Jump to content

Was I in an abusive relationship?


Recommended Posts

I still don’t know what happened and if it was just a bad relationship. At first my ex boyfriend was the nicest person that I have ever met, he gave me a lot of attention and love but then he started to being too controlling, questioning my clothes, checking my phone, mi notifications, accusing me of cheating without any reason. He got angry every time I went out with friends or family. He gave me the silent treatment a lot of times and said ugly things to me like “crazy” “you don’t have self esteem” “immature” and other hurtful things. Once he took me to a trip and then told me "i wish that i have spent the money in something else instead of bringing you"

He lied about everything but if i ever lied about something he would punish me with silence or threaten me with breaking the relationship, he also was indifferent to my pain or tears.

He never hit me but since the relationship ended I feel confused and don’t really know what happened.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Art_Critic

it's hard to tell if it was truly abusive from what you posted, certainly some of those things are controlling and seem abusive.

 

In the end it sounds much more unhealthy of a relationship and one that lowered your self esteem... isn't that more important ?

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
it's hard to tell if it was truly abusive from what you posted, certainly some of those things are controlling and seem abusive.

 

In the end it sounds much more unhealthy of a relationship and one that lowered your self esteem... isn't that more important ?

 

Yes ): I just want to understand what happened. I am seeing a therapist once a week and she told me it was an abusive relationship and she even called him a psychopath but I am having a hard time believing that he was that.

Link to post
Share on other sites

It certainly seems emotionally abusive...

 

Agree, any relationship that makes you feel "less than" is not a good relationship for you. Your partner should bring you joy and lift you up... Not drag you down and make you unhappy.

 

Glad you had the insight to recognize this for what it was and the strength to leave the relationship. Best wishes.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
Dodge_2168

Maybe he was insecure from past relationship and scared of loosing you. Did you ever speak about why he is acting like he was or just let it carry on.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm not sure how good labels for relationships are. And I really dislike someone being diagnosed by a person who has never met them.

 

What I would say is that his behaviour was "unacceptable". Unacceptable in any way, shape or form. When a partner starts acting like this, don't talk about it, don't see if you can help fix it - just get the heck away from them.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...