lance69 Posted December 24, 2014 Share Posted December 24, 2014 Datin a girl for 2 months.. she starts corporate job.. making plans becomes difficult, she offers to meet up since she's free one week... fri and Sunday. fri night she ask my plans i let her know and she out with her mate in the same area.. i make a joke and ask were u.. she says she thinkin of heading home.. since she has work to do 2moro.. sat night i try to confirm cinema date plans and she's unsure due to exam she's revisin for.. she says she will let me kno and says it literally the last week, I respecet that say its kl. next day.. she doesn't let me kno.. and i ask and she says she goin to stay in the lib. i say kl. (she made the plans.. so its not like im pushing.. im just tryin to kno what im doing) later that night i call and she apologies for gone girl and we agree no plans until after her exam finish. i thought i would surprise her with drinks to celebrate.. so on the day her exams finish the followin text commence and it all ends - "dora call me when your out (she doesn't call) im out hw ws it one ok one **** ahh dw we will go for drink tonight in aqua had we organised this? we talked briefly, thought u could do with some cheering up lol i could but im goin to drinks with stacy ahh ok, well how about we go for drinks tomorrow (monkey face) im in hotels till fri, and so for the next 3 weeks, im only in london on the weekend, which is why i am seeing katy tonight. im thinkin.. not alternative meet up, i should back off and leave it, maybe hit her up later in the week. but it had been 3 weeks of odd texting, snapchatting and calling.. ( i just wanted to kno if she ever wanted to hang out) i say as a joke.. gettin a drink with u is like drawin blood from a stone haha, drinks at the shard on sat? her response - "lol i know im sorry." (i dont get this response... is she annoyed) 4 hrs later i try and call to explain and no answer.. the day before she sent me 1 or 2 text and answered my call. I dont get it ... i know i was maybe bit pushy and may have pissed her off.. but she didnt give me chance to explain and just straight up ignored me we had been dating for 2 months, not official but did i not even deserve a call/text/explanation or nothing? 7 days later i text and she seems friendly but off and doesnt want to chat on phone.. 4 weeks later i send joke and say "are you still causing trouble?" and she says "omg i was just thinkin about you today, hw are u? im still travellin im afraid.. we coninute to chat ... I keep blamin myself.. like only if.. maybe i should apologize.. i just wanted to hang out.. Link to post Share on other sites
Diezel Posted December 24, 2014 Share Posted December 24, 2014 Jesus, that was horrible to read. Either way, this relationship was done in the first paragraph. She started a new job, has all her time taken up, is using it to see friends and not see you. The interest just isn't there on her behalf. Just let it go. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Author lance69 Posted December 24, 2014 Author Share Posted December 24, 2014 Jesus, that was horrible to read. Either way, this relationship was done in the first paragraph. She started a new job, has all her time taken up, is using it to see friends and not see you. The interest just isn't there on her behalf. Just let it go. Thanks I thought so. The only thing that got me was she called me up the night she was out with friends. complaining about them how she hated it and hoped that she didnt think she was playng games. that she is just really busy. Link to post Share on other sites
Ieris Posted December 24, 2014 Share Posted December 24, 2014 Wish she would just be honest with you or you can take the hint with her lack of interest. If someone likes you, they will make time for you. Sorry Lance but let this one go... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author lance69 Posted December 26, 2014 Author Share Posted December 26, 2014 Wish she would just be honest with you or you can take the hint with her lack of interest. If someone likes you, they will make time for you. Sorry Lance but let this one go... Thanks Ieris... I know what you mean.. its weird to me.. because she was interested in the beginning... and the week before this conovo.. she asked hw i was feeling and how im doing blah blah.. almost like everything was ok. The night before the convo above she was still pickin up my calls and all.. I feel like somewhere in the convo above i ruined things... Would apologising to her be too much? Link to post Share on other sites
Elle1975 Posted December 26, 2014 Share Posted December 26, 2014 Thanks Ieris... I know what you mean.. its weird to me.. because she was interested in the beginning... and the week before this conovo.. she asked hw i was feeling and how im doing blah blah.. almost like everything was ok. The night before the convo above she was still pickin up my calls and all.. I feel like somewhere in the convo above i ruined things... Would apologising to her be too much? Apologize for what? Let it go. Anyway.. she might have been interested at first, then got to know you, and changed her mind. That's what the dating period is for after all. Not saying there is anything wrong with you, but it wasn't right for her. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author lance69 Posted December 26, 2014 Author Share Posted December 26, 2014 Apologize for what? Let it go. Anyway.. she might have been interested at first, then got to know you, and changed her mind. That's what the dating period is for after all. Not saying there is anything wrong with you, but it wasn't right for her. Yeh i understand but dont u think it is weird that after that one conversation.. she suddenly stops picking up my calls.. i mean the night before she picked up my call ... suddenly after that convo above... it all over without a call or text or nothing.. i text her a week later and she all friendly but again ignores my call attempt.. feel like that convo messed things up :/ Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted December 26, 2014 Share Posted December 26, 2014 Yeh i understand but dont u think it is weird that after that one conversation.. she suddenly stops picking up my calls.. i mean the night before she picked up my call ... suddenly after that convo above... it all over without a call or text or nothing. i text her a week later and she all friendly but again ignores my call attempt.. feel like that convo messed things up :/ Stop. She's not interested. Sometimes people aren't forward enough to let you know they're done and that they have no interest in pursuing so they are polite and entertain your communication with niceties. Regardless of what conversation started the downfall, she was showing you way before that she wasn't interested in making any effort to see you. Let it go. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
dumbass2 Posted December 26, 2014 Share Posted December 26, 2014 Stop with the communication and move on. Like others have said, interests change during the dating period and you are no longer a priority. Nothing you can do about it. You will drive her further away by doing what you're doing and in the process dis respecting yourself. There really is nothing more to this. Sorry, it's pretty clear. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
lauri Posted December 26, 2014 Share Posted December 26, 2014 She was giving you SO many signs, SO MANY that she wanted you to back off...they may not be obvious but I can read through every single one of her actions. Guaranteed if you passed that test (by pretending to not care and leaving her alone) she would've been more intrigued by you. You sound like you're waiting around for her and are constantly looking to talk to her...cmon man you need to get better control of yourself. Next time she contacts you don't respond and start to move on...there is almost certainty no chance of coming back from this. It's either she is into you or she isn't - and she clearly isn't. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted December 26, 2014 Share Posted December 26, 2014 Dude, she's brushing you off. She schedules herself with everyone else except you. DO you think she would cancel with someone to spend time with you? Has she even attempted to do this? NOPE! Dude, she's not into you and the only reason she's responding is just to be friendly and nothing more. Time to move on, dude. Conduct and experiment, don't contact her. None whatsoever. Let's see how long it takes her to contact you. Betcha it will be weeks and the only reason she would is to only see where you went and why you aren't contacting her anymore i.e. kissing her ass anymore. Dude, trust me. There are girls out there that would love to spend some time with you. That would love to go out on a date with you. So, stop pining for the one that ditches you to go out with someone else! Time to move on, dude. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author lance69 Posted December 26, 2014 Author Share Posted December 26, 2014 She was giving you SO many signs, SO MANY that she wanted you to back off...they may not be obvious but I can read through every single one of her actions. Guaranteed if you passed that test (by pretending to not care and leaving her alone) she would've been more intrigued by you. You sound like you're waiting around for her and are constantly looking to talk to her...cmon man you need to get better control of yourself. Next time she contacts you don't respond and start to move on...there is almost certainty no chance of coming back from this. It's either she is into you or she isn't - and she clearly isn't. Yeh im not normally like that.. im not normally that pushy.. like never am tbh.... that was the one time i was like that.. having a bad day and was bit frustrated since i didnt know where i stood with her and so i thought i would test her .. I feel i wasnt clear.. and that the right thing to do .. would have been to apologist for being pushy Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted December 26, 2014 Share Posted December 26, 2014 Yeh im not normally like that.. im not normally that pushy.. like never am tbh.... that was the one time i was like that.. having a bad day and was bit frustrated since i didnt know where i stood with her and so i thought i would test her .. I feel i wasn't clear.. and that the right thing to do .. would have been to apologist for being pushy It's not about you, it's about her. She's just not interested in you. Delete, block, forget. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lance69 Posted December 26, 2014 Author Share Posted December 26, 2014 Dude, she's brushing you off. She schedules herself with everyone else except you. DO you think she would cancel with someone to spend time with you? Has she even attempted to do this? NOPE! Dude, she's not into you and the only reason she's responding is just to be friendly and nothing more. Time to move on, dude. Conduct and experiment, don't contact her. None whatsoever. Let's see how long it takes her to contact you. Betcha it will be weeks and the only reason she would is to only see where you went and why you aren't contacting her anymore i.e. kissing her ass anymore. Dude, trust me. There are girls out there that would love to spend some time with you. That would love to go out on a date with you. So, stop pining for the one that ditches you to go out with someone else! Time to move on, dude. Yeh i get you. just plays on my mind that she called me up saying she is not playing games. that she is really just soo busy. and so i back off. for the whole week.. contactin her a few times.. suddenly a week later.. i try to orgnaise something and then blam! actions speak louder than words i guess... should have picked up Link to post Share on other sites
EgoJoe Posted December 26, 2014 Share Posted December 26, 2014 In the future this is what you do for these types of scenarios. "Hey, I know how it is to be busy. I get that way sometimes and I forget where I put my own feet! Let me know when you want to hang out just give me some advance notice just in case!" Go quiet, don't respond to anything short of let's hang out or a phone call m 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author lance69 Posted December 26, 2014 Author Share Posted December 26, 2014 In the future this is what you do for these types of scenarios. "Hey, I know how it is to be busy. I get that way sometimes and I forget where I put my own feet! Let me know when you want to hang out just give me some advance notice just in case!" Go quiet, don't respond to anything short of let's hang out or a phone call m ok kl... i handled the situation terribly .. because i was trying to get an answer.. when should have just back off and left it open.. guess i got use to us making plans regularly in the beginning. and didn't adjust when that changed... instead i got frustrated and didnt understand... im kinda ashamed because im usually quite laid back.. always have other things to do.. but from those text you wouldnt think.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lance69 Posted January 1, 2015 Author Share Posted January 1, 2015 Hey guys.. Curious what to do.. So the girl sent me a snapchat yesterday.. Not reading into it... She just sent selfie Happy new year, from barbados. Thats it... Obv with snapchat your have snapstory for you mass messages but u can also select ppl ... Do i respond with same courtesy or ignore!? Link to post Share on other sites
Elle1975 Posted January 1, 2015 Share Posted January 1, 2015 I'd leave it alone. She didn't make plans to meet with you, she sent a mass "happy new year". 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted January 1, 2015 Share Posted January 1, 2015 Do i respond with same courtesy or ignore!? Ignore and find some who is actually available. Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted January 1, 2015 Share Posted January 1, 2015 Ignore it. So, she sent you a selfie on snapchat. Big Deal! Means nothing. She probably sent that to 10 other people as well. Nothing in that was personal. Ignore it and move on. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Holmes85 Posted January 1, 2015 Share Posted January 1, 2015 Datin a girl for 2 months.. she starts corporate job.. making plans becomes difficult, she offers to meet up since she's free one week... fri and Sunday. fri night she ask my plans i let her know and she out with her mate in the same area.. i make a joke and ask were u.. she says she thinkin of heading home.. since she has work to do 2moro.. sat night i try to confirm cinema date plans and she's unsure due to exam she's revisin for.. she says she will let me kno and says it literally the last week, I respecet that say its kl. next day.. she doesn't let me kno.. and i ask and she says she goin to stay in the lib. i say kl. (she made the plans.. so its not like im pushing.. im just tryin to kno what im doing) later that night i call and she apologies for gone girl and we agree no plans until after her exam finish. i thought i would surprise her with drinks to celebrate.. so on the day her exams finish the followin text commence and it all ends - "dora call me when your out (she doesn't call) im out hw ws it one ok one **** ahh dw we will go for drink tonight in aqua had we organised this? we talked briefly, thought u could do with some cheering up lol i could but im goin to drinks with stacy ahh ok, well how about we go for drinks tomorrow (monkey face) im in hotels till fri, and so for the next 3 weeks, im only in london on the weekend, which is why i am seeing katy tonight. im thinkin.. not alternative meet up, i should back off and leave it, maybe hit her up later in the week. but it had been 3 weeks of odd texting, snapchatting and calling.. ( i just wanted to kno if she ever wanted to hang out) i say as a joke.. gettin a drink with u is like drawin blood from a stone haha, drinks at the shard on sat? her response - "lol i know im sorry." (i dont get this response... is she annoyed) 4 hrs later i try and call to explain and no answer.. the day before she sent me 1 or 2 text and answered my call. I dont get it ... i know i was maybe bit pushy and may have pissed her off.. but she didnt give me chance to explain and just straight up ignored me we had been dating for 2 months, not official but did i not even deserve a call/text/explanation or nothing? 7 days later i text and she seems friendly but off and doesnt want to chat on phone.. 4 weeks later i send joke and say "are you still causing trouble?" and she says "omg i was just thinkin about you today, hw are u? im still travellin im afraid.. we coninute to chat ... I keep blamin myself.. like only if.. maybe i should apologize.. i just wanted to hang out.. If you want me to sum this one up is one sentence then it would be "She's not interested in you at all". I would also strongly advice to stop yourself from contacting this girl. It's quite clear she knows she's on a pedastal, take her off from that, she's treating you like garbage and you still want to hang out with her? Have some self respect and drop it while you still have some dignity left. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lance69 Posted January 1, 2015 Author Share Posted January 1, 2015 Ignore it. So, she sent you a selfie on snapchat. Big Deal! Means nothing. She probably sent that to 10 other people as well. Nothing in that was personal. Ignore it and move on. Haha yeh i figured. Just she hadnt intiated no contact in the lat 2 months.. Nothing on xmas... Was just intriguied why send one to me now, probably just a mass as well. a reply, simple "happy new year"... Would that lower my self respect? Not reading into it and just being simple ... Link to post Share on other sites
Author lance69 Posted January 1, 2015 Author Share Posted January 1, 2015 If you want me to sum this one up is one sentence then it would be "She's not interested in you at all". I would also strongly advice to stop yourself from contacting this girl. It's quite clear she knows she's on a pedastal, take her off from that, she's treating you like garbage and you still want to hang out with her? Have some self respect and drop it while you still have some dignity left. Well yeh i figured... I mean... I clearly lost her someway on the way... We did date. I have gone NC for the last month.. Until her recent snapchat but i wont read into it... Im not one for burnin bridges.. So feel a simple response will be enough.. No hopes... Jus happy new year. Or simple "i will". I mean i may bump into to her.. Dont want it to be awk.. Just civil Link to post Share on other sites
Author lance69 Posted January 1, 2015 Author Share Posted January 1, 2015 I gather that most ppl are sayin ignore... Would be civil and repsondin with same low value be pointless ... Even just to be civil Link to post Share on other sites
Elle1975 Posted January 1, 2015 Share Posted January 1, 2015 If she wanted you, she would have accepted your offer to make plans weeks ago. It's not that hard to understand. She wouldn't send you some cryptic message via snapchat. Now if you are looking for the one poster who is going to tell "go ahead, answer it!", here it goes.. Go ahead, and answer it. It is your life, and you only are in charge of it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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