Dodgersfan11 Posted July 12, 2018 Share Posted July 12, 2018 Its been a month since things have "ended" with this guy, but I still haven't gotten over him, its been 1 month of no contact, yet I keep thinking about him, and keep checking out his instragram/facebook to see if he has any pictures of a new girl. I know that I have to "keep busy" with hobbies and spend time with friends-but even spending time with friends or even talking isn't helping. I'm going out this weekend in hopes of meeting guys/exchanging numbers/going out on dates/ and having some fresh meat. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted July 12, 2018 Share Posted July 12, 2018 Its been a month since things have "ended" with this guy, but I still haven't gotten over him, its been 1 month of no contact, yet I keep thinking about him, and keep checking out his instragram/facebook to see if he has any pictures of a new girl. I know that I have to "keep busy" with hobbies and spend time with friends-but even spending time with friends or even talking isn't helping. I'm going out this weekend in hopes of meeting guys/exchanging numbers/going out on dates/ and having some fresh meat. Just make sure the 'fresh meat' knows that you're using them to mend a broken heart. You don't want to hurt another person in the process of healing your own hurt. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
N2017 Posted July 12, 2018 Share Posted July 12, 2018 All those things are good. I think also maybe reflecting on all the things that you DIDN'T like about him and the negative experiences you had. That makes you kind of realize that it's a blessing he's not in your life anymore. Keep doing what you're doing and have patience. Slowly it will fade away and you'll forget about it, but it does take time. Don't be surprised if you start comparing all these new guys to this guy in the beginning. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Noproblem Posted July 12, 2018 Share Posted July 12, 2018 Guys have feelings you know! Please don't use another guy as a way for you to forget your ex! Unless you have a mutual understanding and you are both looking for hook up and that's it. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted July 12, 2018 Share Posted July 12, 2018 I wouldn't know because I have never done it, but I think that sex with another man who I didn't have feelings for would only leave me feeling more depressed and lonely. I wouldn't do it. My friend, it's been a month. How long were you together? Give it time... Link to post Share on other sites
HiCrunchy Posted July 12, 2018 Share Posted July 12, 2018 Stop looking at his social media 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Mumbles Posted July 12, 2018 Share Posted July 12, 2018 Guys have feelings you know! Please don't use another guy as a way for you to forget your ex! Unless you have a mutual understanding and you are both looking for hook up and that's it. Yep, guys do have feelings and we need to be aware that guys-n-girls are not that different except superficially. However, broadly speaking, if you just go for a one night stand, chances are high the guy will find a way to get over it But do let him know first - thats just good manners I doubt too many player type guys will tell you to GTFO Link to post Share on other sites
Happy Lemming Posted July 12, 2018 Share Posted July 12, 2018 Yes, I had an old girlfriend contact me after her boyfriend dumped her. I think she really, really loved him. We had a mutual breakup and we were amicable about the breakup, so there were no hard feelings when she contacted me. She told me that she needed to sleep with someone to feel wanted and pretty, again. She also laid out the "ground rules" that this was temporary and in no way did she want to start a relationship with me, again. It was simply, two people having sex. It seemed to make her feel better. I wasn't dating anyone at the time, so I had fun. After about two months or so, she let me know she no longer needed me and I faded away. Hope this helps... all the best in feeling better. Blue skies... Link to post Share on other sites
Elpida. Posted July 12, 2018 Share Posted July 12, 2018 If you are ready, you genuinely want to, and are doing it for all the right reasons. Don't do it because you feel sad wondering what your ex is doing and force yourself into it. I've had rebound sex before and then felt horrible about it for days after but I'm quite emotional about sex. Casual sex or rebound sex is fine, just make sure the other person is on the same page too Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 12, 2018 Share Posted July 12, 2018 Looking at an EXs social media is the modern technology equivalent of the old drive past his house to see if he's home or who's with it. We all do it but it's bad for us. While I don't think hookups are the answer for everyone, I think you might find it helpful, Dodgersfan11. In the LA club scene I doubt there are many men who will get their hearts broken because of a ONS. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted July 12, 2018 Share Posted July 12, 2018 IMO, learn how to identify the 'fresh meat' sort, if not already savvy, and go to town on them. Avoid relationship-centric guys. We get damaged enough in life. Thanks. My exW used to call it 'going crazy' between her past marriages. She said it really helped. OK. Different strokes I guess. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Penguin_hugs Posted July 12, 2018 Share Posted July 12, 2018 Please give yourself time to heal... 1 month is really early on. I was with my ex for over 2 years and I spent the first 4 months after we broke up regularly crying and feeling low. It was 10 months after that ended when I slept with someone else (who was indicating he wanted to be my boyfriend... it only lasted 6 weeks of dating). I still think I wasn't ready at that time for properly dating but at least it got the sex out of my system. Even though it was a fairly terrible experience in retrospect! I met my now BF after 2 years of being single and only then was my brain in the right frame of mind and I had learnt how to be myself again and ready to be with someone else. Link to post Share on other sites
ElKay Posted July 12, 2018 Share Posted July 12, 2018 Harmless flirting is nothing wrong. Flirting with guys and seeing how many guys are interested in me helped my self-esteem after the breakup and I feel much better now! I personally didn't date until I was 23 so there's no way in hell that I'm going to waste time "finding myself" again when I'm perfectly content with who I am and I'm ready to meet a good match. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted July 13, 2018 Share Posted July 13, 2018 They always say the best way to get over someone is to get under another I have seen rebound sex/relationships last.. I had one last 4 years Link to post Share on other sites
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