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He got cold feet?


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I was in a relationship with my ex for 3 years, two of which were long distance. We’ve known each other for 4 years though and have liked each other for all this time. We are both very young, I am 23 and he is 25.

 

We finally moved in together last year and after one year living together, he broke up with me, saying he is not ready for a relationship like this, that everything is too serious and that he can’t see us being together in the long term right now and he prefers to break up now so we could maybe have a chance in the future, because he feels that if we stay together, we will break up eventually.

 

He is my first boyfriend and I am his second girlfriend, but his first relationship was very immature and traumatic. He says he can’t be sure I’m the one for him when he hasn’t had other experiences and that he feels like there is a lot of things he needs to do by himself before settling down like this. He is kind of lost in life right now, doesn’t know what he wants to pursue careerwise or what he’s good at and says he needs to figure himself out.

 

I am devastated. I know that most of the times, when you break up like this, you end up meeting someone later and then it won’t feel so scary to be in a new relationship that isn’t so committed and we would never get back together... has anyone had a situation in which you broke up and got back together later when things in life were more figured out?

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Happy Lemming

He is 25, he wants to go "sow some wild oats"...

 

It rarely works out when a couple gets back together.

 

At this point, you should concentrate on "moving on" with your life, without him.

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He just found out what serious committed adult relationship is like, and he's not at all ready. Too young. You should just enjoy yourself a few years as well. Sorry you're hurting. You know, people's brains aren't fully mature until around the mid-twenties. Even then, it's a conspicuous lack of experience for many.

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