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2 years later, changed for the better?


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It's been 2 years since my ex-girlfriend borke it off. It's still feels like yesterday tho.. In 2 years time a lot of things happened. I went from an emotional wreck still believing in the rekindling of our love to a somewhat calmer, more mature person.

 

I still have a lot of issues and this girl is still in the back of my mind. But I can sense that I've changed. My look at life has become less playful, but I have learned a lot along the way.

 

During our first months a part from each other I still chased her a lot. And afterwards I know she somewhat used me, she never was a bitch to me, but I can tell from the signs that I was an emotional crutch to her.. she went from "I Love you but I'm not in love with you." and contacting me frequently to just fading away out of my life.

 

What I am trying to say is that altough she somewhat drained me, I still after two years have the feeling that I want to make amends for all the childish mistakes I've made. I want to show her how I became a man, became someone that wants to take care of her instead of taking for granted. Still after all the bull**** we, well, I went through, I still feel like I need another shot with her..

 

Does that make me a fool? Why do I still want this girl that much? Why do I have the feeling that she's dating a guy that isn't right for her? Why do I have the feeling that I know what she wants now? Realising that that's exactly what I want!

 

For the record, I'm not contacting her anymore, but I do still think about her every effin day. She casually slips into my mind, even with all the distractions.

 

Bottom line, I want to show my love so goddamn much, I want to make her feel the love that's in me but that couldn't get out when we were together.

I want to make her want to be with me..

 

Any people out there that catch my drift, and how do you deal with it?

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Show your love to someone new when that time comes.

 

I understand how you feel, but you can't go forward by going back.

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Yeah, by reading your post. It made it feel like you made those changes in your life for HER and not for you. That's was the wrong way to go about making those changes. Plus, by dedicating yourself to making those changes with her in mind, it kept you on the hook for her.

 

 

Dude, two years have gone by and you're still carrying a torch for her and she's probably moved onto someone new. Dude, I think t's time to let go. If you have made positive changes in your life, then the girl in your next relationship will benefit from it. But, there's a reason why our Ex's are our Ex's.

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I have to disagree Chi town. The changes that I made were changes that had to be made. With our without her. It's just a shame that I had to give up a girl like that before realising how I was living my life and treating people close to me.

I was an arrogant jerk, I'm not anymore. I really have changed, not for her but because of her. There is a difference.

 

But I do agree with the fact that I should use the changes for myself and for my future girlfriend. It just seems I'm still after all this time somewhat hooked up on her. I can easily have other girls, I know I'm worthy of love, but I have a hard time falling in love. But when I do, then I have an even harder time letting go.

 

It's a ****ed up situation, and I know I need to let go. I'm not going to try to win her back or anything, I just have this feeling that I need to show her things can be different, but reality bids me to believe that the past is the past.

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I have to disagree Chi town. The changes that I made were changes that had to be made. With our without her. It's just a shame that I had to give up a girl like that before realising how I was living my life and treating people close to me.

I was an arrogant jerk, I'm not anymore. I really have changed, not for her but because of her. There is a difference.

 

But I do agree with the fact that I should use the changes for myself and for my future girlfriend. It just seems I'm still after all this time somewhat hooked up on her. I can easily have other girls, I know I'm worthy of love, but I have a hard time falling in love. But when I do, then I have an even harder time letting go.

 

It's a ****ed up situation, and I know I need to let go. I'm not going to try to win her back or anything, I just have this feeling that I need to show her things can be different, but reality bids me to believe that the past is the past.

 

I think you should give it a shot. Not because it's something I would do, but because its been two years. I don't think you're going to be able to move on unless you can prove to yourself that you tried getting her back. Reach out to her and see what happens, but don't bring up the past relationship. Just been funny and playful and soon enough ask her out for coffee. Good luck.

 

Although I think you should of went on a few dates in those 2 years just so you wouldn't be hung up about her if she didn't take you back.

Edited by Jonp219
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*I just have this feeling that I need to show her things can be different, but reality bids me to believe that the past is the past.

 

*I think you know yourself that this can't be done.

 

You do, don't you?

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*I think you know yourself that this can't be done.

 

You do, don't you?

 

Doesn't it depend on what he did?

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If you can deal with the potential and likely rejection you are going to face here, go for it.

 

This isn't going to go well, but maybe you need this kick to finally move on from her.

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Damn, I also think about her often but your post makes me uneasy because I

know what kind of torment it is.

 

I expected some happy success story.

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reddragon588
It's been 2 years since my ex-girlfriend borke it off. It's still feels like yesterday tho.. In 2 years time a lot of things happened. I went from an emotional wreck still believing in the rekindling of our love to a somewhat calmer, more mature person.

 

I still have a lot of issues and this girl is still in the back of my mind. But I can sense that I've changed. My look at life has become less playful, but I have learned a lot along the way.

 

During our first months a part from each other I still chased her a lot. And afterwards I know she somewhat used me, she never was a bitch to me, but I can tell from the signs that I was an emotional crutch to her.. she went from "I Love you but I'm not in love with you." and contacting me frequently to just fading away out of my life.

 

What I am trying to say is that altough she somewhat drained me, I still after two years have the feeling that I want to make amends for all the childish mistakes I've made. I want to show her how I became a man, became someone that wants to take care of her instead of taking for granted. Still after all the bull**** we, well, I went through, I still feel like I need another shot with her..

 

Does that make me a fool? Why do I still want this girl that much? Why do I have the feeling that she's dating a guy that isn't right for her? Why do I have the feeling that I know what she wants now? Realising that that's exactly what I want!

 

For the record, I'm not contacting her anymore, but I do still think about her every effin day. She casually slips into my mind, even with all the distractions.

 

Bottom line, I want to show my love so goddamn much, I want to make her feel the love that's in me but that couldn't get out when we were together.

I want to make her want to be with me..

 

Any people out there that catch my drift, and how do you deal with it?

 

I too am at 2 years (well, just a couple months under it, but whatever). You already stated that you chased her, but you're still apart. If it didn't happen then, it wouldn't happen now.

 

I've been having some bad thoughts about trying to reach out again recently. But like you, I know that I've attempted in the past to do so and it didn't happen then, and wouldn't happen now.

 

I think about her every day as well. But that is just natural. Keeping living your life for YOU and you'll find someone else that will make you just as happy (and probably more) eventually. Then you'll be able to move on completely.

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If you can deal with the potential and likely rejection you are going to face here, go for it.

 

This isn't going to go well, but maybe you need this kick to finally move on from her.

 

No, I have no intention of wasting any more time on this girl. I just posted here to see if any other people, after all this time, still have this craving.

 

I know I'm not over here, I silently still love her. But I do am over the fact that we won't be together anymore.

 

Just shows that love isn't black or white, it's one big fat gray blur.

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