horn4thor Posted January 6, 2007 Share Posted January 6, 2007 Is letting go. I have found peace. Link to post Share on other sites
Author horn4thor Posted January 11, 2007 Author Share Posted January 11, 2007 And then they start making noise at you. I couldn't get my ex to talk to me so I could resolve some issues surrounding our break up, despite earnest efforts to remain friends, I'd always get some excuse. I mention a girl, we're not even dating, and my ex is canceling plans to come see me so we can talk. I've been able to say what I needed to and I feel that the majority of my questions and issues have been answered or resolved. Funny, they get a sense that you're moving on and suddenly they feel like they're loosing you instead of the other way around. Link to post Share on other sites
riobikini Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 re: hornthor4: " The greatest act of love... Is letting go." I agree. But it's an act of love towards the promotion of greater health of your own wellbeing. It's not so much a selfish act, at all, as it is a necessary one for personal maintenance and stability: *you* are the person you must be responsible enough to always love -and look out for- first. Even if it means letting go of someone. -Rio Link to post Share on other sites
luvadj Posted January 14, 2007 Share Posted January 14, 2007 Is letting go. I have found peace. This is my first post, and to stumble across this first is amazing stuff. Without hijacking the thread, I will start another one for my problems, but this quote is powerful medicine for me right now....it doesn't offer hope, but strength. Right now, I need strength for what I am undergoing right now. More to follow in another thread. Link to post Share on other sites
LakesideDream Posted January 14, 2007 Share Posted January 14, 2007 Horn4thor, and Luvadj.... stop watching Lifetime on cable. The sooner you break the habit the sooner you will be able to enjoy breathing (and whatever you watched previously). Hopefully your conditions are temporary. Many of use went through a phase of "Noble Martyrdom". For some it lasted a few hours, (and a bottle of Scotch). Some of us men make careers out of being wronged spouses, often in the misguided hope that some other female will adopt them and "fix" all the wrongs. Generally those who take the second option just end up getting "fixed" as in emotional casteration. Whiny, whimpering men are not attractive to most women. Generally speaking, for men, "Letting Go" happens when you find a "New Piece". Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted January 14, 2007 Share Posted January 14, 2007 [QUOTE] Generally speaking, for men, "Letting Go" happens when you find a "New Piece". Believe me, it works the same way for women. That is what is helping me to forget! Link to post Share on other sites
miss snoopy Posted January 14, 2007 Share Posted January 14, 2007 Finding someone to take your mind of the ex works, evidently, but sometimes it can make things even worse, can't it? For e.g. if you're not really into the other person, you find yourself thinking about the good times you had with your ex. I'm going through that now and I wonder if my ex is too, as he too is meeting people and not gelling with them (we're not in contact but I know this) so it definitely works both ways. Link to post Share on other sites
MagnoliaJane Posted January 14, 2007 Share Posted January 14, 2007 True what Miss Snoopy says. I can feel pretty down after spending time with somebody I'm not into and miss my ex all the more... Sometimes it's safer to sit at home and watch a dvd alone Link to post Share on other sites
Author horn4thor Posted January 15, 2007 Author Share Posted January 15, 2007 Lifetime on cable, I know. But ya gotta let go sooner or later, I made the decision to let go. I had to stop worrying, to stop hoping for a reconciliation, to stop wishing things were the way the were a year ago, to stop wishing I could have fixed it when I still had the chance, I had to move on. With my last ex it took me forever to get over her, and getting with someone new was not the answer, I think it is what contributed to the end of my latest relationship, 3 years to the day after the last one ended. Letting go does not mean the pain goes away, it still takes time to heal, it does not mean that you stop thinking about her, it will still happen--it sneeks up on me. For me, letting go means that when I start to dwell on things I stop and focus again. In fact I haven't really given much thought to my ex all weekend, I was out with friends having a hell of a great time, it was only after I logged in here that I started to think about her again, but I've pretty much moved on from that now too. I am determined to learn as much about myself as I can from this; wisdom gained is often gained in pain and if its gonna hurt, I might as well get something from it. Link to post Share on other sites
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