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Not Feeling like a Priority?

Breaks and Breaking Up It happens to most everyone at some point in life! Share your experiences!

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Old 17th July 2018, 11:14 PM   #1
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 21
Not Feeling like a Priority?

I would like both female / male opinions.

I recently ended a relationship with a guy (we are both in our mid 20's) who pursued me and really showed me I was something special to him. Fast forward to the end of our relationship, I was no longer a priority to him - I had brought it up earlier in our relationship and communicated this to him. But even after we talked about this, slowly it just felt like the relationship was dwindling and I was not important to him anymore. Texts weren't as often, phone calls weren't as often. No longer hearing the "I miss yous" - we both travel for work heavily. I love you's were never exchanged in this relationship.

I think deep down this was a problem for me since we were dating for a year. He has never said this to a girlfriend either previous to myself. I'm afraid it was hard for me to fully fall in love with this person as well because our future seemed bleak with the fact that my race / religion would have been an issue for his parents. His parents never knew about me and etc. We never really fought and had a super respectable relationship and I cared for him. However, I ended things like 2 weeks ago because I just hit a point where I didn't feel like the special person I was like I did in the first half of our relationship. Why is it that logically I understand why I ended things, but also feel like my ego is bruised even if I ended things? He honestly seemed relieved when I broke up with him and agreed that things were more just routine oriented at this point. Our breakup was brief and I honestly could have asked him more questions, but now I regret not asking him "if / when he just stopped liking me?" because he didn't really explain why things for him weren't working anymore. He was just accepted the fact that I was ending things because I felt I wasn't getting what I need from him.

I have been keeping up with no contact but if he reaches out, should I even bother responding? I want to go the whole 30-60 days. I feel like this relationship could have had potential and I really did love him at one point, but I was too scared of falling in love with him because I was scared of getting hurt since it felt like he was pulling away from me as soon as I put my guard down. During our breakup, he did ask if we could be friends and I just didn't really have a real response for that. I feel like it's such a cop out to say that to someone. Almost like to make himself feel better.

Can a couple get back together with issues like this? There's a part of me that wants him to realize what he has lost. Or is it better to just keep it in the past and not even bother with this person?
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Old 17th July 2018, 11:31 PM   #2
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Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Northeastern USA
Posts: 32,756
The frequency of texts or even calls is not the right measure. Your bigger problems were no ILYs & a year in you hadn't met the family.

Just let this go.
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