eyey Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 My ex gf of 3years broke up with me 7weeks ago. At that time, we were sort of living together, so I had to stay together for next 10days because of my commute, job…etc. Eventually, I realized that I could not live like this, so I basically disappeared when she was out of town. Obviously, during those 10 days I made many mistakes asking to take me back...etc, and also we had sex few times despite of her strong determination to break-up. I never forced her, but I have to admit I’m the one started the move out of desperation. Each time, I felt horrible, and she felt horrible. And after I moved out of her apartment, she texted me how sad she is and I ignored that for few days. But I decided to stop by her apartment to talk one night. I made more mistakes at that time, and ended up having sex feeling horrible again. I texted her few times after that night, but there was no response. I know it sounds rediculous but your logics go out of window when your emotions take over. I was such a mess around that time and decided to do No Contact for at least 30days. That somehow made me calm down little bit. After 30some days, she texted me out of blue saying "i'm sorry to do this, but I've been missing you. Hope you are doing well." I texted back a day later telling how i've been doing and asking how she's been doing.. etc. I played cool and casual without mentioning missing her and what not. Few days later I asked if she'd be down to go grab a coffe or a drink, she said she has to think about it. I was really confused as I assumed she wanted to "talk" about us. But I convinced myself that she just needs time to orgnize her thoughts. Since then she still initiated texts and became little chatty, and I was just wondering what's going on. Sometimes she just send me a photo of stuff we always talked about when we were in relationship. And that just drives me crazy. I feel like I went back to how I felt before No Contact period. I just don't know what she's trying to do. What would you recommend to do if i wanted to get back to my ex? Link to post Share on other sites
ThorntonMelon Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 I don't think she knows what she's trying to do except you keep her company. If she wanted you back, you'd know it. I recommend spending your energy on someone who is interested in being with you, or alternatively getting yourself in good mind when she comes along. Link to post Share on other sites
No Limit Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 You received a breadcrumb, nothing serious. The part "I have to think about it" is where she tries to tie you on a leash and string you along. Go NC. Link to post Share on other sites
toolforgrowth Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 She wants to know that she's still got you as a backup plan. You responding to her texts is telling her that yes, she still does have you as a backup plan. The simple thing isto not respond to her. Go NC. Her saying she misses you does not equal her wanting to get back together with you. Forget her and live your life. If she wants to be a part of it, she has to do a lot better than just saying she misses you. Link to post Share on other sites
Ben Dover Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 Don't feel too bad man. A lot of us have made the same mistake you did. I know I did. Now you see how important it is to keep NC. It's the hardest thing ever but look what happens when you stay in contact. Especially fresh after a breakup. It's obvious she doesn't wanna be with you right now. She's confused and being completely selfish. My ex would text me sweet things all the time. But whenever I brought up getting back together she said she needed to be on her own. Yet she would text me cute things once in awhile. You see now that NC is the only way. Keep it up man. If I can do it I know you can. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author eyey Posted July 3, 2014 Author Share Posted July 3, 2014 Thanks for the responses. So pretty much NC's the way to go if I wanted to get back together? Or better yet, actually it sounds like there is no chance to get back? Reason for the break-up was mostly because of my fault, so I kinda felt like I need to work way up to be back together. Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 Thanks for the responses. So pretty much NC's the way to go if I wanted to get back together? Or better yet, actually it sounds like there is no chance to get back? Reason for the break-up was mostly because of my fault, so I kinda felt like I need to work way up to be back together. Its not going to be a real "getting back together." This kind of thing always ends painfully for the person who cares the most. It's probably the better idea to ignore it. It will only cause you further pain. Link to post Share on other sites
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