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Heartbroken - can someone explain this?


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spaceraider234

Sorry it's long just need to explain it properly. I left my ex of about a year and a half about 3 months ago, due to him having a drug problem and all the heartache that comes with it, I loved him but I went through lies and heartbreak for months until I finally had enough. He was a very loving boyfriend however which made it harder. Well he had been messaging me nearly every day saying he loved missed me etc and would always initiate contact. I felt ok because I knew he still cared,

 

I thought we would get back together one day when he sorted himself out and things would be ok. I agreed to see him a few times but it didn't happen I felt like I didn't want to feel the way I did before and allow it to happen so I kept putting it off i was scared. Recently nearly about 2 weeks ago he messaged me after 3 days (we had an argument about money he owes me for a loan I took out to get him out of debt and he hasn't given me any) he said I hope your ok. I ended up saying I miss him and he said why only now and things went pear shaped from then. Hes been distant not messaging me back and acting weird. I confronted him and asked if there was someone else and he said no.

 

I just said I'll leave you to it as I think there is and left it. He messaged 2 days later saying sorry theres no one else I'm not interested in anyone I only acted how you were with me (short and cold) I didn't reply and then he messaged me this next day asking why I was ignoring him 3 times, i said i was trying to move on as I thought he had and he said well I haven't I wanted you (notice wanted) I messaged back and he didn't reply, cut a long story short I got upset and asked if I could go round to which he eventually said yes. I went over and it felt weird like he wasnt the same with me but said there was no one else when I asked him,

 

he asked me to stay and we got into bed and slept together, he was very cuddly afterwards and said I do love you and we talked about stuff. The morning I kissed him goodbye and he said have a nice day etc. I didn't hear off him all day so in he evening I said is that it then? To which he said no why and i asked to see him and he said i cant tonight and he would never have said no before. He said what about tomorrow? I said I still love and miss you and he said and I love and miss you too.

 

Basically there was this girl I had an inkling he was seeing so I tried to add her on Instagram and I asked who she was and he was like why have you tried to add her? So immediately I knew they were talking but he denied it came from her and a mutual friend of hers told him. I lost my **** and accused him of sleeping with her which he obviously denied and said it was all in my head, and kept saying this is silly.

 

I said I dont want you anywhere near me you've broken my heart f*** o** and he said if that was the case I should message her and tell her we slept together but she wouldn't care because it's not true and I would look silly and I didn't respond and he hasn't said anything else in a day and half. I dont know what happened or how he could go from messaging me saying he loves me so much and misses me to barely anything and then this happens it's like he doesnt care anymore and If he is seeing someone why wont he just admit it? I said if your not interested in me anymore just say and he was like look I am.

 

But his actions dont match and I just have a sick feeling in my stomach and think hes seeing someone which hurts as I thought he loved me. I was relieved when we broke up initially because he was a drug addict and owed me money and recently been on a holiday which he ruined from being drunk and aggressive etc. And felt better but I guess him pining over me made me feel better.

 

It hurts to think hes found someone who he thinks is better, she is older than him and has 2 kids, (he has 4 kids by different women and is 33, I am 25) he just loved me so much before and i dont know what's happened Some advice would be helpful. Thank you

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
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Spaceraider, you dumped him because he's a mess....and he's still a mess. That's all there is to it. Block him from contacting you and move on without him.

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He is 33 and already has 4 kids by different women, has drug, alcohol and money problems, and now may or may not be involved with another woman. Even if there was no other woman, the reasons you broke up with him is still ever present, (and they are big ones) getting back together but not resolving it will only lead to even more heartbreak until you are worn out or another breakup happens whichever comes first.

 

This guy is seriously bad news. I would say to move on and consider the money he owes you gone. I don't think you'll be able to get it back.

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