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Day 5 of NC is Killing Me!


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Do they ever have regrets? I mean do they dwell on the negative issues or do exe's sometimes think of the positives in the relationship? Obviously i am exaggerating the positive so does this mean she will exaggerate the negative? Even if they are very proud people do they 'usually' make an effort to contact?

 

Simon

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BrotherAaron

Hang in there man.

 

The dumpers have to cope too. They usually have a head start, though. They have regrets, and they remember all of the fun times you've shared...

 

...but they made the decision to leave. They know that calling you and telling you that they miss you will only complicate things and make it harder to leave. She's putting on a strong front for you. Even if she cries at night, you won't see it, because she knows better than to show it to you.

 

That's what acceptance is about. If you accept that you two aren't going to get back together, then you'll realize that you need to show her your strong front as well. Don't let her see you coping. When you think about her, remember that she was in a relationship with you because she wanted to be, not because you forced her to be, and she must be hurt that it didn't work out.

 

I've had the fortune of having mutual friends who will tell me when she's asking about me, and worrying that I'm "too happy", so I finally realized that even the one who ends it still has to get over it.

 

You both got to avoid showing each other that you aren't happy because there's nothing worse than breaking down and hooking up with your ex only to wake up and go back to being broken up again and starting all over.

 

Even if I'm wrong, and she has no regrets, what difference does it make? You've still got to do the same thing, and stop trying to win her back by caring so much. Your job isn't to sit around waiting. Your job is to make yourself feel better. Don't worry about what she's doing. It gets hard, very hard... but you feel so much better every time you make it past that urge.

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Thanks Aaron your words mean a lot to me. Although to be honest I broke NC and probablt ****ed up big time. She told me she was getting over things so...............................but thanks Brother.

 

Simon

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