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He owes me money, how can I get it back?


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Hi everyone, it has been forever since I last posted on this forum and a lot has changed in my life. I was with a guy (I am 23 and he is 39) for almost two years, thought I loved him, thought he loved me but now I realise that the whole relationship was nothing but a big mistake. He is a narcissist who constantly manipulated me but at the time I didn't see it.

 

We ended our so called relationship a few weeks ago because I didn't get an abortion… yes, I am pregnant and he is the father. As of now I am actually 7 months along but he said he doesn't want anything to do with me or the child which I no longer have a problem with because I know it is for the best. He cant be trusted and my family is actually concerned that he will do something crazy and harm me (he has never been physically abusive with me in the past however he grew up in a drug house with lots of violence, most of his family was killed due to gang violence and he was homeless as a young child…because of all he has seen and been thru my parents feel like he is unpredictable and is capable of doing bad things) anyways when we ended things it wasn't on good terms and he told me to better keep his name off the birth certificate because things would get ugly if I do.

 

My main question has something to do with money, a lot of money. He told me he wanted to help me make more money and said he can invest money for me. Now I didn't feel comfortable with the situation but was stupid enough to let him manipulate me and pressuring me into doing it anyways. So I gave him 15 thousand. He then said I would get 19 thousand back next summer. B

 

ecause we no longer are together I told him that I no longer care about the 19k and the deal and that I just want my 15k back now but he keeps telling me no and that I will get the money next summer. I do not trust him anymore and I need my money back but I don't know what I can do. I have screenshots proofing everything but my family said it is not like I could go to the police because I gave him the money.

 

Does anyone know what I can do to get my money back? I really need it especially now that I am gonna have to provide for my baby boy

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You'd have to sue him in civil court. Were there contracts etc. that detailed the specs of the investment deal? Any provisions for backing out/recovering those investments?

 

If he's a con man he likely doesn't have it anyway, at least in any recoverable form.

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You'd have to sue him in civil court. Were there contracts etc. that detailed the specs of the investment deal? Any provisions for backing out/recovering those investments?

 

If he's a con man he likely doesn't have it anyway, at least in any recoverable form.

 

I have nothing on paper but I have a bunch of screenshots where he tells me how much money to give him and how much money I'll get back

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Sorry, you probably got scammed. You could see a local lawyer and explain all the details, but most likely they will be sympathetic but explain that there's nothing you can do. Even if you did take him to court, his "defence" will probably be that you gave him the money to invest and he lost it in the investment scheme and doesn't have it any more. Investments have risks, especially 15k to 19k which is an interest rate of 26%! That kind of investment falls under the "too good to be true" category and is either extremely risky or illegal (given his past, most likely the latter).

 

Put his name on the birth certificate and make him pay child support. That is all you can do really.

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Cheerbabe93,

You need to take out a civil action against him to get your money repaid.

 

In UK this can be done via what is known as a Small Claims Court. However, they can only award payments up to £10,000.

 

If you are in USA then you'll need to check how much you can sue for in the equivalent type of Court. ( Judge Judy ! )

In the meantime I'd print out those screen-shots that you have as evidence.

 

Good luck. x

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I have nothing on paper but I have a bunch of screenshots where he tells me how much money to give him and how much money I'll get back

 

What Pete said - you're probably out of luck. No enforceable contract means it's virtually uncollectable. E-mail chains don't really count as a binding agreement.

 

Just learn your lesson (a very expensive one no doubt) and don't ever do that again.

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jen1447,

 

I'm not in USA but surely the OP has some kind of contract?

 

Surely a visit to a solicitor/lawyer is worth a try?

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Surely a visit to a solicitor/lawyer is worth a try?

Absolutely, she has nothing to lose since the initial consultation is usually free. But I wouldn't hold up much hope.

 

Screenshots are very easily doctored so I can't see them holding much weight in court if the defendant simply says no I didn't say that she must have made them on photoshop or something.

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jen1447,

 

I'm not in USA but surely the OP has some kind of contract?

 

Surely a visit to a solicitor/lawyer is worth a try?

 

Yeah a consultation's worth a try, if nothing else just to exhaust all options, but like Pete said I think they'll just sympathetically say she doesn't have a case.

 

It looks like she has no contract at all, as email doesn't suffice and she has nothing else. She'd need sth binding and enforceable, like a signed and notarized document that explicitly states what the terms are and that her investment's recoverable under x-y-z conditions. Otherwise it's bscly like handing someone a wad of cash - you're free to do that but don't hope to ever get it back.

 

She might have a better case criminally w some sort of investment fraud charge, but even that's unlikely to go anywhere and prob wouldn't result in her getting any money back.

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Absolutely, she has nothing to lose since the initial consultation is usually free. But I wouldn't hold up much hope.

 

Screenshots are very easily doctored so I can't see them holding much weight in court if the defendant simply says no I didn't say that she must have made them on photoshop or something.

 

 

I'm not in the US I actually live in Germany. I just did some Google research and apparently it doesn't matter that I don't have a written contract because screenshots in which it is clear that he got the money and that he would give it back are enough and accepted in court.

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Besides, he hasn't broken the terms of the "loan" / "deal" yet. He said that if you gave him 15k, he would return 19k next summer. Not all investments can be easily cancelled. Most likely he has spent the money on drugs and even if he wanted to, he couldn't return the original 15k until he's pushed it all. That's really the only investment that would give a 26% return.

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Pegnose,

This is what I was wondering about :confused:

 

OP, if you are still with us, please get a consultation with a solicitor/lawyer/attorney ASAP.

 

In UK you can get a half-hour consultation for free. Surely you can get the same in Germany?

 

It's worth a try.

 

Good luck x

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Besides, he hasn't broken the terms of the "loan" / "deal" yet. He said that if you gave him 15k, he would return 19k next summer. Not all investments can be easily cancelled. Most likely he has spent the money on drugs and even if he wanted to, he couldn't return the original 15k until he's pushed it all. That's really the only investment that would give a 26% return.

 

 

I know that but he claims to have millions of dollars and I told him I'm not interested in the deal anymore. Just want my 15k back which shouldn't be a problem for him to give me back since he's got sooooo much money anyways. I never gave him the money as a gift so I'm assuming it's still mine and I was under the impression that I can get it back if I want to. The problem is also that you can't talk to him, I've tried and so has my family but he starts theatening us

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I know that but he claims to have millions of dollars and I told him I'm not interested in the deal anymore. Just want my 15k back which shouldn't be a problem for him to give me back since he's got sooooo much money anyways. I never gave him the money as a gift so I'm assuming it's still mine and I was under the impression that I can get it back if I want to. The problem is also that you can't talk to him, I've tried and so has my family but he starts theatening us

 

Then why did he need to borrow any money from you to begin with?

Please tell me you didn't actually believe that.

 

Go and speak to a lawyer. Explain the situation and show them the screenshots. Keep any proof of the threats he's made. A good lawyer will be able to tell you if you have any hope of getting your money back. Sorry to say, but you are probably out of luck.

 

If he continues to make threats, notify the police.

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Then why did he need to borrow any money from you to begin with?

Please tell me you didn't actually believe that.

 

Go and speak to a lawyer. Explain the situation and show them the screenshots. Keep any proof of the threats he's made. A good lawyer will be able to tell you if you have any hope of getting your money back. Sorry to say, but you are probably out of luck.

 

If he continues to make threats, notify the police.

 

He didn't borrow the money from me. He said he can invest it for me to help me make more money cause I only have a minimum wage job currently. He never once said that the money was for him or that he would use it to buy something

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Yeah, he doesn't have millions of dollars. He probably doesn't even have $20 atm.

 

I'd be surprised about the legal standing but I don't know anything about German law and I guess Germany is a pretty socially progressive country, so by all means go talk to a lawyer. If you actually have a case, great. (Still not sure how you'd get any money tho if he doesn't have any ....maybe some pissant garnishing arrangement where he pays you 10% of his custodian wages for 3 months before he falls off the grid and defaults.)

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Yeah, he doesn't have millions of dollars. He probably doesn't even have $20 atm.

 

I'd be surprised about the legal standing but I don't know anything about German law and I guess Germany is a pretty socially progressive country, so by all means go talk to a lawyer. If you actually have a case, great. (Still not sure how you'd get any money tho if he doesn't have any ....maybe some pissant garnishing arrangement where he pays you 10% of his custodian wages for 3 months before he falls off the grid and defaults.)

 

According to the Internet it should be pretty easy for me to get the money back. I've found people's posts who went to court because someone owed them $80. You have to print out an online form and fill it out then send it to your local court. They will then send a letter to my ex giving him 14 days to pay me my money back. If he can't do that he will get a second letter from the court extending those first 14 days to another 14 days and if he still doesn't give me the money back they will send a court officer to his house. And I'm assuming he would take his expensive shoes and watches and anything else that has enough value

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You go for it Cheerbabe93,

 

Let us know how you get on - but get some professional advice for starters :)

 

Good luck x

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I'd ask a lawyer rather than continuing to ask the Internet.

 

Call a lawyer now.

 

I do hope you're able to reclaim at least some of your money.

 

Take care.

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I'd ask a lawyer rather than continuing to ask the Internet.

 

Call a lawyer now.

 

I do hope you're able to reclaim at least some of your money.

 

Take care.

 

I was hoping someone had experience with this issue or had similar problems in the past and could give me advice or let me know how it went for them. That's all

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I don't know the laws governing the father's liability for fathering a child out of wedlock. That's where one needs to be looking. Hopefully he has a job.

 

Good luck to you.

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I don't know the laws governing the father's liability for fathering a child out of wedlock. That's where one needs to be looking. Hopefully he has a job.

 

Good luck to you.

 

He's a professional basketball player

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You need a lawyer.

 

Small claims court in Germany is called "Mahnverfahren" but it is good only for claims up to €5000 and this exceeds that amount.

 

Frankly, I doubt you will get a lawyer to take the case because it would be looked upon as an "investment" as one does with the stock market, with no guarantee of a return. You might be able to go after him for fraud, however, and definitely sue him for child support....

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He's a professional basketball player
you won't have any trouble getting a lawyer. You may not even need one, except to hold his feet to the fire. I take that back. you need one Edited by whatnot
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