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Where did I go wrong!?


Breaks and Breaking Up It happens to most everyone at some point in life! Share your experiences!

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Old 3rd December 2014, 9:12 PM   #1
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Where did I go wrong!?

So my ex girlfriend and I had a great relationship for the most part.The only problems arising from exes, and life with children, none of them i considered major. She broke up with me about 5 weeks ago over an arguement. I immediately started no contact. I then went on with my daily routine, started working out and put up a facebook which i havent had one in 3 years. immediately from the facebook, women began to befriend me, so it was easy for me to go on a few casual dates.

I would not likely have began dating so quickly, had my ex gf not made sure i knew, 4 days after our breakup that she was in a relationship with a younger better looking man. However, i figured if she had moved on quickly, i might as well also.

It seemed very uncanny when she began contacting me for nonsense reasons, would text some random comment about every 2 days. I did not reply for two weeks.

After the two weeks, I would then give brief replies. then she began calling, i would answer the phone, engage in random conversation, which she would make sure would lead to an arguement.

About week three, she calls and asks if I am ready to 'straighten up' and get back together. I informed her that since she chose to make it known 4 days after our breakup that she was in a new relationship, that I was not interested. She said she did that to get my attention, it got my attention all right, made me go on dates much quicker than I ordinarily would have given under the circumstances. Honestly the fact that she did something like that in an attempt to be manipulative angered me as well.

Fast forward to week 4 I am sifting through 4 very attractive women trying to pick which one I like best, casually meeting up for coffee, food, etc. Unfortunately that was about the time for Thanksgiving, and I felt pangs of regret for not being more receptive of her offers to see me, and during the relationship she was very good to me, so i picked up a card, wrote to her that i wanted to thank her for that, and for the love and joy she had brought to my life while together. also i said that i would love her forever, which is true. Just that love changes over time.

This resulted in her beginning to make a play to get me back but pride would not allow her to do it without trying to make it look like it was my idea, which it was not, the purpose of the card was just that, a thank you, whether it was a farewell or not.

The friday after thanksgiving, she wanted to come see me at my house. I teased her about it, as I was on my way out the door to go see friends, but told her she could come by. She got angry and said she wasnt going to. Then she did come by, and then called me as if I had done something wrong. Refused to meet me in town, and we both went about our business.


Saturday rolls around, she and her brother invite me to a family get together, I decide to go, it went well and ended well with her committing to do whatever it takes to get me back. 100% on her part with no immediate committment from me.

I decided to give it a chance, but I had plans on Sunday with another woman who had really become overly attached after just 1 date. I decided I would proceed with the date but tell the overly attached chick that I was considering going back with my ex, which i did.

During my date of tying up a loose end, my ex is blowing up my phone. I did not answer until i was in the car leaving the overly attached chick behind. i then told my ex the truth of my whereabouts and the purpose of my date.

She is now apparently very butthurt because i didnt come running back to her with open arms. I dont understand why she feels this way given that she asked for no committment on my part, and I truthfully told her the purpose of the date was to end ties with the overly attched chick in a graceful fashion.

Now today is Wednesday. I had asked her for a date, which she has refused and has told me she no longer cares for me. What did i do wrong?
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Old 4th December 2014, 6:18 AM   #2
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She sounds like a total nutjob. Your game is solid I think you should see what else is out there.
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Old 4th December 2014, 6:44 AM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by crash1 View Post
I did not reply for two weeks.
This is where you went wrong.

Why did you reply after 2 weeks?

She has brought you nothing but misery and pain. Cut her off.
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Old 5th December 2014, 7:08 AM   #4
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Now she is posting on facebook all these quotes about moving on. i have a date tonight, and one with another young lady tomorrow night. I am very interested in what this weekend is to bring 😜
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Old 5th December 2014, 7:31 AM   #5
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Are you seriously asking what you did wrong?

Whatever this younger guy is (if he is even real), dumped her and now she wants to come back to you.

Why would you want that? You seem to be doing so much better on your own.
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Old 10th December 2014, 7:24 AM   #6
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Turns out the younger guy was a front designed to get my attention somehow. That didnt work, just pissed me off that she would pull a dumb trick like that and made me move on faster. I've got 2 dates with 2 women this weekend.

Now she says she is totally done with me and that i should forget her...after i threw her a bone yesterday by texting her that she was still on my mind. unfortunately i had my location on when i texted her, she saw it somehow and Im sure the map showed me at a oceanfront condo 80 miles from my house and honestly i had spent the night there with a woman. Fact is i know my game is solid. Im getting more dates and invitations than i have spare time for. Im not trying to. All i did was make a facebook and women i didn't know started coming my way.

The problem is I can take out, have fun with, have sex with, all the women I want to, but I still miss her. Call me stupid, but it is what it is.
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Old 10th December 2014, 10:36 AM   #7
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NC is the best option for both of you.

Anything else would just cause more upset.
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Old 10th December 2014, 1:48 PM   #8
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Unstability never is good news. Be single for a while, then date someone new. Someone who wont be as manipulative and wont make you walk on eggs over every little thing.
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Old 22nd December 2014, 8:04 AM   #9
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Now she is stalking me. And supposedly dating a local Deputy. Who does one call when ones property is being trespassed upon by a stalker? In my area, the Sheriff's department. According to the game camera i strapped to a tree in my driveway, she has even gone to the extent of using her mothers vehicle, which is black in color, rather than hers, which is a more visible color. I live on a large piece of property and my parking area cannot be seen from the main road. therefore she is driving up my driveway far enough to see around a blind corner into my back yard where I and any guests would park.

She has also interfered somehow with a couple of the women I was trying to get to know. This is unacceptable. I emailed her the pictures from the deer camera clearly showing her moms car in my driveway, almost on a schedule according to the time stamps. it has been going on now for weeks. i would not likely have noticed except I have a bright ass Frosty the snowman and I happened to step outside just in time to see the reflection of the car as it was backing out. i didnt know who it was, so i put the deer cam in the tree, because i didnt want anybody stealing Frosty.

She did not reply to the email with the pictures. I have respect for her new boyfriend. He is a really good Guy, although he has had horrible luck with women, makes less than a third of my income, and is unfortunately much shorter and balder, and just plain less presentable. However i have known of him for many years, and only have ever heard good things through many mutual friends. One of which is a female he has had a crush on and has been trying to date for about 3 years now to no avail.

Unfortunately his crush is crushing on me now. I may make room for her, as she has big boobs that are real, a good job, and other than the fact that she lives a little further than I like to drive..about 25 miles, she would fit right into the type of women I am currently trying to choose from.

About the stalking, Im hoping with Christmas coming up, she will maybe get busy and leave me alone. Why would one continue to torture herself doing the stalking thing? I dont fear for my own safety or anything or if she sees a womans car in my drive, which I imagine she has by now. I dont really want to involve law enforcement because it would inevitably come across her new bf's desk at work. I just dont want her to interfere with my life and I hope her behavior does not escalate.
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Old 22nd December 2014, 8:15 AM   #10
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You sent the email, now keep an eye on the cam, and sees if it happens again. If it does, I'd send her a certified mail asking her to stop. If she doesn't, contact the police. I think those steps would be reasonable ones.
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Old 28th December 2014, 6:38 AM   #11
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Took the crush out night before last...had some fun, and then had sex with her all night. Repeatedly, vigorously, and very successfully. I see why she picks up crushes. Waiting for small town gossip to begin. no more stalking that i know of. life is good
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Old 1st January 2015, 6:40 AM   #12
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Glad this forum is here..nice to be able to express myself. I dont discuss much of my personal life with my close friends. All have been happily married for many years, and for the most part, I dont share details of my single life with them..awkward to talk about these things to someone who has no point of reference to understand.

So,its new years eve eve. I am alone all day, no work, kids arent around..all my friends sleep late and have wives and children. So I decide to drink a little and hang out outside next to my fire pit and listen to music, play with dogs, etc.

Im not in any kind of relationship with a specific woman yet, and that day, I decided I would keep to myself. However, the ex girlfiends boyfriends crush, that was with me friday night wanted to stop by and hang out. I said great, come on, i had the fire and some alcohol, had cooked a big pot of vegetable soup, and was at that time beginning to shuck some oysters.

She shows up, we hang out, eat, etc..we are talking about general things, but i notice her phone is blowing up.

I said wow, someone has a friend, lol....she indicates that it is a guy who wanted to see her that night, but that she is not interested because other than being a nice guy, he is too fat and dumpy. Guess who it is, the ex gfs new bf whom has pledged his undying devotion to the ex gf and intentions to marry her when his divorce becomes final.

So what do i do....tell her, drop a hint, which if i do she will blow up and not leave me alone until i tell the whole story, or just leave it alone completely...this is not cool, i want badly to tell her whats up, then again, at this point it isnt really my business or my problem.
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