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Your last relationship: How long did it last? Scale of 1-10 how badly did it end?


Breaks and Breaking Up It happens to most everyone at some point in life! Share your experiences!

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Old 1st August 2017, 6:08 PM   #61
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Ugh

Still pretty hard to deal with for me.. Id say 8/10

Dated 2 years, 2.5 months..

Went to bed happy with an I love you so much and woke up to a text saying goodbye. Haven't heard a word from her since.. 60 days ago.

If you dump someone, please at least do it like an adult..
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Old 1st August 2017, 7:50 PM   #62
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18 Months, we dated 2 months prior to that. It was all of a sudden, as I thought things were moving in a good direction and then bam. It was about 8-9 but after 6 weeks, I am down to about 4-5 and doing just fine. It sucks but, I really just wish her happiness.
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Old 1st August 2017, 10:57 PM   #63
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Lasted 5 1/2 months, but we dated unofficially for a few months before that. Were inseparable for years before that as close friends and co-workers who obviously had a thing for each other.

Breakup is a 9/10 for me. Things hadn't been perfect but they seemed to be getting better and I was actually more confident and committed because it seemed like she was dedicated to working through any issues. She vanished for a week at Father's Day, which is incredibly hard for me due to the loss of my father. I had also just lost my job and was pretty much living for the summer trips she and I had planned all year. She wouldn't have a convo with me and just said a whole bunch of really hurtful, mean things about me being inadequate and having no direction in life. I begged her to talk to me, but she just sort of unloaded and dodged via text for ten days and then broke up, saying she loved me very much but needed someone different.

Loved her madly and without limit and was crushed. Couldn't get out of bed for two weeks. It'll be six weeks tomorrow and I'm doing better but I feel like everything is just numb and still think about her constantly. Sadly, I can't imagine feeling normal or oblivious to her for a long, long time.
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Old 2nd August 2017, 12:40 AM   #64
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This wasn't recent but it was a level 10 on the break up scale.
Dated this woman for about a year and half and then we moved in together. We were going to build a future together and such.
1rst month I basically paid the entire rent. She was going through financial things so at first I understood.
2nd month it happened again. And I brought it to her attention. She proceeds to tell me I shouldn't "keep score" and I never do anything from the "heart". I tell her she's got to learn to work as a team. She then proceeds to tell me she can't do that. I look at her in disbelief and ask whats the point then of living together much less dating each other?
She looks at me funny and says she doesn't think she can live with someone who keeps score. And I move out. Tell I just want important thongs like clothes and personal papers etc. She can keep the TV,glasses,etc.
Next day as I'm leaving she's piling food into my suitcase that I bought weeks ago. I tell her I don't want the food. She won't hear of it and I get cearl,bread you name it thrust into my suitcase. Needless to say it was a long day lol.
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Old 2nd August 2017, 3:41 AM   #65
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Still pretty hard to deal with for me.. Id say 8/10

Dated 2 years, 2.5 months..

Went to bed happy with an I love you so much and woke up to a text saying goodbye. Haven't heard a word from her since.. 60 days ago.

If you dump someone, please at least do it like an adult..
No explanation or anything?
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Old 2nd August 2017, 5:13 PM   #66
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No explanation or anything?
Nope.. She just said I can't do this anymore and goodbye. I never got any closure and I think that's what's driving me crazy..
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Old 2nd August 2017, 5:56 PM   #67
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Nope.. She just said I can't do this anymore and goodbye. I never got any closure and I think that's what's driving me crazy..
That sucks. Have you tried contacting her?
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Old 2nd August 2017, 11:28 PM   #68
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That sucks. Have you tried contacting her?
Yeah 13 days later I broke down and called about 20 times and sent about 30 texts.. No reply.. So I decided to run a personal course of 90 days NC to get over her and heal and move on.. I'm on day 48 I believe, I'd have to check my laptop.. But yeah it's working.. Now I just don't want to hear from her when I've made good progress and moved on, like other people say happens..
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Old 3rd August 2017, 5:01 PM   #69
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Yeah 13 days later I broke down and called about 20 times and sent about 30 texts.. No reply.. So I decided to run a personal course of 90 days NC to get over her and heal and move on.. I'm on day 48 I believe, I'd have to check my laptop.. But yeah it's working.. Now I just don't want to hear from her when I've made good progress and moved on, like other people say happens..
She'll probably contact you after some time has passed. You guys spent 2 years together. There's no way she will ever forget about you unless you were just an awful awful boyfriend which I'm assuming you weren't. But yeah just going NC and giving it time is the best way to heal. You're a lot stronger than me. Me and my ex broke up exactly a year and a half ago and I'm literally just now starting to get over it.
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Old 3rd August 2017, 6:29 PM   #70
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Last relationship that went exclusive was last year, and lasting about 6/7 months (but complicated, and not based on rules most people have regarding the subject).

She screwed it up by messing around, and then trying to gaslight me.

I would give it a 3 out of 10 on how badly it ended. It wasn't a pleasant break up, but it was a good clean execution with no comebacks.

I didn't discuss her fooling around with someone else. As soon as I'd figured it out, I sent a text giving a lame excuse and ignored her messages and calls. That was that.

And as I'm quite careful about allowing women into my circles, and have good boundaries, she wasn't able to use my friends or family against me.

Took me several weeks to get myself going again, though. And It completely threw me off and on a wobble. Don't think that I really adjusted, and eventually ended up here again

Now my head is clear. My habits are broken. And it's time to do better than I ever did before.

Next (chapter).
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Old 3rd August 2017, 7:46 PM   #71
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Last relationship that went exclusive was last year, and lasting about 6/7 months (but complicated, and not based on rules most people have regarding the subject).

She screwed it up by messing around, and then trying to gaslight me.

I would give it a 3 out of 10 on how badly it ended. It wasn't a pleasant break up, but it was a good clean execution with no comebacks.

I didn't discuss her fooling around with someone else. As soon as I'd figured it out, I sent a text giving a lame excuse and ignored her messages and calls. That was that.

And as I'm quite careful about allowing women into my circles, and have good boundaries, she wasn't able to use my friends or family against me.

Took me several weeks to get myself going again, though. And It completely threw me off and on a wobble. Don't think that I really adjusted, and eventually ended up here again

Now my head is clear. My habits are broken. And it's time to do better than I ever did before.

Next (chapter).
How do you know she was messing around? And why not call her out on it?
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Old 3rd August 2017, 8:02 PM   #72
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How do you know she was messing around?

She had an "American friend" (female) who she knew from the past, or something. This friend was coming to stay with her, and she was actually complaining to me about it. That thing of having a friend, but also it getting on your nerves a bit... or so I thought.

I left them to it. Go sightseeing and all of that stuff.

A week later, we are in my place and she starts telling me about how her friend is actually a lesbian. She's saying this very indirectly, drip drip drip of information like a Japanese water torture, and it took time for it to build up in my mind.

Another week, and she is asking me "have you ever been cheated on before?". I told her I had, and that I dumped the b*tch. She backed away from the subject real quick, and now I'm knowing something is up.

Another day she starts bringing up the possible idea of threesomes. And now I'm on to her. She's trying to manipulate me, use my sexuality against me in giving her a free pass to cheat. And I know that guys have probably allowed her it in the past, because most men are like 14 year old boys regarding this subject.

So, I start going through her Facebook in an obsessive manner (something that I don't normally do). And I see this "American friend" pursuing her in a clever way. Smarter than the other orbiters.

That was it.

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And why not call her out on it?
What would be the point?
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Old 3rd August 2017, 10:00 PM   #73
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She'll probably contact you after some time has passed. You guys spent 2 years together. There's no way she will ever forget about you unless you were just an awful awful boyfriend which I'm assuming you weren't. But yeah just going NC and giving it time is the best way to heal. You're a lot stronger than me. Me and my ex broke up exactly a year and a half ago and I'm literally just now starting to get over it.
Yeah that's what I'm thinking.. She'll pop back up out of nowhere someday.. Not trying to toot my own horn or anything but yeah I was an excellent boyfriend to her.. Tried to give her everything I possibly could.. Wanted her to be happy no matter what.. Drove 70 miles round trip several times a week to be with her while working 40+ hours.. I was in love with this girl and she just vanished.. That's why I'm so confused and shattered.. Don't understand how someone can do that to somebody..

And of course I'm sorry to hear about your situation.. Glad we all have each other through this if nothing else.. I have my worse days.. I'll probably deal with this for 1-2 years I imagine.. I lost a high school sweetheart 10 years ago and it took me over 3 years to feel normal again.. Sucks
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Old 3rd August 2017, 10:23 PM   #74
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Lasted about five years.

Breakup was about 3/10. It hurt a little because I loved her, but it was time to go because there were things about her that were intolerable.
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Old 5th August 2017, 12:55 PM   #75
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Just over a year, 13 months. I'd say it was 7.5...

Told her I didn't love her any more because of how she treated me. She was no monster, but she wanted things her way and used to always make me apologize for anything I did wrong, very push me pull you, a bit of a manipulator. I just had enough in the end.

Been split up for 3 months, NC for 2 of them. I still want to message her sometimes and ask for us to give it another go, but I'm sure that could be the loneliness talking... I hope so, I do miss her.
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