Anxiety , coping with breakup after ...

[xxxyz1012]

Hi guys.

 

A year ago I met a girl that changed everything i believed in. Usually , i couldn´t trust other people, and i wouldn´t want anything serious, just hook ups. But that girl made me view things differently, and i begun trusting her. As a person, she was one of the great ones, exactly what i wished for.

Things were great, we were having many plans, we were doing great. Until , i finally got the news that my father would live maximum a year more, because of his terminal cancer. So that made me feel depressed , afraid , and I felt angry , and that made me get angry on her on small things, on everybody , maybe once or twice, and less . Nothing serious , to insult nor nothing, just being plain ,, Don´t care, or whatever,, , . But I apologized, and everything seemed ok. But i didin't told her that i was coping with a future grief, , so i wouldn't involve her in that.

So, after a month, she broke up with me for those mistakes. Everything was fine, she seemed to forgave , but after a month of that, she broke up with me , saying she is confused, and that she doesn't trust me.

And afterwards, my father passed away.

 

I don't know, what to do ... I asked for forgiveness many times.

Was it normal for me to be angry with her ?

 

Should I go NC ?

[N2017]

I am so sorry for your loss. I think in your effort not to involve her in your personal life you made her feel distant and pushed her away. She probably felt rejected and like you didn't trust her enough to confide in her about what was going on.

 

If you have apologized to her and told her why you were distant (meaning you explained about your father's passing) and she still wouldn't accept it, I think she is low and you should go no contact. Because as a girl, if a man told me that, I would take him back in a heartbeat and try to make him feel better to the best of my ability.

 

However, if you did not tell her in your apology, you need to apologize again and tell her the truth.

 

Hope this helps.

[xxxyz1012]

Thank you.

Not that i didin't want her to involve her in my personal life. I just didin't want her to feel the way i felt. So , I would had told her sooner or later.

 

I apologized first before knowing what was happining. She seemed to accept it, and all was forgotten. Until a month later, when she wanted to break up, that's when i told her about it and apologized again, saying why I wasn't myself.

[CantTakeMySmile]

Thank you.

Not that i didin't want her to involve her in my personal life. I just didin't want her to feel the way i felt. So , I would had told her sooner or later.

 

I apologized first before knowing what was happining. She seemed to accept it, and all was forgotten. Until a month later, when she wanted to break up, that's when i told her about it and apologized again, saying why I wasn't myself.

 

 

 

You were with a woman for a year, and you didn't mention to her that your dad had terminal cancer? Yes, that would upset me.

 

 

If you have apologized and explained how you will do things differently moving forward, then I don't see what else you can do.

[xxxyz1012]

You were with a woman for a year, and you didn't mention to her that your dad had terminal cancer? Yes, that would upset me.

 

 

If you have apologized and explained how you will do things differently moving forward, then I don't see what else you can do.

 

 

 

Of course i told her! She knew that my dad had stage 4 cancer. But when i got the news that he would live maximum a year more and his cancer became terminal, i didin't told her that.