irresolute Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 (edited) Yes. That's my life lately. I have decent days, when I don't feel sad or depressed about the breakup, and I concentrate in other aspects of my life. Then, I watch a movie and the male main character's name is Johnny, and then...wow. Huge set back again, miserable day ahead. Today I was at Walmart and suddenly I saw the wax candles he used to burn at this home. With the burner he had as well. I had to buy it. Now, this stupid candle is making my house smell like his home and...well. I had to come here to write. Funny thing, I wish he were different, and I wish I'd had acted differently as well at the time. We screwed up, two troubled people. There is no future for me and Johnny together, there will never be and still, I care for that ashol.e. I still care and miss him, even though I'm no contact. I want so desperately to have some sort of connection with him, but no. No future and no hope, and it's not worth it, and I'm doing ok (besides buying the stupid candle). I hope tomorrow is better. (((This month will be 6 months since last meeting him. We broke no contact 10 days ago just chit chat, I never asked how he was, it was casual, and then nothing else. I haven't stalked him or connected in any other way. I unfollowed him on Facebook I have no idea what is he doing with his life.)))) Edited October 13, 2014 by irresolute Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Girl, throw that candle out!! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
lauri Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 ^^^ no kidding. That candle should go straight into the garbage. Link to post Share on other sites
Author irresolute Posted October 13, 2014 Author Share Posted October 13, 2014 Grrr...ok. Trowing the candles and the burner away right now. Link to post Share on other sites
Itsgonnabebetter Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Irresolute, I know how you feel. Life with my ex was chaos and would have been very difficult for my children if we'd stayed together; and breaking up was the best thing for everybody concerned. BUT..... I struggled for two years thereafter. Everywhere I turned, I was reminded of her. I was on an emotional roller coaster and I couldn't make it stop. Over time, things got better. Eventually, I found myself falling asleep at night and waking up in the morning without her on my mind. I stopped dreaming and daydreaming about her. And even though I still have memories of her, including some good memories, my heart doesn't ache anymore. I don't hurt anymore; I don't miss her anymore. My time with her was a chapter in my life, now closed. You'll get over this guy..... Stay busy, focus on yourself, accept the fact that it's over and understand that he's not "the one" for you. I think you said you know there is no future for you guys? Details aren't necessary, but if you know there is no future, let him go and move on. You'll find the right person for you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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