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Do exes always come back? Any stories of reconciliation and second chances


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Going through a breakup myself (in a previous thread), is it possible for people to get back together? I have no intention of getting back with my ex myself anytime soon. Perhaps another few years, if ever. But right now the need for validation in the form of him crawling back and regret is needed for me (even though I know it's an empty feeling). I think I just need to hear stories of possibilities.

 

A happy story actually:

 

I ran into a friend I hadn't seen in years and was surprised she was back with her ex. They had dated long-distance for a year, broken up for 5 years, then with right timing got back together, did long-distance again for 1.5 years and now they're back in the same city, building a home and getting married.

 

They always tell me that time and growth is needed to overcome initial breakup issues, and that second chances are always possible.

 

 

Does anyone have any stories of their own of returns or just never wanting to reconcile even when they do come back?

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I feel the same way too. I was unfortunately a rebound in a recent relationship which I also have a thread about.

 

I don't have a happy story of getting back together with an ex but I do have a story.

 

When I was 18, I told my childhood friend whom I crushed on for a numerous amount of years how I felt. She liked me for awhile and I think she still did back then but she was 16 and we were both young and all over the place with life and emotions. She was also into someone else so she turned me down. She was my first love and I wanted to be with this girl for the rest of my life so it broke my heart. And I had liked her for so long and contemplated for so many years on how to tell her how I felt about her..it was rough. But I really appreciate how she handled the situation. She was respectful and mature and never embarrassed me and because of that, to this day, we still hang out, talk once in awhile and are completely cool.

 

Anyway..

 

About 5 years after that, she saw me at our mutual friends' brother's wedding (We still saw eachother once a year or so at a party). Well into the evening after a few drinks, she confessed to me the feelings she had for me and how she didn't know how to approach me about them because it had been so long and we hadn't talked. It was something I always wanted to hear from her. I'm not even lying when I say I used to have dreams about a moment like that with her at one point of my life. But..5 years had passed and I had moved on and was in love with someone else and I didn't feel the same way anymore. I never thought I would turn her down but I did.

 

Things can happen.

Edited by Beachead
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I reconciled with my first serious girlfriend after 24 years of us going our own ways.

 

I was super happy to have reconnected with such a wonderful woman.

 

Then she left me for another man out of the blue and completely destroyed my trust and ego lol.

 

From the happiest time of my adult life to a nightmare in 6 months.

 

-Fin-

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Yes. They came back. By the time they asked for another chance, I was in love with someone new.

 

But, you are the back up plan in many cases. I had my high school ex tell me, and I qoute " I didn't know, what to do with you. You were so pretty and smart. So, I just kept my distance from you after the break up. I was stupid."

 

That's not back up plan. That's a young man who didn't feel we were a match for whatever reason. Most of the guys that broke my heart returned with hat in hand. But, life had kicked them in the butt, and they were down and out. They were returning to someone who made them feel like they were a god. It wasn't because they loved me so much and made a mistake.

 

Eventually you will move on and if you're investing in yourself. You will take this break up for what s; another life experience. It's nothing to hold on to. Better days a head.

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No not in my case the closest was my e wife but she came back and went hot and cold and then wanted a divorce. I agree wth the other posters about being a plan b. It makes sense they didn't want the relationship anymore. It may be the case that they regret it after but that's because nothing better worked out and or there immature and base love on someone else making them happy rather than it coming from within love compliments never works if it supplements.

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3 stories:

 

Mine. Got dumped. Begged for him to come back. He did. Got dumped a 2nd time. Weaned myself off. We tried again but it was such a shadow of what it was it only lasted 2 weeks & that was the end.

 

My college roommate. She had been with her BF since 7th grade. Senior year of college he dumped her because he wanted to play the field. After 6 months of that he came crawling back but she wasn't having it. He chased her for 2 more years. They ended up living together. She put him through med school. They have been married for over 26 years.

 

My friend's son. He dated a nice girl through most of H.S. Shortly before graduation, the girl dumped him citing his immaturity & her desire to enter college a free woman. 2 years after graduation from college the bumped into each other at a mutual HS friend's party. They started dating again & eventually moved in together. They are engaged & set to marry next summer. The girl told me she was glad they both had the chance to grow up & explore before settling down. She doesn't think they would have made it if they never dated anybody else.

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Yes it happens.

We broke up for a month and got back together and still are.

We want to be together for the long haul.

Not all paths to forever are the same.

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