Broke up: different stages in life

[BusyBD]

Its been 1.5 months since he broke up with me via text, i never responded and immediately went no contact. Havent heard from him either.

 

Were both late 20's and dated on and off for more than a year. We supported each other's goals, talked about the future, and he asked me if i was ready to have kids. I said not now, i still need to go back to school (i just moved here 2 yrs ago so had to go back to school and pursue my profession) and find a stable job after. He said he wasnt ready too until he finds a stable job but doesnt mind having one with me in the future. But he wish i was already ready.

 

He finally landed a stable job, worked a lot of overtimes. He told me he's not too happy there, the workload is too much but cant complain much cuz hes making real good money. I encouraged him & kept him motivated. Right now I'm only working part time while processing papers for school.

 

On the month of the break up, I slept over at his house one weekend and he slept over mine the next. Things were really great. However I had troubles processing my papers because of some missing documents. Ive been telling him about it beginning of the month and how it stressed me out a bit but i had it taken care of. He told me how unprepared I was, i shouldve known about it, etc..we argued a bit but ended the phone call with love.

 

The next 2 days i didnt hear from him. On the 3rd day he sent me msg telling me we wont work out, i need time to get my life together and he cant wait for me.

 

I didnt see this coming. Will he come back? I did nothing but supported him when he was down even though he kept pushing me away. But how can he just let go that easily? I miss him but trying hard to keep in no contact.

[Million.to.1]

Doesn't sound like he was committed to a real relationship.

You say you were dating on and off.

 

If you can't talk about stresses in your life and mistakes/ flaws or anything negative with your partner without them saying "you need to get your life together" then it's not really a supportive partnership and there is no love there.

 

Stay in no contact. You will realise in time he did you a favour. You deserve better.

[BusyBD]

Doesn't sound like he was committed to a real relationship.

You say you were dating on and off.

 

If you can't talk about stresses in your life and mistakes/ flaws or anything negative with your partner without them saying "you need to get your life together" then it's not really a supportive partnership and there is no love there.

 

Stay in no contact. You will realise in time he did you a favour. You deserve better.

 

Yes, we were on and off because both times he lost his job and felt he need to be alone.

 

But I guess youre right. I really felt the connections between us was strong. I was more invested than he was. A little stress in the relationship made him change his mind quickly. Im more of the one who tries to fix things while he's not. Im staying in no contact for sure. I gotta focus on myself.

[LonelyHearted]

I wouldn’t hold out hope for reconciliation, especially if he’s not supportive. My ex also broke up with me over text and over being at different stages in life. He blamed himself though because he was the one who worked too much and needed to change while I was the one with my ducks in a row and ready to settle down. Six months later and we are still in no contact.

 

Admittedly, I still miss him and the feeling of being in love, but as time passes I can see that I was simply more invested in the relationship than he was. I was the one willing to work things out while he gave up. You, like me, needs someone who makes you a priority through the good and bad.

 

Best of luck in your journey. We will find the person for each of us in time.

[BusyBD]

I wouldnÂ’t hold out hope for reconciliation, especially if heÂ’s not supportive. My ex also broke up with me over text and over being at different stages in life. He blamed himself though because he was the one who worked too much and needed to change while I was the one with my ducks in a row and ready to settle down. Six months later and we are still in no contact.

 

Admittedly, I still miss him and the feeling of being in love, but as time passes I can see that I was simply more invested in the relationship than he was. I was the one willing to work things out while he gave up. You, like me, needs someone who makes you a priority through the good and bad.

 

Best of luck in your journey. We will find the person for each of us in time.

 

He hasnt had a stable job throughout his life until this job he has now. And hd isnt even very happy working there. He only thinks about money and earnings while i think about self improvement and doing what you really want in life. I left my temporary job where we met cause it doesnt help me grow as a person and i know i can do better than that by going back to school and pursue my passion.

 

I agree @LonelyHearted ! lets just work on ourselves, keep our heads in the game. Im slowly moving on. I have been checking his social media (were not friends/we dont follow each other) and found out hes been adding girls now. Lots of girls. Oh well!!!!!!!! Im not gonna keep tabs on him anymore. Theyre just another hard lesson we needed to learn.