Need to vent....

[sweetjess1951]

So finally broke up with the bitter jerk I’ve been posting about for months now. Long story, short, he was previously married and she blind-sided him by cheating and leaving divorce papers on the counter before she left for work. All his family and friends have not had one nice word to say about her, but rather how horrible of a person she was by being selfish, manipulative, controlling and just mean.

 

I believe that she left him bitter about love and I’m the one who has been punished. First of all, he’s never said one bad word about her. Not that I expect him to spend his time cussing her name, but you’d think he have a little more anger towards someone who accepted his proposal for marriage and couldn’t even respect him enough to wait until she officially ended the marriage to spread her legs. HOWEVER, I travel for work, and I can’t even go on a trip that literally consists of meetings and then heading back to my room for the night and ordering room service without being accused of being shady or cheating.

 

He will randomly accuse me of the craziest things, but would be accusations that are consistent with how his ex-wife actually acted. She was always elaborately over-dressed and purposely changed to more revealing clothing when his friends came over, but I’m told I’m an attention wh*re because I make a post on Facebook asking for recommendations on a company that can fix my garbage disposal.

 

She was constantly controlling him and his money, telling him what he could and could not buy, even going as far as telling his niece (who was 8 at the time) that they would NOT spend $50 on an American Girl Doll for Christmas. BUT, even though I’ve never once told him he couldn’t buy things, asked him for money or expected anything from him, he told me I would have to sign a prenup if we got married because he saw “would could have happened”. Well I could get hit by a bus and die, but I’m not going to sit in my house for the rest of my life.

 

It got to the point where we would fight and he would tell me that he couldn’t make me happy, when making me happy was simply doing the things boyfriends should do. I never asked him to buy me things or constantly take me out. I mean, in the 9 months we dated, he never bought me flowers, we went out to dinner MAYBE 10 times, went to a movie once and did a sporting activity like bowling and topgolf 5 times.... IN 9 MONTHS. Yet, so many girls expect their boyfriends to treat them like a queen.

 

Anyways, it’s just sad that someone allows a hurtful event like a divorce dictate their relationships in the future. I mean, is bitterness something you can ever get over?

[stillafool]

Yes bitterness too can be healed. He will heal and hopefully do better in his next relationship. I'm happy for you that you have moved on and are now healing.