, 2009 Share Posted April 27, 2009 it's an everyday struggle my wife and I are seperated and lord knows where we are headed and it is tough though. One day you feel great and the other you feel like crap. But you just have to stay positive and try to find some way to move on, as well keeping busy. Link to post Share on other sites
PinkRibbon Posted April 27, 2009 Share Posted April 27, 2009 Bad moment right now. Missing him terribly. Just popped me 2 tylenol PM to help me sleep tonight. That is going to be coping strategy tonight. Sleep. Link to post Share on other sites
EmperorR Posted April 27, 2009 Share Posted April 27, 2009 All I can say Is that it sucks now but there are millions of people in the world worst off than you, it always helps me to think ok there is nothing I can do about his situation I am powerless so why worry or get stressed. Link to post Share on other sites
9Lives Posted April 27, 2009 Share Posted April 27, 2009 well first of all...glad I am not alone... to help with the pain I *come to LS and read l*ook up those feelings I have on the website to get insight on what others do when they had these similar feelings *HUGE HELP is listening to Godly music ...very soothing,very peaceful, very calming. This has been huge *Going to church *eating bad *crying *talking to others Im still in the woods dealing with this stuff. I have to do something different all the time. to try to keep going. I still hope he comes back but I wont be calling him or texting him. I just have to keep living. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted April 27, 2009 Share Posted April 27, 2009 No offense but you realize she's a three-timing piece of poo, don't you? Link to post Share on other sites
Author BW007 Posted April 27, 2009 Author Share Posted April 27, 2009 Yeah I know and you are right that she is a big old slutbag that cheated like it was a bad episode of cheaters. Three timing piece o crap is right. I am just pissed that this is who she decided to be . I miss the good, I know its gone and she can eF off but that doesn't mean I don't have a bad time with it sometimes. Sometimes, like last night, I was missing the hell out of her. I miss her now, but give me some credit, we have been NC for a month or so. At least I am here asking for help rather than asking her for some kind of help. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted April 27, 2009 Share Posted April 27, 2009 That wasn't a criticism, BW. More like shock treatment, in an attempt to generate other feelings beyond the softer ones. It was also a bit of black humour. How many adults do you know, use the word "poo"? Link to post Share on other sites
Author BW007 Posted April 27, 2009 Author Share Posted April 27, 2009 No,I understand your point and why you said that. It is hard when you start to do a little better and get slammed again by missing them. I miss her, despite all her crapiness, and I can't pretend I don't still love her and that it has all magically turned to hatred. ....But love has to be a two way street, and she has not been a loving person towards me anymore, in fact. It is not self pity that I am feeling about her, more of a case of feeling the loss too much and I miss the good parts of the old relationship. On this site I have noticed that when some guys get cheated on, our reactions are pretty similar and it seems we are horribly equipped to deal with it.What is with that? Link to post Share on other sites
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