Doing NC and social media

[NCAC]

NC HELP!!!! Hey all! Need a bit of help! So was seeing this guy for a couple of months everything was great. Then all of a sudden it got a bit intense (on my part) and he pulled back a bit although he was head over heals for me and saw us going somewhere basically my behaviour scared him off.

 

Anyways he ended it there about two weeks ago. Basically did no contact then every couple of days he would message me, like my pics on Instagram etc I just ignored it. Then last week he replied to my Instagram story etc. On Monday we met up to get my stuff I had left at his and that was that.

 

I got home that evening and send him a nice message and saying buy but of course he didn't reply. I've been putting up Instagram stories (I don't use snapchat) and he's been viewing them. Then on Friday he viewed my story and instantly went to my Instagram and liked a pic of mine. Then today Sunday he favourited a tweet of mine on Twitter, something he's not done since like middle of sept. I was the only tweet he liked from what I can see, why bother going out of your way so I would get the notification? It will be a week NC tomorrow.

 

Thoughts on all this?

 

Is it a good idea to keep putting up stories on my Instagram knowing well he is going to see them?

[sooshi]

Just block the guy on social media and let all of the drama and endless analyzing be done.

[NCAC]

Thanks for the reply. Yeah I think I'm going to have to do that.

 

Although would you imagine he is just trying to play games with my head?

 

OF all the peoples pics to like why bother liking mine?

[Zahara]

Thanks for the reply. Yeah I think I'm going to have to do that.

 

Although would you imagine he is just trying to play games with my head?

 

OF all the peoples pics to like why bother liking mine?

 

You are playing games as well. Trying to bait him with your Instagram stories hoping something will click in him and he'll want things the way they were.

 

If he wants you, he'll show you with significance not with liking pics on a website. Stop placing value on silly stuff like that.

[NCAC]

Very True, I guess I'm just putting up the stories as I usually would.

 

just don't get why he feels the need to send a notification to my phone and get my head wondering and confusing me all over again!

 

Does NC work at all for getting them to contact you? Is him liking my pics a way of him trying to initiate contact?

[Zahara]

Very True, I guess I'm just putting up the stories as I usually would.

 

just don't get why he feels the need to send a notification to my phone and get my head wondering and confusing me all over again!

 

Does NC work at all for getting them to contact you? Is him liking my pics a way of him trying to initiate contact?

 

Put up your stories but stop analyzing why he's liking them. He ended it, so treat it as such unless he comes and communicates to you that he has changed his mind. Anything other than that are ego, attention grabbing games.

 

If he's confusing you, block him. If he's ambivalent, shut him out. It's unreliable and you don't need that in your life.

 

NC is to help you move on. It isn't used as bait to provoke them into contacting you.

 

If liking your pictures is the best way he knows how to make contact, then it would be another reason for you to move on.

[NCAC]

Thank you for those words of wisdom you're so right. I just needed to vent. Its though and hard to comprehend he's just playing childish games now and being evil with my emotions.

 

No sure if this makes a difference but he's been on anti D for about 10 years since he was a teen, does this block out ones emotions towards others and how they feel themselves?

[Zahara]

Thank you for those words of wisdom you're so right. I just needed to vent. Its though and hard to comprehend he's just playing childish games now and being evil with my emotions.

 

No sure if this makes a difference but he's been on anti D for about 10 years since he was a teen, does this block out ones emotions towards others and how they feel themselves?

 

Who knows why he behaves this way but having this information is enough for you to shut the door and move away from this. It doesn't matter whether meds have affected him or if he's just being an immature person. It doesn't change your situation.

[NCAC]

Yes Im sure the meds make a diff and I really do need to shut the door on the a**hole now!

 

Boys and their games eh!!!! The minute the guard comes down things always take a horribly wrong turn!!

[Zahara]

Yes Im sure the meds make a diff and I really do need to shut the door on the a**hole now!

 

Boys and their games eh!!!! The minute the guard comes down things always take a horribly wrong turn!!

 

At least it's only two months in. Thank your lucky stars you didn't invest anymore than what you already have -- it would have hurt you even more.

[aloneinaz]

Stick to the facts ma'me! He ended it w/you. Said beat it kid.

 

The good news. It was a very short R/S. It fizzled out very quickly which speaks volumes about the lack of compatibility. You should be "over" this quickly.

 

What to do? Block him on social media, your phone, etc. Don't have any means for him to reach you. Don't engage with someone who's kicked you to the curb. You owe him nothing now. He said he didn't want you in his life. Give it to him. ANYTIME you respond to these middle school, childish games, it strokes his ego and makes you look weak. Find your pride and self worth sweetie. Vanishing from his life will knock the chip of his shoulder.

 

Chill out for a few weeks then get back on the dating horse.

[hippychick3]

Move on and stop analyzing everything he does. It doesn't matter at all why he is doing what he is doing.

 

He is not the one for you. You don't want the guy who breaks up with you. Guys who really want a girl do not play games. You deserve better.

[NCAC]

Stick to the facts ma'me! He ended it w/you. Said beat it kid.

 

The good news. It was a very short R/S. It fizzled out very quickly which speaks volumes about the lack of compatibility. You should be "over" this quickly.

 

What to do? Block him on social media, your phone, etc. Don't have any means for him to reach you. Don't engage with someone who's kicked you to the curb. You owe him nothing now. He said he didn't want you in his life. Give it to him. ANYTIME you respond to these middle school, childish games, it strokes his ego and makes you look weak. Find your pride and self worth sweetie. Vanishing from his life will knock the chip of his shoulder.

 

Chill out for a few weeks then get back on the dating horse.

 

 

Thanks for your input! Luckily I haven't replied to anything from his little games. I got my stuff back off him last Monday and that was it.

 

Its nice to be abel to vent here I'd say my roommates are about to evict me from the house ha ha

 

I know I should be over this v quickly but we had a very very strong connection and I basically scared him away so somewhat feeling very guilty about this all cause its my fault which just adds fuel to the fire

[NCAC]

Move on and stop analyzing everything he does. It doesn't matter at all why he is doing what he is doing.

 

He is not the one for you. You don't want the guy who breaks up with you. Guys who really want a girl do not play games. You deserve better.

 

Thanks hippy chick. You're so right i honestly deserve 100 times better and I know that myself I really do, I think its the fear of rejection that delays people from moving on. social media etc these days is a killer too.

 

Any recommendation on some self help books, or positivity etc?

[Nadine123]

Hello

 

You should try reading power of now, its an awesome book that will make you get over his easily and improve your self worth.

[NCAC]

Thanks so much nadine I will look into it.

Is it something similar to the secret?

[NCAC]

Ugh I changed my FB picture last night and low and behold he literally liked it within a minute. Literally the first to like it ugh talk about being subtle fml

[Nadine123]

Him liking your picture doesnt mean anything. This is just a strategy for him to keep himself in your mind so you dont get over him. He sounds like an immature kid to be honest. He knows your number, if he liked you or wanted to be with you, he knows what should be done and you know what you deserve,

 

I completely understand what its like to be holding on to any single sign you get. I did the same and didnt get better until I blocked him from all my social media. Isnt it obvious this guy isnt serious about you?

 

and yes its similar, but the power of now is alot better

[NCAC]

Thanks nadine you also are speaking some wise wise words.

As you all know it's easier said than done. I really am trying but he seems to just keep popping up. I don't deserve that at all but you can't help who you fall for etc.

 

I'm feeling very lonely at the moment. Lots of my friends have moved away

Or have boyfriends so they arnt around. Just feel like I'm going into a deep hole

I'm stressed, and drained. My sleep pattern is all over the place. TBH I think it's just the rejection and the fact that it's all my fault that's killing me slowly here.

 

I'm an emotional wreck at the moment and I don't even know why it's just my eyes keep welling up. I feel I have no one to talk to and just feeing pretty lonely which isn't nice as I'm sure he all know.

 

I know I am a very good honest person who deserves the world. I've never been disloyal or cheated yet I always seem to get into these situations where I leave my guard down and bam I'm the one that gets ****ed over.

[Nadine123]

Its not your fault. Many couples go through problems and if he really wanted you he would have stuck around to work things out. That's what men who really want you do Also, blaming yourself is completely normal, its part of moving on by the way so that is a good sign

 

It's normal and I understand. I moved to a new city for my ex and I knew noone here. I found that joining many activities (yoga for example, trust me it helps) and reading takes your mind alot. It will be hard now but a couple of weeks from now you will look back and laugh at how sad you were for nothing.

 

But you wont move past this if you dont remove him from social media. He doesnt want to be with you and you deserve better, and you will find better.

[NCAC]

Thanks Nadine, I need a kick up the arse at the moment ha ha .

 

You know yourself this stuff takes times, its nice to be able to vent on here. MY friends are about to disown me. I know its a mindset thing too that you just need to snap out of. Just feels like a lot has happened in the last few weeks from high to very low. Just unhappy n my job and lonely so just leaves you feeling a bit blue when you'd just love a cuddle! But at the end of the day he doesn't want me and with him being on meds I am prob better off in the long run (not that there is anything wrong with that) I just mean his moods would prob be hit and miss and thats a lot to deal with in itself.

[NCAC]

Can anyone help?

 

So tbh I completely forgot to block him cause I stopped thinking about him.

 

I went out for a dinner last night with a mate and put up a pic of my pizza then

He DM me saying miss you. I ignored it then an hour late he message me on FB saying 'hey' I ignored it but wrote back around two hours later saying 'what's up?' Then he goes how you and I didn't reply for. Then he replied to another story about ten mins later with a sad face in a DM. I goes 'what's that for ' he goes you look cute and I said why would u do that face and he said I miss you.

I saidto answer your FB message I am great how are you.

 

He goes I'm grand..

 

Thoughts ?

[Nadine123]

Im pretty surprised you are still replying to him. The more you linger on this the more hurt you will be. Up to you

[hippychick3]

Stop replying to him and get back out there...date other people and forget this guy. Block him now so you can move ON.

 

He broke up with you. Unless he is coming to your door begging your forgiveness at his terrible mistake and clearly telling you he wants to get back together and will do whatever it takes to show you that (and even then I would probably not want him back), he does not want you back. He is giving you breadcrumbs and you're lapping it up. He's using you to feed his ego. Surely, you deserve better than that!