Why is my ex going out of her way to make me jealous?

[Eddie Gonzales]

For the first many weeks of my ex's new relationship, there was nothing. No contact. Then she sent me a cryptic pic on snapchat to which I replied. She seemed very happy that I texted, and we texted back and forth for two hours. She complained about her life to me, that she was unhappy where she was studying and stuff like that. She's very interested in modeling, and since I'm a model myself, she asked if she could join one of my shoots to help out. I was a bit surprised, but agreed.

 

I had second thoughts about letting her come over to my job, but since the shoot was postponed, I told her about it and said I would "let her know when it'll be rescheduled."

 

I was very confused as to why she would complain about her life to me, especially since she had a new boyfriend, and why she wanted to meet up for that shoot like never before. But then this whole thing REALLY confused me.

 

I was getting DIRECT snaps from her on snapchat. FOUR DAYS IN A ROW. One was with her boyfriend when they were faceswapping, the second was with her boyfriend repairing a toilet, the third one was one where she was laying next to him, and the fourth one was… with him laying in bed with the caption "oh how could I not love him?"

 

They weren't on her Story, they were sent DIRECTLY to me. I sensed that she wanted a reaction out of me, but ignored it.

 

Then, some days later, I sent a group snap and she was one of the recipients and then I received direct snaps from her with a selfie, then her laying in bed, then another random one. I didn't react to that and the day after I receive yet ANOTHER SNAP OF HER SUPPOSED BOYFRIEND.

 

What is up with her? Why is she so desperate for me to see her relationship? And why did it begin right after I cancelled that meeting with her?

[LitTunnel]

Well, it's obvious she's very immature and insecure. Don't worry, she's not all that into you because if she was she would've been with you instead of that other guy. Ya, she could have feelings for you but the fact that she's decided to show it in that fashion (with a dude in bed) just goes to show her lack of empathy, integrity and just downright pathetic personality.

 

Dude, do yourself a favor and delete this bimbo from your life asap. She's the type that will cheat on you when things get rough and trust me you'll be in much deeper hell if you go on with this girl by then. I take it you're young...why on earth would you waste your time with this idiot? There are so many other women you can hook up with or get serious with. Ditch her for pete sake and watch her beg you back into her life and of course you're going to go back.

[scubasteve]

It's not more of you seeing her. It's her being controlled cause it gets her excitment rush that how you will react.

 

Idk your background with her but who broke up with who first

[elaine567]

I think she is using you to get her career off the ground and I also guess you are now her "friend", hence the telling you about her life and including you in people to send selfies to.

She sends you pics of the bf not to make you jealous but to show how "adult" you and she can be as you are now just friends in the true sense of the word.

 

You most likely do not figure as a love interest any more in her life, so she is happy to be a friend and happy for the attention you give her.

 

As she was the dumper, she will no longer be emotionally invested in you, so to her it is perfectly natural to have you as a friend, if you are willing to be one.

Whereas you, as the dumpee are always looking for any sign of interest from her, and interpret everything she does as having an ulterior motive. (she calls me => she still loves me; she sends me a pic => she wants to get back together).

 

For the dumper, exes make very good friends as they usually still care and who wouldn't want a friend around who really cares about them?

For the dumpee, they cannot be "just friends", as they are still hoping for more.

[Jagged100]

Because she's immature and enjoys the fact that she hurts you. It's a game to her. The best way to win is not to play, I learned that from past experience. Delete her of Snapchat and move on. She has problems and you don't have to deal with them anymore.

[Ieris]

If you send a snap back of you laying next to a girl, she would probably cry but I don't think you need to stoop to her level. Block and delete.

[marky00]

 

 

For the dumper, exes make very good friends as they usually still care and who wouldn't want a friend around who really cares about them?

For the dumpee, they cannot be "just friends", as they are still hoping for more.

 

No exactly, dumpees don't want a friendship that is one-sided because the other party (the dumper) has no care for them at all.

 

 

I don't know about you but I don't create or maintain friendships with people who don't care for my health and well-being or who don't value me being in their lives.

 

 

What you described is a dynamic early post break-up phenomenon but once a dumpee begins to heal the real reason why a friendship will never work becomes obvious to see.

[Grathblagg]

Every time she sends you a snapchat, say to yourself, "I'm so very lucky... that I dodged that bullet", and then don't respond, at all, ever.

 

Or, text back and forth, swallow her bait, and deal with a good deal of misery in the future, as she snapchats some other dude from the bed with YOU in it with her. Sounds like fun, right?

[Eddie Gonzales]

Or, text back and forth, swallow her bait, and deal with a good deal of misery in the future, as she snapchats some other dude from the bed with YOU in it with her. Sounds like fun, right?

Why do you think she'd do that to me?

 

She sent me another one today btw. AGAIN with her boyfriend and a caption that literally said "he's so amazing"

[LitTunnel]

Why do you think she'd do that to me?

 

She sent me another one today btw. AGAIN with her boyfriend and a caption that literally said "he's so amazing"

 

Dude, just block her. She's immature and has no integrity. But you're not listening so do whatever.

[Bromeo]

I usually try and give balanced advice, but I simply cannot in this case.

 

If your original post is accurate, she is truly terrible. If my ex was sending me anything to do with her and another man, I would sub-contract with either a coven of witches to curse her, or a witch doctor to ensure she burned in gehenna. Or both.

 

Find your cutest lady friend. Snap selfie together. Send to stupid game playing ho ex gf.

 

Caption, "best time of my life". End of text. Laughter ensues.

 

Some situations simply require a nonstandard response.

[Jagged100]

Why do you think she'd do that to me?

 

She sent me another one today btw. AGAIN with her boyfriend and a caption that literally said "he's so amazing"

Block and let it go. Stop wasting your time on this person. Yes it's easier said than done, but long term it's the best choice for you.

[Grathblagg]

Why do you think she'd do that to me?

 

 

Because it works? Instead of saying to yourself, "This girl has a screw loose!", you're wasting brain cycles trying to figure her out. You wouldn't do that if you didn't picture yourself in some sort of relationship with her. You'd block her.

 

Don't invite crazy into your life. There's enough random craziness in life to keep you busy.

[JGB]

My ex did the same thing after we initially broke up. The week after we split, she texted me at 7 in the morning, "I just want you to know I have someone else in my life now". Crushed me. Next day, she texted me a list why he's so much better than me, how he's more of a gentleman, kisses her ass all day long, stuff like that. Finishes it off by saying "He makes me way happier than you ever did".

 

That was all unprompted, and she was one who dumped me. There's no call to act like that unless the person is very insecure, very unconfident, and very disingenuous. 2 years vs 2 weeks, it isn't a comparison. She was just trying to get a rise out of me... I admitted to somewhat biting the bait and telling her how that guy is nothing compared to me and she'll never be in love with him like she loved me. It was stupid, but the break up was fresh and I was weak.

 

She texted me again recently how great he is and how much I suck, but I was able to brush this one off and it didn't bother me as much, and then another time when she got home from one of their dates. She's the one suffering now, not me. She's dead as far as I'm concerned.

 

I imagine your girl is the same. She wants to piss you off and make you blow your top. Cut her out of your life and move on, brother.

[keiji]

Why do you think she'd do that to me?

 

She sent me another one today btw. AGAIN with her boyfriend and a caption that literally said "he's so amazing"

 

That's outright cruelty. There's no need to look for deeper meanings in her behavior; hurting someone on purpose is mean, period.

 

I'm not into revenges, but Bromeo's advice sounds great. Follow it if you're feeling strong enough to have a little laugh at her expense (which she deserves) and block her once she throws the expectable tantrum, or block her straightaway and don't let her interfere with your healing.